Miserable to go to camp

MadameX

Thu, Aug 11 2016, 6:55 am

My soon-to-be 4 year old DS is miserable the whole summer because of his camp. He went to Nursery during the school year where it was hard for him to go for the first few weeks, but afterwards he couldn't wait to go. He used to run in with a lot of joy and excitement. Now he goes to a camp that is not affiliated with his school. I expected him to be unhappy for the first two weeks since it is a new place. But now we are into the second month and he still cries when I drop him off. At home he would tell me he doesn't want to go to camp and that he is scared. I ask him why he is scared, is it another boy, or maybe a Morah. He says he is scared "because mommy/daddy left him there". Which is unusual to me because he didn't have a problem with this in Nursery, which suggests to me that it may be something else.
My heart just cant take it any more and I am worried that there is something in the camp that is bothering him but is not being addressed. It is already the second half and he is not happy to go. When I pick him up he is unenthusiastic and just wants to go home. When we get home he is usually very moody until it is time to go to bed.
My husband and I would ask the Morah what is going on and she says that she doesnt know and he is having a blast throughout the day. She would send pictures and videos of him playing.
This camp came highly recommended to us and everyone who we speak to about it says that it is great. But at this point, I am very seriously thinking of leaving him home for the next 4 weeks because I am worried that this may be emotionally damaging for him. But I know at home he will be terribly bored.

Any suggestions?

MadameX

Thu, Aug 11 2016, 7:28 am

glamourmom wrote:

maybe you can wait around at drop off until he's settled and distracted and then say good bye. not sure if you have time for that in the morning but he may feel that you're not abandoning him.

obviously, this can only work if there's nothing bad going on there.

DH tried that in the beginning and it didn't help. And for some reason, teachers seem to be really into the "get out ASAP because you are only making it harder for the child".

myym

Thu, Aug 11 2016, 8:25 am

Keep him home if you have that option. I have the same problem with my 4 yr old. But he explains what he doesn't like and I speak to the counselor. Without knowing what the problem is I would definitely keep him home. Who knows that is going on there?? Also, I never liked those playgroup that insist the mom leave right away..

Chayalle

Thu, Aug 11 2016, 8:52 am

I ran a summer daycamp for a few years as a teen. I will honestly say that the kids whose Moms hung around for more than a few minutes had the hardest time adjusting.

That being said, there's such a thing as a camp not being the right fit for a particular child, for whatever reason. It can be excellent and not be right. Are there any other options in your area that you could switch to?

If switching is an option, some things to consider are: If this is a big daycamp, would your child do better in a smaller group? Perhaps a quieter setting? Does he have any friends from the school year that go to a particular daycamp, such that he would see a familiar face and be in his comfort zone?

MadameX

Thu, Aug 11 2016, 10:04 am

My DS in general has a harder time transitioning into new situations, so sending him to a different camp at this point is not a good idea.
If it were up to him, he would stay home and be bored. He likes it at home and doesnt mind not having too much entertainment. It is just difficult for me because he tends to get rowdy when he doesn't burn energy.
Maybe, as Chayelle said,it is just not a good fit. It is a small backyard daycamp, which his Nursery teacher said would be best for him since a big camp may be too much of an adjustment.
At this stage, it is too late to try a different place. It just hurts me to see him so miserable and not know what is causing it.
He has made new friends at the camp, he seems to enjoy the activities, there are no bullies as far as I hear. I am stumped. He was so happy at Nursery and now, for whatever reason, he is so sad. Sad