If your 3-yr-old reaches for the knife in your hand WWYD?

Rachel Shira

Tue, Jun 14 2016, 10:36 pm

If it was immediate danger, like she was already holding it, I would sharply say no and take/grab it away. Then say that knives are very sharp and are only safe for mommies and daddies, and you always want to make sure that she's safe so you had to take it away.
If she just was reaching for it but wasn't going to get hurt because you were holding it firmly, it was out of her reach, etc, I would calmly move it away and give the explanation with no drama.

Chayalle

Tue, Jun 14 2016, 10:38 pm

I had a special song I made up that I used to sing to my kids if they were taking something dangerous.

It went something like this:

________(Knives, sharp scissors, etc...) are not for _______ (name of child)
They can make a big boo boo
Mommy loves ___________ (name of child) so so much
That's why (knives, sharp scissors, nails) we cannot touch,
'cuz Mommy loves ________ so so much!

I'd just start the song, and they'd drop the item and join in.....

amother

Magenta

Tue, Jun 14 2016, 10:49 pm

Rachel Shira wrote:

Saw the poll after I posted. Why ever would you take it away but quietly let him reach for it again?

In the case I saw, the mother was in a sitting position. The child kept trying to reach it for two full minutes before giving up. I asked her why she didn't say anything. She said because he's too young to retain anything.

Rachel Shira

Tue, Jun 14 2016, 11:19 pm

amother wrote:

How strange. I can see that if the child wasn't in danger of actually grabbing it, to not make a big deal out of it or to stop giving it attention after a second or two, but to say that he's too young to retain anything is not true. Typically developing 3 year olds definitely understand that, and it's of course the time to teach them safety and listening to your mother when she says no.

And I love Chayalle's song!

seeker

Tue, Jun 14 2016, 11:34 pm

3 is not too young to retain "Knife is boo-boo!" at the very least. I would start at 1. What's going to happen when they find a knife and you're not there to gently move it away?

little_mage

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 7:30 am

I think I've scared my 2.5 year old daughter a couple of times when she's reached for a knife, by saying no too sharply. However, I then tell her, knifes are sharp and Mama doesn't want you to get hurt. I don't know if she fully gets it or not yet, but repetition is important for that age. To be fair to her as well, she likes to be in the kitchen and "help" so she's usually reaching for it in context, but that probably makes it more confusing.

imasinger

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 8:17 am

3 things:

1. LOL, too young to retain anything!

Science has shown that a 3 year old brain is retaining far more every day than any of our poor adult brains can hope to comprehend!

2. If the kid were to fall down, the force of gravity would not make a decision as to whether the kid were old enough to retain the message. She'd cry. Important consequences don't wait around.

3. I have seen 3 year olds use sharp knives (closely supervised) without a problem. I think Montessori teaches them that young. There is no magic age at which one is old enough -- it depends on the child and on the parents.

Therefore, even though I said #1 and #2 above, I would not say anything if I saw someone else's child doing something. I'm a big believer in letting parents handle things for themselves.

baby12x

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 8:23 am

Um.. my child is not yet three and he knows tons of stuff! Besides for safety, like no touching knives or ovens, he knows routines, songs, books. Three years old is old enough to understand many, many things!
If a child that age would have trouble retaining information, to the point that they can't learn that a knife is dangerous, after much repetition, that would be a red flag

amother

Burgundy

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 9:03 am

baby12x wrote:

Agree...my 3 yo can count to 9, knows most of the ABCs, all her colors, some aleph Bais. Many nursery songs. She remembers where stuff belongs and puts them away (laundry in the hamper, shoes in the box, trash in the trash can etc) She knows not to step into the street, she knows to move her fingers away when using a scissors, she knows that metal knives are for mommies and plastic knives are for kids. If she ever tried grabbing a knife she'd get a gentle but stern reminder that knives can make boo boos for kids.

Lol not to mention all the sneaky information retaining she does, like knowing where the key to unlock the door is and trying to use it. Twisted Evil

chavs

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 3:26 pm

amother wrote:

I'm guessing the child was much younger than 3 and nearer to 1?
Even so I am still unclear as to why the mum would let the child reach for the knife again and not just put it away?

amother

Magenta

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 4:36 pm

chavs wrote:

I'm guessing the child was much younger than 3 and nearer to 1?
Even so I am still unclear as to why the mum would let the child reach for the knife again and not just put it away?

No. The child was 3. The mother was using the knife. The child is normal for his age usually. I don't think it's normal behavior for a 3-yr-old to grab onto the mother's wrist and try and get something out of her hands. It makes me think that she has never disciplined him before but I don't know for sure. After all according to her, he is too young to retain anything.

sweetpotato

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 5:06 pm

A silverware knife? Or a sharp knife you use for food prep? The knives I use normally at the table aren't sharp. My not-quite-3 year old uses her own knife at the table. She knows that other knives (steak knives, kitchen knives) are sharp and if she was reaching for one, I'd tell her "No, that's very sharp! Only Mommy and Tatty touch the knives."

amother

Magenta

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 5:21 pm

sweetpotato wrote:

A sharp knife. It's good for you to tell her not to touch.

cuties' mom

Wed, Jun 15 2016, 5:54 pm

Chayalle- I love your song. What tune is it? My asd 7-year-old loves playing with knives. At home I only leave silverware knives where he could reach, but he got his hands on sharp knives at other people's houses.