Career options for bright, academic dd.

amother

Babyblue

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 6:11 am

My bright, academic DD14 is a great all-rounder. She is very capable, caring, responsible and pro-active. The problem with being good at most academic subjects is that she doesn't know what she want to be when she grows up.

What careers can you suggest? She does not want anything medical.

ANON as also asking friends IRL Smile

imasinger

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 6:15 am

Why on earth is this a serious discussion now?

She needs time and life experience to figure it all out. Tell her to keep up her academics, and encourage non academic interests, too.

You can revisit the discussion in another 6 years or so. Wink

LisaS

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 6:20 am

To me 14 sounds young to be choosing a career path or even leaning. During the course of high school she can see which courses she enjoys the most and get a better idea of where her heart it.

Do you already know whether she plans to attend a standard 4 year college or a frum-degree program? If a 4 year college then she will have freshman year to decide. If a frum-degree program then I would wait until 11th/12th grades and see what degree options are available.

At this stage I would tell my daughter that she BH will succeed at whatever she chooses so no need to worry about it until closer to the end of high school.

amother

Babyblue

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 8:07 am

I hear what you're saying but she's surrounded by people who all know what they want to be/do and it's something she's started to think about as she's ambitious and wants to work hard toward something. If she's good at everything (more or less), and has to make choices in what she'll study, it certainly helps to have a career path in mind.

I guess my question could also be - Imamothers, what jobs/careers do you or you loved ones have that are good for academic women?

amother

Dodgerblue

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 8:12 am

At 14 I wanted to be a scientist.

At 15 I wanted to be a forensic pyschiatrist.

At 16... well, I don't remember what I wanted to be at 16.

At 17, I wanted to be a whistleblower and expose the abuse of women in patriarchal societies.

At 18, I decided I wanted to be a psychologist.

I got my BA in psychology and got accepted to a prestigious university for my masters, but in the meantime I interned at a creative agency where I found a career I loved, and that's what I do today.

No need for her to limit herself now to one path. Interests change, new passions can arise, new vistas discovered. Now is the age to explore, not to settle on a career and base a path on that.

imasinger

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 8:14 am

I think it's a mistake to encourage this too much, and that whichever of her friends say they know what they want to do, 85% will change their minds before graduation. At least once.

That being said, there are some professions that work better for bright, frum, academically minded girls who also maybe want to keep hours that enable family life.

Before going into a list, does she lean more towards STEM? Writing? Creativity? People? What are her greatest interests?

ally

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 8:17 am

Let her take whatever subjects keep her options as open as possible.
Other than that...14 is really young to be stressing about a life path

cbg

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 9:06 am

The first 2 yrs of college/ university, are basic, almost everyone takes the same English comp, math, history, humanities, etc.
Let her concentrate on taking as many of these as possible in HS.

groovy1224

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 9:36 am

amother wrote:

Her friends don't KNOW what they want to do, they think they know! They're teenagers for crying out loud!

You can be good at a lot of things, but that doesn't mean you'll enjoy all of them. If she finds she enjoys math, she can explore accounting, actuarial studies, etc.

If she's a people person, she can pursue a career in sales, real estate, marketing, etc.

In the sciences there's medicine and nursing (I know you said she's not interested in these, but again, she's 14! At 14 I thought I'd die before I wore sweatpants around the house as a married woman yet here I am)

She can become a lawyer, a dentist, a thousand things!!

amother

Goldenrod

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 9:41 am

So many people go to school for one thing and end up doing something totally different - you can only decide finally when trying out. My daughter worked as an assistant with special needs kids then you go for the degree if you feel its for you

amother

Royalblue

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 9:51 am

Instead of trying to figure out a career path now, she should concentrate on doing well in everything, so she can get into a top notch college if that's what she wants to do. Then, it won't matter what she wants to do because those top notch colleges will all have excellent programs in whatever it is that she chooses.

trixx

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 10:06 am

What everyone else said.

Besides for that, encourage her to pursue her passions. Encourage hobbies, even silly non academic ones like crafts or collections. Google genius hour for how many forward thinking schools are starting to implement this attitude.

DrMom

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 10:08 am

She is 14. For now, make sure she is challenged in high school, and exposed to as many academic subjects as possible at a high level, esp in subjects she enjoys.

Rubber Ducky

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 10:57 am

In yeshivish circles I see many — most — girls pursuing "flavor of the month" majors, a glut of frum girls in too few fields, lack of (perceived) choice, and early burn-out. At 14, exposure to different academic career possibilities would be a way to begin clarifying your daughter's choices.

