How can I get my 3yr old to stay in bed and go to sleep???

amother

Coral

Thu, Oct 20 2016, 10:47 pm

I've tried everything I could think of (charts, consequences and ect... you name it), but nothing works. This is turning into a nightly problem and I'm afraid I'm going to lose it with him. Its almost 11 and he's still up (I put him to bed at 7) He doesn't nap so why is he not just going to sleep???

cholenteater

Fri, Oct 21 2016, 1:24 am

Sound really challenging!
This may be helpful- ok to wake clock
It's a clock that turns colors when it is ok to go out. I found that the child feels secure knowing that now is not the time- the child can look at the clock for reassurance, instead of coming out to see if it's the morning yet. This won't help with the actual falling asleep but may help in the morning, and help him stay in his room until he goes to sleep.

Have you done a stool test? Bloodwork? Ruled out any medical reasons?

Another thing may be sensory overload/ too little sensory expereinces. An o.t. can advise you, depending on what other syptoms your child exhibits. Many children benefit from a weighted blanket, which helps the child feel calm/have sensory input and go to bed.

Would you try a white noise machine or a singing machine?

Do you have a consistent bedtime routine?

amother

Lime

Fri, Oct 21 2016, 6:58 am

See this similar thread from just a few days ago: http://www.imamother.com/forum.....05817

Here's what I posted there:

We use the OK to Wake Clock (search on amazon) - we use bribes in conjunction with the clock. Works great for our daughter since she was around 2 or 2.5, but she is a good sleeper.

But, you may have to use a more drastic measures - I recommend reading the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Weissbluth - this is how we got our daughter to be a good sleeper in the first place. He uses cry it out for babies, but other methods for toddlers. His methods really work - you'll likely have a few miserable nights getting him to stay in bed using the methods in the book, but only a few and then it will be fine.

I think he does recommend locking the door, which I also won't do, but You can also get 2 or 3 gates and put up one on top of the other until there isn't enough room at the top to climb out. But, the second (and third) should be screwed in to the door frame to be safe, in case he tries to climb it. Even if you aren't willing to do that, the book will still help you.

Good luck.

amother

Coral

Fri, Oct 21 2016, 9:15 am

Thanks everyone. Ds finally fell asleep at 12 and is still sleeping now since he went to sleep so late. This is fine since there no school but is big problem otherwise....

pesek zman wrote:

Can you gate off his room?

I'm guessing he'd wake the baby if he were stuck in the room with her. I could let him sleep in my room at the start of the night but don't think a gate is so practical since I'd need to be able to close my door every night. I can get a lock for the outside of the door but would feel terrible doing that. Or does that seem ok to do?

zigi wrote:

did he always have trouble falling asleep? did you try at a later time? melaton
in, soothing sound or music?

Never tried Melaton. What is it exactly? does it have side effect and ect.... A soothing sound is a good idea. I actually have not tried that with him.

cholenteater & Lim amother - I've tired the clock when ds was younger but it didn't work, I suppose it doesn't hurt to give it another try now that he is older
Would type of medical reason can there be for staying up?
Thanks for the book recommendation. Will check it out.

amother

Lawngreen

Fri, Oct 21 2016, 9:19 am

Get a tall baby gate. He will get bored and tired more quickly. Melatonin will help but it hasn't been studied enough long term. Ask your pediatrician before you use and give with a tiny dose like an eighth or quarter of mg. That is most effective

cholenteater

Fri, Oct 21 2016, 11:02 am

When you rule out any medical reasons then you can sleep train knowing that there is no medical reason for discomfort. (This can include ear infections, pandas or celiac etc) after my son had tubes put in, he went to sleep much faster as his ears where not bothering him.

What do you think is your son's needs /love language? For me, I found that the days that I consiously give him more positive attention and touch (hugs etc) he goes to sleep much quicker! If I see he is not winding down I'll give him a short back rub, or we will play a tickle game. The point is to get in more physical touch time.

I'm having a different problem with my three-year-old right now. He goes to sleep nicely but then wakes up in middle of the night.... any ideas? I'm thinking I need to try a different pullup brand where he won't feel so wet so he won't be woken up. The ok to wake clock doesnt work when he is disoriented in the middle of the night and is calling for me. I'm up for suggestions Smile

maybe I should make another thread. Just wanted you to know that you are not alone!

allthingsblue

Fri, Oct 21 2016, 11:12 am

Don't use melatonin unless advised to by a doctor!
I am also going through a hard time getting my child to go to bed and stay sleep, but as tempted as you might be- don't do it without a trusted doctor's approval. It can be harmful to your child.

mha3484

Fri, Oct 21 2016, 2:29 pm

How long has it been going on? Some kids have a hard time with changes in schedule for yomtov and will get back to routine after its all over. I find the fall really hard in general. Between changing from camp to school and all the holidays the kids don't have a lot of consistency. I just try and get through it and breathe when its November.