Why don't people RSVP???

mo5

Thu, Jun 16 2016, 9:50 am

We put cell numbers on too as an option for replying- lots of people text
It's not weird to email and ask if people are coming- sometimes the invitation gets lost/undelivered/addresses change

I found that after I made my first 'big' simcha I- and my husband (if he brings in the mail) became much better about replying right away- (and putting into the digital calendar) (even if it's 'we'll only stop by so please don't cater for us) because we realized how much it's needed.

amother

Forestgreen

Thu, Jun 16 2016, 10:04 am

cnc wrote:

I have no way of knowing what time dh will be home that night, whether or not I'll be able to find a babysitter, how my evening is going (and how my kids are acting) or how I'm feeling.

Obviously for close friends and relatives I do what I need to do and make prior arrangements.

I'm referring to neighbors or acquaintances that I'm not very close with. (I can easily have Simchas three times a week bh)

So if it's a simcha that matters, you make it work. That's why it's insulting not to RSVP.
You are making it clear that this simcha is not high on your priority list. Better to say that you're not coming and send a note and/or gift instead.

cnc

Thu, Jun 16 2016, 10:14 am

amother wrote:

You have a point.
You gave me food for thought...

amother

Rose

Sun, Jul 03 2016, 2:44 am

I'm having a similar issue now. I am really disgusted at how few RSVPs I've gotten for DS's bar mitzvah. I think it's rude! I convinced DH that it's a waste of money for the return cards and stamps since we would anyway know who is likely to come, but on the other hand, since it's a summer simcha, it's hard to predict who will be away. So we printed RSVP with an email and home phone number. So far, I've gotten one email, and one text, and no phone calls! Yes, people may still respond, but I don't think it's that likely they'll remember if they didn't do it immediately. I don't know what people are thinking: A. it's just a suggestion? B.The RSVP is meant for people that can't make it, but of course they're coming? C. The contact info is if you have a question, but no need to confirm that you're planning to attend? I am in BP, and most of our guest are chassidish and the RSVP printed on the invitation is not common yet in these circles, but I think it's really rude. Cmon, people, where's your common sense and common decency?!? Please help me understand!
Next DS' bar mitzvah will also take place in the summer iyh. I'm definitely planning to send return cards this time...

cnc

Sun, Jul 03 2016, 8:26 am

amother wrote:

How long ago did you send the invite and when is the bar mitzvah? I think people have a better idea of their plans closer to the date and don't usually respond immediately when they get the invitation.