2 yr old refuses to go to bed, and sleep through the night

amother

Mustard

Wed, Oct 19 2016, 7:08 pm

Don't ask me how we got here. But here we are. I dread bedtime, and it's affecting my relationship with my son for the whole day, not just bedtime.
He knows how to climb out of his crib so we switched him to a toddler bed. But even before the bed, he was giving us trouble with going to sleep, but now it's even worse. It's really hard to get him to bed before 9-10 pm, and even once he's in bed, he wakes up between 11:30-1:30 at night and insists on coming into bed with us. Aaarrggghhhhh I am so frustrated!
The only thing that worked in the past (when he was younger) is cry it out, and it worked great for him, but now I can't let him cry it out because he'll just leave his room. (He can jump over any baby gate, and I refuse to lock him into his room, I think it's dangerous.)
What on earth am I supposed to do??????

amother

Vermilion

Wed, Oct 19 2016, 8:29 pm

This is mostly a cut and paste of what I wrote in reply to someone whos 2 year old kept climbing out of the crib:

A few ideas to help keep him in the crib

-----------Theres a clock with pictures that can let a toddler know when its ok to come out of bed. some people find it really works, and although it didn't work for mine - it might be worth a try for your kid.
-----------You can try pjs with webbed feet - the kid can move his feet around, but to separate them far apart by putting one foot over the railing doesn't work. I tried that, and my dc was so upset, plus somehow was climbing up by pushing up on hands so it made it really dangerous so this didn't work for my kid.
----------- Sometimes you can take the springs out of the crib so the mattress is much lower, and then the kid cant climb out. Also make sure there's nothing - no toys and ect... that he can use to step on
-----------You can also try turning the crib around - if you have one of those cribs were one side is higher then the other - put the lower side and one of the end against the wall, and put a higher dresser by the other end.
------------What about a taller gate by his room? (we have a regular one but put it up a drop higher - so its taller. We made sure the space on the bottom was just small enough that my son cant stick his head there and get stuck c'v. (if you don't like the idea of him being confined to his room, if you have a hallway, you can put it there - at least then he wont get to far)
------------just being consistent in putting him back to bed might work - every time he comes back pick him up calmly and put him back into bed. After a few nights of doing it a ton of times, hopefully it will slowly lessens as he realizes that there's no point in coming out because he will be put right back in (you just have to be really good about it - if he sees every few times he comes out, mommy is busy so lets him stay up for a little till he could be put back to bed, he'll keep trying since he knows eventually he can stay up a little. or if at night he sees that sometimes mommy puts him back to bed but once in a while is just to tired , he will keep trying since he knows eventually he may be allowed to stay)
------------- for in middle of the night - I don't know if you want to allow him in your room at all, but if your ok with it, you can have a designed mat/carpet or ect... on the floor and train him that this is were he could sleep if he comes into mommy's room and your bed is off-limits. toddlers usally do better if they have a choice - ex either mommy's rug or your own bed - since they feel in control

Till you work out a situation - its best not to leave things out that are dangerous- this age doesn't really understand danger yet. keep sharp knives, medication.... locked (or just get a lock on the outside of the kitchen door and bathroom door and lock it at night) something that makes noise when ds goes out of the room is a good idea. I think they also make sensors that can alert you of that although that probably cost a nice amount.... As you can tell, I've had a lot of experience with this. It will pass eventually even though it doesn't feel like it now. Good luck.

amother

cornflower

Thu, Oct 20 2016, 7:42 am

We use the OK to Wake Clock (search on amazon) - we use bribes in conjunction with the clock. Works great for our daughter since she was around 2 or 2.5, but she is a good sleeper.

But, you may have to use a more drastic measures - I recommend reading the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Weissbluth - this is how we got our daughter to be a good sleeper in the first place. He uses cry it out for babies, but other methods for toddlers. His methods really work - you'll likely have a few miserable nights getting him to stay in bed using the methods in the book, but only a few and then it will be fine.

I think he does recommend locking the door, which I also won't do, but You can also get 2 or 3 gates and put up one on top of the other until there isn't enough room at the top to climb out. But, the second (and third) should be screwed in to the door frame to be safe, in case he tries to climb it. Even if you aren't willing to do that, the book will still help you.

Good luck.