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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
Would you let your DH take 5 boys to the pool?
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amother
Purple


 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 11:58 am
We have 5 boys ages 12-1/2, 11, almost 9, 7, and 5. We hold that boys don't go swimming with women from age 3, so the only way they can go is if DH takes them all. Would you let your DH take 5 boys together or is it too many to watch safely? DH is quite a responsible father. The older 2 boys know how to swim - not amazingly well, but they're pretty independent in the water, and the 12-year-old hardly needs to be watched. Do you think this is a safe arrangement? Last year we kept the youngest of them home since I felt it was too dangerous and he didn't really care, but this year he's been begging to go along with his brothers.
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sky




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:08 pm
Are you able to go to sit on the side and watch?
I probably would, but it would make me nervous.
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amother
Purple


 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:15 pm
No, women aren't allowed into the pool area during men's swim. Sad
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:20 pm
Assuming the pool has ample life guards and your older children have a good sense of safety I would. My answer would be different if you were talking about much younger kids.
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WastingTime




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:26 pm
I also have 5 boys and my dh takes them to the beach and the pool. The beach is easier because some play on the sand while he takes some in, the pool he tries to go with only the older 4. As mentioned if there is a lifeguard and the older ones can fend for themselves somewhat it should be fine beH
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Amarante




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:28 pm
At the age of your older children, we were sent to a pool with only the lifeguard supervision. Assuming the pool has adequate lifeguard supervision, I think it's safe in a pool. The older two should have a buddy system anyway as they are of an age when they are certainly responsible. Are they swimming laps or just frolicking.
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sourstix




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:29 pm
Please get a life guard. Don't take this lightly. Water has potential of danger. Even with a life guard things happen. You can't be too careful. If something happens what will you tell yourself?
I am saying this while my neighbors have a in ground pool without a life guard present and a lot of neighbors don't take this seriously. Ds wanted to go and I said no. And I was the only one to say no. I know I did it knowing I did the right thing.
Please don't allow any swimming without a life guard. I beg you. It's precious life and it's not worth it.
Lakewood is full of private pools. And every year we hear of someone drowned rl" for some reason people take it lightly. This is a message to everyone who has a pool or goes to one without a lifeguard please do the responsible thing!
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amother
Purple


 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:41 pm
There's a lifeguard at the pool. Just one, and my kids tell me he's often busy with his phone, but he is there. A couple of weeks ago, a kid almost drowned right in front of the lifeguard and an ambulance had to come take him to the ER, so maybe he's more careful now.

The 2 older boys are quite safety aware.

Thanks to all of you for making me feel better.
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Amarante




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:47 pm
If this s a public oil, I would complain fab out the lifeguard for the safety of all the children.
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:50 pm
I would allow it as long as your older two are responsible for each other as buddies. One adult, no matter how responsible, cannot safely look after all 5, and one lifeguard is good, but not a substitute for parental supervision.
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anotherima




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:57 pm
I would have the little ones swim with a tube or life preserver.
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amother
Natural


 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 12:59 pm
I would, but only if dh stayed out of the water and just watched them. I would have the 3 younger ones only go in right in front of where dh is sitting, and have dh not take his eyes of them except for once in a while looking up to check on the older two boys who I would pair up together. If the water is deep, I would only allow the 5 year old in with his 12.5 year old brother with dh watching.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 1:11 pm
well if you have boys someone needs to take them ... make sure they all know safety rules and teach them how to swim

lifeguards are a safety net - but not necessarily able to save everyone

I've taken many kids - when they were little always near the lifeguard and a watchful eye ... don't assume you don't have to watch them ...

also if your pool doesn't have safety rest time create your own because swimming is tiresome - dedicate 15 minutes for every hour of quiet sit down or snack or bathroom breaks
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sourstix




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 1:11 pm
So u see that even with a lifeguard you can't be too careful. If this guy isn't doing his job then I wouldn't let my kids go. Maybe I am paranoid. But better safe then sorry. This lifeguard is clearly not doing his job. Hashem yishmor. Be safe. Water is fun until something happens.
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sourstix




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 1:13 pm
Btw tubes are extremely dangerous. In a lot of places they don't allow tubes.
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applecake




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 3:01 pm
Get the smallest a Puddle Jumper. And swim lessons for everyone? Five is plenty old enough to learn how to swim.
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SacN




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 3:01 pm
Hire a teenager babysitter to come with your husband to the pool. He's in charge of two while hubby watches 3, and who can switch with clear instructions from dad.
I've done this with a lady friend and our kids at a women's beach. Best money spent that day.
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bluebird




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 5:09 pm
amother wrote:
There's a lifeguard at the pool. Just one, and my kids tell me he's often busy with his phone, but he is there. A couple of weeks ago, a kid almost drowned right in front of the lifeguard and an ambulance had to come take him to the ER, so maybe he's more careful now.

The 2 older boys are quite safety aware.

Thanks to all of you for making me feel better.


That lifeguard should be fired, not dealt with as if he learned a lesson. If he is still on duty, I would not go to this pool anymore, end of story.

People who are drowning do not look like what you would expect, and it's critical to have a trained lifeguard that is trained in knowing what to look for and how to rescue drowning people. In fact, if you try to save someone and aren't trained the risk is incredibly high that you will also drown because the victim's instinctual behavior will pull you under. Even attentive, intelligent parents can miss the signs because they don't know.

Everyone, please watch this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8O-gVzpEAg
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 5:16 pm
bluebird wrote:
That lifeguard should be fired, not dealt with as if he learned a lesson. If he is still on duty, I would not go to this pool anymore, end of story.
...
Everyone, please watch this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8O-gVzpEAg


I totally agree with you - that boy should be fired ... being on a phone is reckless

my daughter was a lifeguard & never had time to even get herself wet because she took the responsibility seriously - never keep your eyes off

and that you tube is quite powerful & informative - another reason why 1 lifeguard is never enough
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Maya




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 10 2016, 5:31 pm
No. I wouldn't even trust myself with more than two or three kids, and I'm an attentive and obsessive helicopter parent. How can one person keep an eye on five kids?
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