A question about the parent body in Orchos Chaim in Lakewood

amother

Pumpkin

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:48 am

I was one of the lucky ones to get accepted to Orchos Chaim boys school this upcoming year. I am just a little confused about the parent body. I was originally told that while not yeshivish it was a bit more to the right. Now someone told me that some mothers wear leggins there.
Which one is it?

amother

Forestgreen

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 1:34 am

Most of the parent body is more towards the left. The more yeshivish parent body is usually the rabbeim kids who go for free or the secretary kids. You do have some more yeshivish families from years ago that went there because years ago it was yeshiva ketana and if you could not get in there you go to Orchas Chaim. Today there are so many more yeshivos to the right that most parents that chose to go there are either more towards the left, more American, or bedafka don't want Yiddish for their son because he has a hard time with languages.

naturalmom5

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 9:41 am

amother wrote:

Can someone please explain this. This is the barometer for Judaism and spiritually???
Leggings?

I can be a closet atheist as long as I have the right hosiery

amother

White

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 10:53 am

While no one can judge your personal relationship with Hashem, leggings are a statement and people wearing them know that. You are an adult, by now you should know that right or wrong, people judge you by what you wear. You do not need this explained to you.

As far as Orchos Chaim, I know plenty of nice yeshivishe people with bright kids who send there because they were 1) lucky enough to get in and 2) they feel its a really well run school.

And their kids are happy to go there

amother

Forestgreen

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:18 pm

Op you didn't say what type you are. If you want to know if there are yeshivish people in the school yes there is. But the school is more towards a wealthy parent body and many parents do wear leggings there or couple eat and many things like that. Honestly I wouldn't care as long as parents are nice but if you are looking for a place where fathers only sit and learn and only yeshivish families then it's weird that you even applied there in the first place.

amother

Ecru

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:39 pm

I dont know about the leggings because I am not experienced much with the school, (but truly I have not really seen 'leggings' walking around lkwd.. maybe twice in my nine years living here so I cant imagine that the majoraty of parent body does it ) I know of two very nice familys that you would call 'more to the right' husbands working that send there. I know that that is not the majoraty though. Majoraty is 'more american' and that is why I did not send my son there which I regret to this day. I think he would have done much better in orchos chaim than in the 'very right wing school' that he is in now. Due to their open mindedness..not squeezig everyone into the same mold and for their english teitching. They also have a great remidial support system should the child need it. Think of what might be best for your child, though it might still be hard to judge at the kindergarden age like it was for me

amother

Coffee

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:43 pm

otoh my friend who sends there (her husband teachers there and she is very yeshivish) complains that she has to compromise her values sometimes to make sure her kids fit in.

Don't jump on what I'm saying because there is nothing inherently wrong with these things - just some people don't want their kids to do it. Think karate classes or harry potter videos.

If your fine with these things great - just know yourself and don't send to a school where you have to tell your kids "we are better than that - we don't do it" and make your kid bitter about yiddishkeit when all you are saying no to is something that has to do with harkashah.

amother

Brunette

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:49 pm

I don't feel I've compromised.
There are some minor pressures, but I think it depends on how much you make of it. I do feel I have to take my son's on a mid-winter trip after school (there is no wid winter vacation). My son did ask for Nike sneakers in 4th grade, and a sherpa style sweatshirt everyone was wearing, both minor, but beyond that there hasn't been much pressure or any negative influence at all (we live very simply, no movies of any kind, my kids have no computer access, etc)
Maybe its specific to my sons' classes but I've never heard about English videos at all. They are actually pretty strict and say that if you they do hear about it a boy can be asked to leave the school. My kids won't even bring jewsih periodicals to school.

I do think the English translation does label the school automatically less yeshivish.

amother

Blush

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 12:56 pm

amother wrote:

Does the bolded mean eating out???

If yes, what in the world is wrong with that?

amother

Ecru

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 1:27 pm

amother wrote:

Nike sneakers are worn in 'right wing' yeshivas also

Chayalle

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 1:48 pm

Lots of hs girls wear leggings though they are not visible under skirts and tucked into boot/booties. I'm guessing OP is talking about leggings with shorter, knee-length skirts. While I get that it's considered a statement, I don't really get why except that it is considered a statement. I guess the whys would be for a spin-off.

I can't imagine that it's so prevalent in Orchos Chaim, since I know people who send there that are so not like that. The people I know that send there are well-to-do but very much within the accepted norms of tznius.

amother

Mustard

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 2:10 pm

amother wrote:

Don't jump on what I'm saying because there is nothing inherently wrong with these things - just some people don't want their kids to do it. Think karate classes or harry potter videos.

If your fine with these things great - just know yourself and don't send to a school where you have to tell your kids "we are better than that - we don't do it" and make your kid bitter about yiddishkeit when all you are saying no to is something that has to do with harkashah.

If there's nothing inherently wrong with these things, then refraining from them doesn't make you better. And to say it out loud???

amother

Mint

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 2:17 pm

I really havent seen many pple wearing leggings under skirts in lakewood. From my understanding orchos chaim is amazingly run and has great rebbeim. Its more of a working crowd but to the right. I'd say its equivelent to tashbars parent body but a little fancier. As in all schools there are always going to be all types of pple. People will say YTT is soo modern, but there are so many pple that arent there. Its just all about the name a school has. I know lots of pple that wouldve loved to get into orchos chaim. Asking for Nike sneakers happens in all the schools. If a kid gets pressured by his friends he will ask for things, no matter what school he is in.

mommyla

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 2:54 pm

Chayalle wrote:

Goodness, I didn't realize leggings made such a statement. I guess I'm still an out-of-towner at heart (thankfully!). I ran some errands in leggings straight after the gym last week, will I not get my daughter into school? shock

(/sarcasm)

And no, I don't send my son to Orchos Chaim. But he did ask for Nikes recently. They're actually cheaper than the shoes at the frum stores so I'm happy to oblige... good prices on Zappos!

All that aside, I have a relative who sends to Orchos Chaim and has a bunch of boys. She says the crowd has definitely changed to the "cooler" side over the years as evidenced by the changing parent body as her boys go through school. Her younger boys definitely have more peer pressure and more wealthy classmates than her older boys do/did. It's a great school academically!

Chayalle

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:02 pm

mommyla wrote:

(/sarcasm)

Nowadays it seems like EVERYTHING is a statement. You just can't live your life and expect everyone to mind their own business anymore.

Hashem help me if I ever have boys, I don't know the first thing about them. Nikes? Heaven help me, they are okay for girls (or are they?) I'll get everything wrong, for sure.

mommyla

Mon, Mar 21 2016, 3:05 pm

Chayalle wrote:

They're fine for boys too (as far as I know!! Anyone care to enlighten me?), they're just the "in thing." My son also asked for "shirts with a horse on them" (he apparently has a pretty label-conscious class) but he's perfectly happy with the WalMart shirts with the little lions instead of horses Very Happy