Uh oh- how to begin earning income with no background

SRS

Fri, May 13 2016, 10:11 am

amother wrote:

As a previous poster suggested, I think computer programming or accountancy are your husband's best choices. If he's bright, he'll pick it up quickly and be good at it. No real people skills needed - plenty of computer programmers are nerdy geeks - I work with tons of them, I'm probably one myself!

Are you kidding?!?!?! Being able to interview for ANY job is the first step out of their predicament. He needs to build some people skills before anything. Unless a person has a special MIT degree, they better be able to charm someone.

amother

Lilac

Fri, May 13 2016, 10:23 am

I think the IT (computer) field needs less people skills than Accounting. I am an accountant by the way. For your husband also consider Actuarial if he is great at math. It does take a lot of committment and a bunch of tests, but if he is really bright it is a good field. I agree with previous posters that he will need to get some people skills to get past any interview in any field, so worth focusing on that as well.

SRS

Fri, May 13 2016, 10:26 am

I've offered this and similar advice before since these threads come up all the time. Despite the fact that you are better off than the majority of working people (a paid for home and 20K in savings), you are in a pretty terrible situation if you are being cut off next month. You have 4 kids and are in your 30's with no job experience.

I think your goal right now (and your husband's goal) must be WORKING. Not school, not plans for a business, and sadly not your children's hours. Getting a education in a technical field is a good long term idea. But, after a decade of staying home/learning, the two of you need to start in the world as if you were 16, 17, 18, 19 years old. That means the highest paying hourly job you can find even if "degrading". The good thing about hourly jobs is that you might be able to work evenings or days and then switch. So while you work at a grocery store or a bank during the day, for example, he can work in the evenings, or visa versa.

Incidentally, both the bank and the grocery store nearby where I live will pay for 2 community college courses for employees who work a certain number of hours. On top of the employee discount for food, this is a nice benefit. And you learn to put in hours, work with people, and see what you like or dislike.

College isn't just an investment of time, it has a large opportunity cost of 3-4 years of no income and in the end, unfortunately, many students are still unemployed. Considering that neither of your have ever been employed, I think you should start by working on the employment piece.

kollel wife

Fri, May 13 2016, 10:32 am

I recently finished the Lakewood PCS programming class which was excellent.

I also think your husband could do well with programming or accounting. If you want to know more about it, you can PM me. You might enjoy graphics?

(I'm also great at living on a very tight budget - Mesilla could help with that too.)

amother

Copper

Fri, May 13 2016, 10:55 am

Live in Lakewood, here is what I think,

If you are not already on every gov't program, do so now. Its there to fill in gaps.

As for education, it depends on your dh nature, BUT...most professions don't pay that much unless you work in the city. It also takes about 3 yrs assuming your husband has a BA. If your parents are open to helping you with that, great. If not, you might have to go a different path.

(If you do have time for schooling, pharmacy- 5 years, or actuary, 2 yrs, engineering, are all good fields as well, but realize your dh will be in his high 30's before he takes his first job in those fields)

If you grew up comfortable, you should consider your husband starting a business. If he has a good idea. Successful businessmen do make more than successful accountants and forget 85k after taxes, going forward as you have more children and they get older, you will need double that to maintain the lifestyle you grew up with.

In any case, NOW, TODAY, learn how to budget. It doesn't mean you don't spend money, it just means you know how much you spend

sky

Fri, May 13 2016, 11:05 am

someone mentioned BA. He should have a number of credits from learning depending on the institution that can be used toward a degree.

For many jobs you don't have to be a "people person". As in smooth and talk people up. You have to be able to look a person in the eye, answer questions honestly and comfortable. Many people can do that. Not everyone is a shmoozer. I think that is okay for a lot of jobs.

amother

Cerise

Fri, May 13 2016, 11:37 am

SRS wrote:

I disagree somewhat with this. My dh is brilliant but not a people person. He got his degree is a specialized engineering field and not at MIT, at a state school. While he did get good grades, his company hired him for his engineering background, internship experience and because he is a go-getter and a get the job done type of guy. Now that he is moving up in the company, they are teaching him people skills by having him give seminars, meet customers, train new people and be involved in trade shows.

mha3484

Fri, May 13 2016, 12:34 pm

I think that you really have to do some introspection and figure yourself out as people. I think going against convention will help as well. I am the one in our family much more suited to rigid full time employment so I have a full time job with a salary and DH has a small business as well as taking care of the kids both of whom have regular appointments that need a parent. I was wondering last week how this works when two parents work full time?

