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Does your husband shave "for work" during the 3 weeks?



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amother
Sienna


 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 6:54 am
Dh always shaves during the 3 weeks. He works in an office that is mostly frum. They meet with non jewish clients every so often. When I ask dh if our son can get a haircut during the 3 weeks he says absolutely not. Yet he shaves "for work" everyday as do many frum men. Its not 1960 and men aren't really at risk of losing their jobs for wearing a yarmulka or not shaving for 3 weeks. Where is this heter coming from?
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pesek zman




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 7:05 am
My husband most certainly does. He works in a professional secular environment. He goes out to meet clients every day. He must wear a suit and tie every day. He's not even allowed to wear a short sleeve shirt or to ever take off his jacket

The issue is not if he had a nearly kept beard (which he does not) The issue is that when a beard grows (over the course of 3 weeks) it looks messy and unkempt. It looks unprofessional.

I wouldn't say he would be at risk of losing his job if he didn't shave but it would certainly get him reprimanded
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animeme




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 7:11 am
Agreed that you can't meet a client with a week old beard. And dh doesn't get his hair cut during the three weeks, but is careful to get it cut close enough beforehand so he won't look overgrown. If he had a nice beard, it would be fine, and he wears his kippah, no problem. But you must look well-groomed.
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LittleDucky




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 8:51 am
My husband is the only Frum person in his office so he must shave. He doesn't get haircuts but he shaves during sefira and 3weeks because he must look professional at all times.
He might not technically lose his job but definitely would look bad, might get a "talking to", and lose out on promotions etc. he was told to shave.

I know men who don't wear a yalmulkah to work in the USA. They have been working there for decades and when they started they were told not to wear it by their Rav.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 9:08 am
Not shaving is meant to evoke sadness. Sometimes, it's more appropriate for men to shave. In that case, maybe you could use the three weeks to focus on churban Yerushalyim in other ways.
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causemommysaid




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 10:17 am
My husband shaves if he is meeting with a client. Otherwise his office has a business casual dress code so he doesn't have to.
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amother
Sapphire


 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 10:36 am
LittleDucky wrote:
My husband is the only Frum person in his office so he must shave. He doesn't get haircuts but he shaves during sefira and 3weeks because he must look professional at all times.
He might not technically lose his job but definitely would look bad, might get a "talking to", and lose out on promotions etc. he was told to shave.

I know men who don't wear a yalmulkah to work in the USA. They have been working there for decades and when they started they were told not to wear it by their Rav.


I don't know if you are in the US but if you are not shaving is a reasonable religious accommodation and is protected by law.
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amother
Brunette


 

Post Sun, Jul 24 2016, 10:58 am
My husband doesn't shave during the three weeks unless he is meeting with a new non-Jewish client. In general he tries to avoid all meetings with non-Jewish clients including old ones during the three weeks.

When he does shave he is so embarrassed that he only davens in a shul where no one knows him until he starts looking unshaven again.
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