Encourage her interests and passions, even those that don't immediately seem to lead to a career. Does her high school offer any internships or special programs? For example, Bnos Yisroel in Baltimore has internships at NIH: http://www.jewishworldreview.c......php3

amother

Babyblue

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 1:58 pm

groovy1224 wrote:

OK so this is the thing. Is there a list somewhere of every possible career and a brief outline of what it involves? All of the careers you've mentioned above I'm familiar with, but there are s many other jobs, I want to know what they all are so that she can think about them. I'm not being at all pushy chas vesholom, I just know what it feels like to be bright without direction. I was always told I am intelligent and the right thing will come my way, so I never chased after anything specific and when I graduated I drifted from one thing to the next, no real direction. There may have been many things that would have suited me, but I never knew what was out there.

animeme

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 2:08 pm

amother wrote:

OK, it makes more sense now why you are worried. But she's not up to this yet. Career counselors do this, in college.

I agree with the post above about getting her requirements done in high school. This serves the double purpose of challenging her with higher level work. As the years go and the subjects come, she may look on to something. If she expresses some interest, even if it's just because she likes it but isn't sure it's IT, you can help her get an internship or shadow someone. If she comes home from seminary with no idea, she can start talking to her college's career counselor then.

Girls today are encouraged to be career minded earlier. I don't think she'll have the problem you did. Although I think we need a spinoff: What did you want to do when you were in high school, and what do you do now?

kollel wife

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 2:09 pm

You can get a book in the library - for example - for baby names (all possibilities) and all possible careers with a short description - I think that will help you!!

Maybe google that and you won't need the library.

animeme

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 2:11 pm

I must add that if she doesn't want to take AP's, or to be in the top track, that's OK. If she comes home one day and tells you she wants to be a SAHM, that's OK. Be very careful of pushing her toward something you're sure she will want, because you would want it her place. You can let the opportunities be around her to take, but I wouldn't push too hard.

Last edited by animeme on Thu, Oct 13 2016, 2:13 pm; edited 1 time in total

debsey

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 2:12 pm

Why not let her intern somewhere this summer? Like a law office, a grant-writing agency, a special needs school, a newspaper, an advertising agency - somewhere a bit out of the box - and let her see what the day-to-day life of a working person in one of those fields is like. Even if she doesn't find her calling, she'll have a great experience to write about in her college application essays, expand her horizons a bit, and at worst, she'll know what she definitely does NOT want to do.

amother

Aquamarine

Thu, Oct 13 2016, 2:30 pm

I find it unusual that so many people had a negative reaction to the fact that a 14 year old is trying to figure out what to be when she grows up. All kids think about this to some extent, and it is healthy and normal. Obviously, she won't make a final decision now, but as someone who spent most of my childhood trying to figure out what I would be when I grew up, it's comforting, exciting, and goal-orienting to try to help guide where you want your life to go. Some teenagers spend all their time thinking about what kind of guy they want to marry, or what they're perfect wedding would be like, or where they want to go to college, or how many kids they want to have. Obviously, at 14 (or at anytime), you can't decide how many kids you'll have or who you will marry or what perfect or not perfect seminary you will go to. But you can plan and dream and that's a good thing. If she wants to think about where she wants to get to in life, then good for her, and you should encourage her to explore her interests and ideas. And she may or may not change her mind 20 times, and that's fine too and very normal - figuring yourself out and making decisions about your life is part of growing up and becoming your best self. "I changed my mind a thousand times, I think it works better now".

I recommend that she ask her friends' parents and your friends what they do for a living and why they like it and what's hard about it. Just a few minutes discussion with several working adults will give her somewhere to start. And if anything catches her fancy, encourage her to volunteer, intern, or shadow someone in the field during a vacation, even for just a few days. This is what I did as a teenager - not only did it give me ideas about jobs, but hearing about what people liked about their jobs and what was hard about their jobs also helped me figure out what I was looking for in a job. For instance, I never wanted to sit at a desk all day - someone I spoke to said he liked that his job is dynamic, he does several different thing over the course of the week and that keeps him interested.

Also, she doesn't have to limit her search to academic fields. One really all-around academically good girl in my high school class did very well in all subjects and was very smart, and then went on to be an event organizer - some people thought it was a waste of her brains, but it's such a good job for her because she is so creative, detail-oriented, organized and is great with people - it uses so many of her talents and she is happy with it. So don't only focus on academic careers. Help your daughter make a list of her strengths in general in life - this can guide her as well. For example, I'm very smart and medically oriented, but extremely introverted. Being a doctor was therefore not a good option for me. But, being a research scientist is a great job for me. Both jobs involve similar skills in terms of intelligence and analytical thinking, but I would have been miserable in the day to day life as a doctor because I prefer to focus on my work and my thoughts and not talk to too many people. These external factors can make or break job satisfaction as much as, or even more than, whether the job is in an interesting field or intellectually stimulating.

And in 10 or so years, I expect to see a post saying what she ended up being when she grew up Smile