now she's in TROUBLE

greenfire

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 8:11 am

I'm tired of helping - seems like it just doesn't matter anymore ... she got herself in trouble big time Twisted Evil

HindaRochel

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 8:13 am

That actually might be the best thing for her. Let her experience the consequences
Good luck

Mitzvahmom

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 8:15 am

I guess it's how I was raised...

That we are human and make mistakes, no matter what our parents love us.. But there comes a point, when we have to learn consequences, as long as u do not shut the door on her. Say I am here for you, but I am not covering for you anymore.

amother

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 8:49 am

im davening for you guys.may hashem send you peace and comfort. and security.

greenfire

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 9:34 am

thanks for the prayers - not sure what to do - I guess I'll know more after appointment today - but ...

greenfire

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 2:47 pm

now it's after and yes I am no longer sane ... she has been put under house arrest ... I feel like the prisoner ... can't think straight and I feel like Puke

chavamom

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 4:11 pm

greenfire wrote:

now it's after and yes I am no longer sane ... she has been put under house arrest ... I feel like the prisoner ... can't think straight and I feel like Puke

Oy, I'm not sure if that is more of a punishment for her or you. Big hug.

greenfire

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 8:17 pm

yup I feel punished Sad

thanks for the hug
now if only I had a beer to go with that Drunken Smile

then I'd have a beer hug

HindaRochel

Sat, Aug 04 2007, 1:50 pm

oy oy...yes it seems you are the one who has to bear the burden of her bad behavior...

Maybe you can find a babysitter for her...some older woman who looks as if she should be carrying a ruler, and have yourself a good time.

btMOMtoFFBs

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 7:21 am

Oy vey, this sounds so difficult and painful for you. Hashem should give you the strength and wisdom to handle this...

avigayil

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 8:48 am

You have to let her own up to her actions.
My tefillos are with you. But remember, you have other kids you need to think about. She has to realize you can't always bail her out. Sometimes you just have to cut the strings and see what happens.

chocolate moose

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 9:37 am

Green, it sounds like you need a hand with her. What about agencies ?

Mimisinger

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 9:45 am

CM - I'm so sorry. But you can surely let her deal with this on her own. She needs to learn the consequences of her actions and just pray that she'll get over this phase.

greenfire

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 10:14 am

chocolate moose wrote:

What about agencies ?

HUH?!?!?!

chocolate moose

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 11:11 am

You heard me. If she's so much trouble, maybe you need help with her.

greenfire

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 11:57 am

what kind of help are you suggesting CM ? do you think there is nothing that I haven't tried?!?!?!

mumoo

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 12:34 pm

Of course you have done everything you've thought of and were able to do. The one thing we can't do when it concerns our children is be objective and emotionless. Without realizing it we sometimes reinforce what we want to stop.

A residential facility (I know they exist in the secular, I would think there is at least one frum) has the experience, the persistence, the koyach, the emotional distance to work miracles. The hardest part is making the decision to send her away.

Are you at the point where you don't have any other option?

greenfire

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 12:37 pm

hey dear ... she is too extreme for a lot of these places even ... nobody wants to deal with a suicidal situation ...

mumoo

Sun, Aug 05 2007, 12:54 pm

I'm sorry, Green. I'm not trying to simplify. I just did a quick search. There are places. Maybe you have another plan in mind?