13 yr. old and nailpolish

amother

Khaki

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 5:28 pm

We are yeshivish but open minded. We dont go to movies but my kids will watch clean movies at home.
That being said, my DD 13 yrs. asked if she could go have her nails done with her friend and her friends mother who also are on our level of frumkeit I said no and then she asked me if she could get her toes instead. I said no because I dont feel a 13 yr old has to go to a nail place and spend the money. I do let her go before yom tov but just because it is the summer there is no reason to.

What is your opinion on this topic. I am curious to hear.

PS she is not my first girl I have 5 girls older than her but this never came up. My girls always started when they were out of high school.

PassionFruit

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 7:02 pm

I don't think there is anything intrinsically wrong with nail polish, if she wants it, let her. If you don't want to give her the money, let her use her own babysitting money. I think some schools look down on bright colors, so maybe advise her to stick to more toned down colors. No big deal, some girls are more girly than others. I was wearing a full face of make up by 14.

PinkFridge

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 8:16 pm

amother wrote:

How much older is the sister closest to her?
Is she going to camp? Is it cool to have your toes polished at the pool? Is it a normal thing? Will she want to do regularly or once in a blue moon?

When my kids started wearing nail polish, they would get more sedate colors for their hands (and IIRC not push the envelope at school, I.e. take it off before school) and whatever they wanted for their toes, which they kept covered unless at the pool, etc.

FranticFrummie

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 8:16 pm

DD went through a phase where she wanted nail polish. The school only allowed clear, sheer light pink, or sheer beige. I got her a pale pink with just a touch of shimmer. She only has the patience to put on one coat, so it was really barely there.

For her toenails, I let her go wild. We don't wear open toed shoes or sandals, so no one was ever going to see them except around the house. I had a ton of crazy colors that I was using for a craft project, and some days she had a different color on every toenail!

(BTW, did you know that you can paint raw brass jewelry components with nail polish, and then seal it with two-part resin? It comes out looking like very expensive heat fired enamel!)

She got bored with it after 6 months, and never looked back. To this day, she doesn't even wear lip gloss. Her classmates are horrified, and look at her as if she were raised by wolves. They can't imagine a day without a full face of makeup, while DD feels just fine about herself, zits and all. No insecurity there! Very Happy

amother

Mistyrose

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 11:45 pm

I purchased some fun colors for my DD. I allow her to put on polish on her toes whenever she wants. I felt like it was a compromise to getting her (hand) nails done this young. No one sees her toes.

bluebird

Fri, Jun 24 2016, 3:06 pm

amother wrote:

That being said, my DD 13 yrs. asked if she could go have her nails done with her friend and her friends mother ...

I dont feel a 13 yr old has to go to a nail place and spend the money.

To me, this sounds like a special treat her friend's mother has for her daughter and is inviting your daughter along to share in that. I think it would be ridiculous for a 13 year old to go to a manicurist regularly, but as an occasional treat why not?

Chayalle

Fri, Jun 24 2016, 3:15 pm

Seems like everything is being done younger and younger these days. I definitely know some girls from pretty yeshivish homes who are getting mani/pedis, as young as about 12 or so (some of them are not necessarily headed toward being yeshivish themselves).

I actually have no problem with my girls painting their toes by themselves, for fun, especially since toes are kept covered around men, so only girls/women are seeing their toes. Even my 8 year old has her toes painted green, courtesy of her big sisters. On their hands, my DD would only wear light colors.

However I don't take them for professional manicures/pedicures till 11th grade - around 16 (which probably puts me into the old-fashioned mom category). Only my oldest is past that age, and we usually go for manicures together before Yom Tov.

DrMom

Sun, Jul 10 2016, 7:06 am

Ruchel wrote:

I would certainly not allow to do it professionally shock

but I would allow nail polish out of school.

Because it's a waste of money (if so, I agree!), or because there is some other distinction between a salon manicure and a home polish?

Ruchel

Sun, Jul 10 2016, 10:46 am

DrMom wrote:

Because it's a waste of money (if so, I agree!), or because there is some other distinction between a salon manicure and a home polish?

Money and "gefil" lol. Where I am, even most moms don't go for manis...

Mommy3.5

Sun, Jul 10 2016, 6:16 pm

I don't see this as a big deal at all. She isn't in school now, and it doesn't hurt anyone. And it will make her happy. Personally this isn't something I'd choose to do battle over. My mother took me at that age, as did my grandmother. But then again, I take my five year old for manicures with me, and often do her nails at home. 💅

Mommy3.5

Sun, Jul 10 2016, 6:20 pm

Miri7

Tue, Jul 12 2016, 1:16 pm

I allow DD to do her nails and she can go to the salon with for a special occasion (grandmother visit, Yom tov, etc) or once in a blue moon just for fun.

I prefer that she wears colors that say "little girl fun" rather than trying to be a grown lady. That usually means lots of sparkles.

I feel very differently about makeup because I see makeup as for grown women. Makeup is to look beautiful, while nail polish can just be fun.

DD has played with makeup in the house but I won't let her step outside with it in until she is in HS and even then it will be very minimal and barely there.