Reprimanding my son

solo

Mon, Aug 08 2016, 2:46 am

I am constantly reprimanding/ disciplining my 5 year old son. He's very sensory and does things that seems so age inappropriate. He does not sit still for an entire minute. So meal time is a mess. Crumbs large prices of food go everywhere. Despite constant reminding and a stack of napkins, he wipes his hands and face on his shirt, pants, the table, the wall... When a meal is done my kitchen needs a scrubbing and his clothes must be changed. When he's playing on his own he makes awful messes by stepping on things, mushing things, breaking things... Even during a structured activity one hand or foot is messing up a couch pillow or being otherwise destructive. He he gets Ot/ pt 2x weekly. I feel like I spend all day telling him to stop doing that or touching that or climbing on that... Redirection lasts for a second. This is so demoralizing for both of us. And makes him an unwanted guest at friends homes.

amother

Plum

Mon, Aug 08 2016, 3:52 am

solo wrote:

Raising a child with sensory processing difficulties can be hard until you and he get a handle on it. Is your OT giving you good guidance on how to manage his sensory issues at home? Building a sensory diet? Do you have any equipment at home to help him get the right kind of sensory input at the right times throughout the day? OT 2x weekly is nice but it doesn't help you and your son cope day to day. Parental guidance and sensory diet should be the goal of OT. If your OT has not worked this out with you please ask why. If this is not what he/she does, please find a different OT.

imasinger

Mon, Aug 08 2016, 6:44 am

Here are a few ideas.

- Arrange a sensory playtime shortly before mealtime, but ending with enough time to wash up well, and get into a new mindset. You can do finding objects in theraputty, finger painting, playing with shaving cream on a tray, a sandbox or table.

- For just a few minutes before the meal, try an activity that enhances fine motor control and utensil use -- tweezers, eyedroppers, beading.

- Announce mealtime, and work together to set the table. Figure some small reward he can earn by winning the daily mealtime challenge.

- Start the challenge small. Three bites using a fork (choose an easy food)? Something he can do already. Over time, extend the number of bites, and then, try harder foods, like soup or spaghetti.

Cheer and reward. Ask him if he can do it again at that meal. If he says yes, repeat.

If he says no...

- tie on a bib or napkin, put him at a small table removed from walls, offer him a choice every 3 minutes about who wipes his hands, you or him.

- Or, leave him as he is, and, after the meal, have him help clean anything that got dirty, including clothing -- he can change - walls, floor (he can help sponge and sweep). No reprimands, just praise for helping, and no free time till the job is done.

Notice, you'll have to give him undivided attention at mealtime. That's a challenge, but if you can manage it, you may find it worth your while.

Remember to keep focused on staying positive! Reprimands don't work, and get in the way of your ongoing relationship and your ability to help him.

These ideas are based on what we have learned through OT and ABA. Maybe you should consider having your DS evaluated and seeing if he qualifies for these services.