So we have long term plans for how I can further my career and let him do what he enjoys and allow our children to be home with a parent. If I had the rigid thinking pattern that he has to have the full time job it would be a disaster for many reasons. I think the only way to be successful is to know yourself and work from there.

naturalmom5

Fri, May 13 2016, 12:47 pm

I apologize for being so blunt. I really mean it for your good, sincerely.

If your husband, is what you say he is , he can be ready to take actuarial exams or become a programmer in a year or less.. If not, he really isn't , and you should access his abilities.

I base this on knowing numerous guys that have done just that

Miri7

Fri, May 13 2016, 4:39 pm

I see a business opportunity - career counseling for folks transitioning from parental support to supporting themselves. Only thing is the parents would have to pay for it.

In all seriousness, do (1) work on budgeting better, now is the time to rein in spending and get accustomed to living on less (2) find good career counselors in your area who can help advise on paths and programs (3) informational interviews - meet with folks who've done the transition successfully - find out what they did, what they like/don't like about their new career, etc. (4) keep your parents informed about the steps you are taking to form a plan. They will feel a lot better about giving some support along the way if they can see that you have a good plan and are sticking to it.

SRS

Fri, May 13 2016, 5:01 pm

amother wrote:

Many state schools are specialized enough that they can bring job candidates with skills that overshadow in areas they lack. A young person is a different investment than a mid-30's, never had a job, kollel candidate.

And, yes, we all learn on the job. . . .which is why he should get a JOB.

amother

Cerise

Fri, May 13 2016, 6:22 pm

SRS wrote:

My dh's school did not give him skills. He got an internship by knocking on someone's door and becoming friendly with a guy. I.e. Most students were too scared because this guy is intimidating and really big. My dh's lack of social aptitude made him question why people are so scared. Turns out the big scary guy just had little social skills and they got along great for the next two years.

My dh graduated in his late 20's. His office was surprised to learn he was under 30 because he gives off a much older impression. Its harder to be older, but, not impossible.

If OP's dh is 30 and he goes for engineering, given that he can get a year of credits, he can finish at 33 if he works really hard. Depending on the type of engineering and his location he can earn between 45-75K starting salary. She can stay home with the kids and supplement with a playgroup.

abaker

Fri, May 13 2016, 9:09 pm

amother wrote:

Will you consider an OOT Kollel that pays.
I heard some pay $50,000, and they help with housing and tuition (or the school gives a break to those in Kollel)
This, plus renting your h ome, plus a part time for you, may cover your monthly expenses.

Where is a Kollel that pays 50,000???

abaker

Fri, May 13 2016, 9:17 pm

Op I think you are being very responsible and it seems like you and your husband will do what is needed to support yourselves. I agree with the posters who said to get some sort of training or education and perhaps your families will be able to pitch in for those costs. I think it would be a good idea for you to babysit other children while you are home with your 2 little ones. Also enroll in community college or distance education at the same time. Then you can make a little money while you start working towards a degree. Before starting courses decide what you want to do and speak with an advisor who can help you figure out what core classes you can take, that can later be transfered to a 4 year school/bachelor's degree if necessary for your field of work. Your husband too should take a job doing whatever and look into some sort of vocational or professional training. Hard work and perseverance are just as important as education so as long as you are willing to put in effort (which you both are) Hashem will help and it will all work out. Hatzlacha!

amother

Blue

Sat, May 14 2016, 2:54 pm

abaker wrote:

Where is a Kollel that pays 50,000???

North Miami Beach, but there are other places too.
That's what I heard.
But, you must interact wit th bala batim,
Which requires people skills.

They also help secure a job for the wife, and help get the kids into school at a much lower tuition.

BMG has a placement office, if you want more info.

If your DH wants to stay in learning this is a great opportunity.

SRS

Sat, May 14 2016, 10:44 pm

I was thinking about you over shabbos and how you draw the line at working when your children are home. I am pretty adamant about being home which is why I work from home/telecommute almost exclusively. So I get your want and I am sympathetic, while others might not be. But I have to wonder what messages kids are picking up when they grow up in a home where no one earns a living via toil? Since there is a good chance that your hope will be dashed, perhaps contemplating this issue might leave you with a more positive view if what probably lies ahead.

amother

Gray

Sat, May 14 2016, 11:23 pm

SRS wrote:

Even with MIT degree (or Princeton both of which my husband has), you still need to present well during interviews. I believe there are not for profit places that help people practice for interview to increase their chances of getting a job.