8 yr old son, speech therapist dressed sleeveless...advice?

geulah papyrus

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 3:04 pm

I see you're up in arms about this, OP, but hands down, she can wear what she wants in her workplace. If you feel that she's a good therapist, then don't stress about it. Another option is to suggest that she wear something that you feel is more appropriate to your standards. Of course, you should probably expect for her to tell you to find another therapist.

amother

Burgundy

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 3:12 pm

geulah papyrus wrote:

I absolutely love your screen name, Geulah Papyrus! I though of changing mine to Golgi Apparatus.

Mama Bear

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 3:41 pm

If the speech therapist is in a practice where the owner /manager is frum, you can ask them what to do - maybe they can request a certain dress code. You can't tell her to cover up; all you can do is switch therapist.
If most of the clientele there is frum kids I'm surprised the management didn't institute a dress code.

Btw, my autistic son has an aide who dresses year round in very short sleeved tops and she often has cleavage showing. Sometimes she's here for as long as 10 hour shifts. And I don't want to make her uncomfortable by telling her something, but I also don't want my husband and boys to be uncomfortable either. Talk about a difficult spot to be in!!

amother

Cyan

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 4:34 pm

OP,

I understand how uncomfortable this is for you. If this therapist works in a Jewish establishment, you can speak to the manager.

Otherwise, your probably best off switching therapists UNLESS your son has an unusual problem for which you would find it difficult to get another qualified therapist.

Hatzlacha!

amother

Rose

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 5:51 pm

I am going to be the voice of dissent here. First, wearing some type of sleeve is definitely in the realm of professional dress. Sleeveless is considered not professional in many settings. This is as per the dress code in all of the health care and school environments I have worked in as a therapist. Another issue to consider is that therapists are trained to respect clients cultural sensitivities. I think if is brought up in a non threatening way the therapist should be able to respect your cultural sensitivities and accommodate. I know I would rather be told, rather than lose a client and the pay, and potentially many other clients from the same cultural group. The wording that I would be comfortable hearing would be something like this "I hope you will not be offended, but I just wanted to bring to your attention as the weather gets warmer, we are sensitive to the issue of modest dress, especially with our boys. Is there any way you can accommodate this? I would love to continue to bring my son to you since you re doing such great work with him." If the therapist is professional she be able to respond and ask how she can accommodate, and then you can mention the sleeves issue. (She can wear a lab coat or a cardigan when she is seeing your child.)

I am not chassidish, but I would also be bothered by sleeveless with a service provider for my son. IMHO, too much is exposed, including bras and other things that should be covered. There is a reason sleeves are part of the professional dress code in all health care settings.

amother

Burgundy

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 6:04 pm

This post is just infuriating. I'm guessing OP is getting services COMPLETELY FREE through the board of education. If you want a therapist who dresses to your liking, hire someone privately that you know is chasidish/tznius. Op might be giving up a talented therapist because her arms are showing. Priorities, people. This post reeks of entitlement.

cnc

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 6:14 pm

amother wrote:

Chances are not, because if yes he would most likely be getting services in school with a provider that needs to adhere to the school dress code.

In regards to priorities, just because she doesn't share the same ones as you doesn't mean that she doesn't have them.

amother

Burgundy

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 6:23 pm

cnc wrote:

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Chances are not, because if yes he would most likely be getting services in school with a provider that needs to adhere to the school dress code.

In regards to priorities, just because she doesn't share the same ones as you doesn't mean that she doesn't have them.

Um, no. If she was paying privately she wouldn't have chosen this therapist. There are many facilities where you can get DOE services. Some schools have a difficult time keeping therapists because of inadequate work space, neighborhood, etc.

flowerpower

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 6:24 pm

I don't see what is that wrong with OP's issue! I was at a special ed none jewish school that had rules regarding how to dress. It is part of being professional in some places. If she works in a jewish agency find out if you can discuss it with someone there. Sleeveless is not the same as short sleeves. Short sleeves is totally fine.

amother

Cerulean

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 6:52 pm

I'm a speech therapist, and a few years ago a mother of one of my 3-4 year old clients started lecturing me (during the session with her young child) on the halachos of covering knees as my skirt did not cover my knees when I was sitting. I was disgusted - honestly. Not everyone holds by the same standards. I couldn't understand why this woman didn't understand that.

amother

Burgundy

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 7:35 pm

[quote="amother"]I am going to be the voice of dissent here. First, wearing some type of sleeve is definitely in the realm of professional dress. Sleeveless is considered not professional in many settings. This is as per the dress code in all of the health care and school environments I have worked in as a therapist.

This isn't true. I've worked in many clinics and some public schools, and in non-Jewish settings the attire is VERY casual. It is not considered unprofessional in many of these settings to wear a loose tank top and jeans. Particularly OTs and PTs, who are very active with your kids and need clothing that is comfortable before anything else, aren't dressing "professionally" unless they are in a setting that dictates this.

amother

Rose

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 7:38 pm

[quote="amother"]

amother wrote:

Tank tops ? Never. Jeans, sometimes, but not in schools. Usually khakis.

amother

Slategray

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 8:03 pm

amother wrote:

Tank tops ? Never. Jeans, sometimes, but not in schools. Usually khakis.

Where do you work amother? In Manhattan Brooklyn and nj schools and sensory gyms I've worked at sleeveless in the summer(not a tank top but a nice sleeveless shirt) and jeans have been common.

cnc

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 8:10 pm

amother wrote:

What makes you think that if she was paying privately she wouldn't have chosen this therapist? If I would be paying out of pocket you can bet I would be choosing a therapist based on skill and recommendations and not on religion factors (until such an issue would come up ).

All the facilities in my (predominantly chassidsh/yeshivish )area that are contracted with the DOE and/or accept RSAs have a dress code and some of them make the therapists wear scrubs.

I would never tell a therapist to cover up - it's not my place but these centers knows that most likely a majority of their clientele would leave them if their therapists are not dressed to the community's standards so they do what the buck demands of them. ..

amother

Rose

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 8:11 pm

amother wrote:

Where do you work amother? In Manhattan Brooklyn and nj schools and sensory gyms I've worked at sleeveless in the summer(not a tank top but a nice sleeveless shirt) and jeans have been common.

All the schools, children's hospitals, hospitals, skilled nursing facilities and schools I've worked in had a sleeves policy. It was also emphasized as appropriate professional attire in grad school.

It is possible some people don't adhere, but written policy is such.

mummiedearest

Wed, Jun 01 2016, 8:11 pm

amother wrote:

Id any day prefer sleeveless dress over my childs therapist showing up in her snood this week. I thought that was rude and disrespectful.

um, no. it is not rude, nor is it disrespectful, to show up in a snood. working with children all day requires comfortable dress, not business attire. plenty of people wear snoods on a regular basis. as long as it wasn't a bleach-stained old shmatta with moth holes in it, it's fine.