Lately I just want everyone to leave me alone.

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 10:25 am

My kids, DH....I don't feel like talking all the time. I'm frequently irritated by my kids and DH and just want QUIET and alone time. This is relatively new. I don't have a big family but I feel like I burned out on parenting and no alone time is ever enough. Am I suddenly an introvert? I feel like I tolerate all these interactions but don't enjoy them. For the record, I interact with children all day at work.... I feel like I have nothing left for my family.

Lady Bug

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 10:30 am

Do you have some downtime between work and the kids?

Try to schedule a set time for "me time" where you can be alone and do something you like. Preferably every day, but otherwise as often as you can.

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 10:53 am

Lady Bug wrote:

Not at all possible until after 8:30 when kids are asleep.

imasinger

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 11:05 am

You're not a sudden introvert.

You're getting burned out.

Time to program in some regular time for yourself. It's not just a nice thing. It's a necessity.

Whether you hire a sitter, or get DH to take over, you should have regular stretches of time. Many moms find it best to join a gym or otherwise leave the house, as those bubble baths tend to get interrupted because you're right there.

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 11:10 am

imasinger wrote:

I get a few hours on Friday. That's all I can do. DH gets home late. We both work Sundays. I have no family nearby. Maybe once every few weeks I'll get a sitter to handle bedtime and leave, but can't pay for more than that. Paying my bills is a "necessity."

imasinger

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 11:13 am

Can you work out a trade with a friend? Each of you alternates taking an hour off one day, and watching the other one's kids for an hour the next.

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 11:26 am

imasinger wrote:

Can you work out a trade with a friend? Each of you alternates taking an hour off one day, and watching the other one's kids for an hour the next.

No. we are all burned out with different schedules and none of us want to deal with one another's' kids.

cinnabuns

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 12:34 pm

amother wrote:

No. we are all burned out with different schedules and none of us want to deal with one another's' kids.

How old are your kids? Are they old enough to 'watch themselves' for ten minutes so you can have a quiet cup of tea in your room? Are they happy in front of a video for a half hour? Can you institute quiet play every day for a half hour- there are many resources on line that can give you ideas of toys that will occupy and help your kids play alone.

It sucks to burn out :/

amother

Gold

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 12:43 pm

I could have written this post I'm in the same situation...working with kids all day and coming home to the kids all evening... its really hard. So I try to do play dates... you say your friends are also burned out, but wouldn't one child's friend's mom want a quiet evening and be willing to do this once a week where you both do one play date? It makes such a big difference for me. No such thing as a quiet toy... my kids always find what to fight about.
Also one more thing that I do is I make a schedule for the after school hours till bedtime. So snack time. Play time. Activity like coloring or cutting or play dough. Suppertime. Baths, bed.

Queen6

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 1:16 pm

Can you switch careers? Burning all your energy at work is a pity.... Maybe if you worked with adults...

thunderstorm

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 3:14 pm

when you reach this point , it's time to just take time for yourself. I tend to want my space from EVERYONE every so often. Sometimes when the kids are in bed I work on a needlepoint, read a good book, watch a DVD, do a crossword puzzle, do my scrap booking etc. in a room with closed doors so NOBODY bothers me. I also put headphones on and listen to music while I do any of those things. It's ok for dishes to be in the sink and that not all the kids get a bath. You need to give yourself all the love you can give. After you fill your own needs then you can think of taking care of everyone else. Kindly ask DH if you can have an hour while holds up the fort so that you can have some "me" time. You just need to recharge.

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 3:23 pm

Queen6 wrote:

Can you switch careers? Burning all your energy at work is a pity.... Maybe if you worked with adults...

Um, NO. You don't just leave a job like mine. But per other posters above, I can do a video and other diversions for a few minutes here and there. I just feel like I need HOURS.

thunderstorm

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 3:33 pm

amother wrote:

Um, NO. You don't just leave a job like mine. But per other posters above, I can do a video and other diversions for a few minutes here and there. I just feel like I need HOURS.

Right now you are running on empty. But as you fill your tank up , by doing things for yourself, you will be able to run more efficiently and you won't feel that need for hours and hours. You would benefit greatly if you can just take a break for the day and just be by yourself and indulge in just doing enjoyable things with yourself. But if that's not possible at least allocate some time each day and you will feel that much better. Been there done that!

yksraya

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 4:15 pm

Maybe taking a little vacation or staycation is what you really need now.
Send the kids away to a babysitter or neighbors/friends for a day or 2. I know it may be pricey, but it's money well spent. Look at it as an investment.

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Nov 24 2016, 4:47 pm

yksraya wrote:

Thank you. May try to do this at some point. Right now I make the most of the time I have with AND without my kids - it's all good and I know that, but yes - I often feel fried!