Teacher relaying private incident to mil about my child

amother

Black

Mon, Apr 18 2016, 2:37 pm

My mil had to drop my 4 year old at school today, she very very rarely drops him off or picks him up. When she dropped him off, The teacher told her about an incident involving my son, that should have totally been kept private, from anyone else except me or dh. She wamted mil to relay the message to us.

This teacher saw me at pick up, and could have very easily waited to tell me then. She asked me if mil spoke to me about the issue.

This is not something I would have ever shared with mil. It is however something important enough, that the teacher should have called me after school the day or happened.

What would you do??

mummiedearest

Mon, Apr 18 2016, 2:46 pm

inform the teacher that mil is not the person to speak to about this situation. any situation that comes up should involve you or dh and no one else.

Mon, Apr 18 2016, 3:18 pm

Speak to the teacher. Try to be calm and reasonable, but let her know this is important. There is no need to go to the principal unless you cannot resolve the situation with the teacher directly.

amother

Black

Mon, Apr 18 2016, 3:30 pm

cm wrote:

Speak to the teacher. Try to be calm and reasonable, but let her know this is important. There is no need to go to the principal unless you cannot resolve the situation with the teacher directly.

I was thinking of emaling the principle, with out full detail, to see if he could remind the teachers not to disclose info to non parents. I'm fairly certain it is school policy, and they are not even supposed to speak to parents concering issues in the carpool line (which the teacher also did with me today). But maybe that's a step ahead of what I should do.
This teacher is wonderful with the kids (I have helped out on occasion in the class), but tends to have no filter when speaking Her mind with adults (I don't mean she would use bad language or be innapropriate, but she can share too much). I'm afraid my speaking to her directly may not help...

I'm not happy that mil knows what happened, because I already feel like she knows every detail of my life, just from living close by.

amother

Seagreen

Mon, Apr 18 2016, 5:00 pm

Oh, op, I'm so sorry! I'm just shaking at the thought of that happening to me, because my mil is the type to remember stupid stuff years later after they've been resolved. I would be livid if a teacher said something confidential to anyone other me or dh. I think you should go to the principal, but not in a guns blazing manner calling for heads to roll. But Breach of privacy is a VERY serious matter and something the principal should be made aware of so that teachers can be reminded to be careful in this matter.