Advice on what books to read?

amother

Lilac

Sun, Jul 17 2016, 9:15 am

im the op fromt he thread of my ds not diagnosed yet and hes 7. showing signs of social issues and adhd markers. has enco. I was looking to see if anyone has any books that would help me understand adhd and enco. I know that it can come together at time I was told. I dont need specifically both issues together in one book. I just want understand ds a little more and learn how to direct him more. can you recommend a book that would guide me till I have him evaluated which will take time.

amother

Cerulean

Sun, Jul 17 2016, 2:12 pm

amother wrote:

Instead of sitting around reading books, why don't you get his enco sorted and spend time interacting with him more? Books can be helpful but they won't help you understand him as much as you playing and talking to him will. Sorry if I sound harsh, I know a teenager who had enco and eneurisis and it really annoys me that people let it get to that stage. Hatzlacha.

amother

Bronze

Sun, Jul 17 2016, 2:57 pm

amother wrote:

Actually, you sound judgemental. I also know someone who has encopresis, and I also know that despite the parents' best efforts the issue has yet to be resolved. There aren't always easy answers, though I sincerely hope OP's son's issue is resolved swiftly.

amother

Cerulean

Sun, Jul 17 2016, 3:54 pm

amother wrote:

I had to spend time picking up the faeces from the floor of a teenage boy because his parents couldn't be bothered to deal with enco earlier. So yeah, forgive me if I am being judgemental.

amother

Bronze

Sun, Jul 17 2016, 4:07 pm

amother wrote:

I had to spend time picking up the faeces from the floor of a teenage boy because his parents couldn't be bothered to deal with enco earlier. So yeah, forgive me if I am being judgemental.

I'm so sorry you had to deal with this awful situation! We all see things based on our personal experiences so yeah, I'm coming from a different perspective.

The parents of the child that I'm referring to have spent thousands and have tried many many different things to help their child, yet the school keep implying that if the parents really tried, the issue would have been resolved.

Perhaps the parents with whom you are acquainted are being negligent but I just wanted people to know that lack of results is not always for lack of trying.

OP needs to do all she can to help her child overcome the encopresis but since it will most likely be a process OP may as well read books to improve her parenting in the interim. The poor child is suffering enough, a little more understanding from his mom can go a long way.

OP, imasinger usually has good book recommendations for adhd. If she doesn't respond perhaps you can PM her.

Good luck!

amother

Lilac

Sun, Jul 17 2016, 6:51 pm

Excuse me! How dare you judge me! U didn't even ask me if I am dealing but is already judging. I don't want to hear any of your advice! You are seriously a sad case. If you have nothing nice to say don't.
Wow! This thread and imamother was not ment for this. So I'll just have ignore her she has no idea what this situation entails.

This was is one be of the most painful comments I've gotten here. I hope she gets this message.being judgmental as amother?
I pray that you don't get tested in ways like this so you learn to b more careful

amother

Ginger

Mon, Jul 18 2016, 10:54 am

Sorry I can't help for the encopresis--much hatzlacha with that! But I am currently reading a book about social skills difficulties in children with learning disabilities, including ADHD: "It's so Much Work to be Your Friend" by Richard Lavoie.

debsey

Mon, Jul 18 2016, 12:38 pm

amother wrote:

Wow, I hope you never have personal insight into how/why your comments are both judgemental and foolish. In your case, ignorance really is bliss. OP is trying really hard. While waiting for the professional who can help her, she is being proactive and trying to learn as much as she can on her own.

When you say - "get his enco sorted" - HOW, exactly? That's what reading books will tell her. By giving her insight into how his brain works, how his disorders work, and how he can be helped, books can be an important first step.

amother

Lilac

Mon, Jul 18 2016, 4:38 pm

thanks debsey I knew I can count on someone standing up for me. I am seeing a psychologist with ds. and his condition is under control as of now. I hope he keeps on improving. its just his other issues that are making everything so complicated. I feel so alone sometimes. I feel so sad. I feel like I lost my yummy innocent child because of it. he tells me he thinks he different then other kids. thats a sad comment coming from a 7 year old. and he is seeing a top GI. he has a very good team thats working with him. thats not my worry. the fact that the school cant deal with his other isssues and are blaming us for it. is even more painful and the fact that the rebbi really doesnt like my ds is even more painful. hes not in school so I dont have to deal with him anymore. but we ended the year in a very horrible distasteful way. I couldnt help that he was on my sons case constantly and didnt see a good thing about him. I decided that as a mom I have to get whatever info I can get before I get to the professionals. I do have an idea of what his issues are. its very obvious that he has components of adhd. so I am thinking that some good books will guide me somewhat.

FranticFrummie

Mon, Jul 18 2016, 5:35 pm

This book is not specific to what you are asking, but I found it to be a lifesaver. "Parenting with Love and Logic" was amazing for me. It helped me communicate effectively with DD, and helped keep me calm in tense situations. I was better able to sit out her epic meltdowns, and work with her to find solutions. It will definitely work with a 7yo.

"Parenting Teens with Love and Logic" is now my "bible" for raising DD. I cannot recommend them enough. DD is really happy with the way our relationship is going, and agrees with the principles in these books 100% (even when she doesn't get her own way.)

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Jul 20 2016, 11:23 pm

Just found this resource for enco
And remembered this thread and
Thought it would be helpful for OP
- forgive me if Im stepping over boundaries

http://www.bedwettingandaccidents.com/