Cultural Survey- do you smile

chanchy123

Mon, Feb 29 2016, 3:59 am

amother wrote:

Hi,
OP from the crying babies thread here. FranticFrummie pointed out that smiling is likely a cultural thing. So, a few questions:

1: where do you live? In town? OOT? another country?
2: will you initiate a smile if you see a woman that you don't know on the street?
3: will you reciprocate with a smile if a woman smiles at you?

I'll start:
1: OOT
2: yes
3: yes

Please keep this to women for now, thanks!

1. in Israel, a small yishuv.
2. no.
3. If she's not creepy then yes.

Also if we like shared a moment - I would smile at her. Like we both just saw a really cute kid drop his ice cream cone. Or something. I see women on the street all the time. If I'm not just walking around smiling it would be weird to initiate a smile at every random woman I saw on the street.

I'm editing to say, that I guess I would smile at a woman if I caught her glance, maybe if she seemed extra friendly.
I do say Shabbat Shalom to people in my community, because if I don't know them they are guests. In a city, only if I'm in a very secular area and I see other frum people, so I guess we share a bond. I grew up saying Shabbat Shalom to people I didn't know, living in a large yishuv in Israel.

etky

Mon, Feb 29 2016, 4:21 am

chanchy123 wrote:

I live in Israel but in a large yishuv.
I do not go around smiling at everyone because that is perceived as weird as Chanchy said - even in a (large) yishuv.
I do say Shabbat Shalom to people I don't know - but only if I pass them and we make some sort of eye contact and we are the only ones in the immediate vicinity. If there are dozens of people in the street strolling, talking in groups etc. it would be strange to stop and say Shabbat Shalom to everybody, even those who I know.
Something I've noticed though: If I am greeted or acknowledged in any way by someone, even if I don't know them, I will always return the greeting or smile. Kal va-chomer if I know them. However, there are people here, almost always native Israelis who have no problem ignoring a smile or even a verbal greeting like boker tov, even if they know you. That is rude IMO, even if it is cultural.

FranticFrummie

Mon, Feb 29 2016, 6:52 am

I love all you smiling ladies! Very Happy

I love Israel so much, and the weather has been so gorgeous, I can't help but smile whenever I leave the house.

I was walking to the pharmacy the other day, and about a half a block ahead of me was a young woman in very tight jeans. She had a great figure.

Walking towards us, were two construction workers. They didn't say anything to the woman, or harass her in any way, but once they were past her they turned around and stared at her rear end for a VERY long time. They just about tripped over their tongues!

Then they looked ahead, and realized that I just caught them staring. I started laughing, and gave them a little hand signal like "I see what you just did there, you naughty boys!" That made them start laughing, and I walked away still laughing and shaking my head. They guys were pretty embarrassed that I busted them, but it was all in good fun. LOL

I thought it was awesome that 1. they didn't approach the woman, 2. they had the decency to be embarrassed when caught, and 3. that they had a sense of humor about how silly the situation was. It's SO different than America, where you get cat called and stuff.