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Husband and wife coordinating--cute or tacky
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amother
Pumpkin


 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:12 pm
My husband and I will be at an event and there will professional pictures. I'm wearing a navy dress and he's wearing a grey suit. I was going to get him a blue/grey tie to match, but his parents got him a red tie and he wants to wear that. Will it look weird if we don't match/coordinate at all or is coordinating tie/dress tacky?
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MagentaYenta




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:14 pm
IMHO adults coordinating is tacky.
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glamourmom




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:15 pm
I think it's cute. he's wearing an accessory that coordinates with your dress. I like it. but I wouldn't make a fuss if he's set on wearing something else.
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chavs




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:20 pm
So tacky, so very tacky!
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nicole81




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:26 pm
I don't think a coordinating tie is tacky. It probably won't even strike people that the tie is purposefully coordinated.

I also think a navy patterned tie would look much better with a gray suit than a red one. And, I think it would be in a husband's best interest to wear a tie his wife bought him over one that his parents did.
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:29 pm
I think it's cute!
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OOTforlife




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:31 pm
The colors you're contemplating are so commonly mixed and matched anyway (navy, grey, red) that I don't think any combination of those would look like conspicuous coordination or clashing. If you were wearing a magenta dress and he wore a magenta and turquoise tie or something, it would be totally different.
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debsey




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:34 pm
I think it's tacky when obvious, and contributes to a more harmonious look in a picture when it's subtle.
Like, if she's wearing a magenta dress, and he has a tie made of the same material, that's just too "prom" for adults. I was at a wedding where the girls all wore seafoam green gowns, and all the boys had ties or bowties made of the same material. I thought it looked like a cheesy Broadway show cast.

But if she's wearing gray and his tie has gray in it, the picture just looks more pulled together.
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pesek zman




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:45 pm
I'm in the minority but I love it. Especially for a simcha
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MrsDash




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 2:51 pm
Are you kidding me? My husband IS my accessory! Very Happy
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amother
Pumpkin


 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 3:09 pm
So the "big deal" about this tie was that my husband went shopping with his in-laws for the suit/tie and my step-mother-in-law (who was the "fashion consultant" for the trip) insisted on getting him a "pocket square" to go with his tie--which is in the same matching maroon--not red, for this formal occasion. My dress, purchased more recently, is ALL blue/silver. I'm generally big on "coordinating for pictures" and the idea that we are not wearing ANY of the same colors is kind of irking me. Should I let this go?
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agreer




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 3:34 pm
amother wrote:
So the "big deal" about this tie was that my husband went shopping with his in-laws for the suit/tie and my step-mother-in-law (who was the "fashion consultant" for the trip) insisted on getting him a "pocket square" to go with his tie--which is in the same matching maroon--not red, for this formal occasion. My dress, purchased more recently, is ALL blue/silver. I'm generally big on "coordinating for pictures" and the idea that we are not wearing ANY of the same colors is kind of irking me. Should I let this go?


Yes.
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Fox




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 3:38 pm
debsey wrote:
I think it's tacky when obvious, and contributes to a more harmonious look in a picture when it's subtle.


Thumbs Up

Of course, my husband has the body of Dorian Gray. He has a ton of serious health problems but basically looks like he did 25-30 years ago. I'm just happy if no one says, "What an adorable picture of you and your son!"
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dancingqueen




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 4:02 pm
debsey wrote:
I was at a wedding where the girls all wore seafoam green gowns, and all the boys had ties or bowties made of the same material. I thought it looked like a cheesy Broadway show cast.




Debsey that's the standard for bridesmaids and groomsmen at secular and some MO weddings.

Op, I get liking to be coordinating in pictures. So do you have a red dress? If not you should definitely let it go if its such a big deal to him to wear the maroon tie, since it doesn't really matter and won't look bad in the pictures.
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amother
Black


 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 6:19 pm
MagentaYenta wrote:
IMHO adults coordinating is tacky.


IMHO, married adults coordinating is totally cute. Wink
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Orchid




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 6:21 pm
A man's tie coordinating a wife's dress is cute.
Tacky is when the entire outfit coordinates.
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Mimisinger




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 7:53 pm
I think at a formal event when you're taking pictures, it's not obvious that you're matching, just that you look good together. I would have him wear the navy tie and have him wear the maroon tie another time when you'll be with family, and explain to the step mom that you just wanted pictures that look good. When people go to professional photographers for family shots, they don't usually match, but they do coordinate.

I think it's BEYOND tacky when adults always match (I know people who always match their husband on shabbos- 2 couples! YIKES)
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debsey




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 07 2016, 8:12 pm
Mimisinger wrote:
I think at a formal event when you're taking pictures, it's not obvious that you're matching, just that you look good together. I would have him wear the navy tie and have him wear the maroon tie another time when you'll be with family, and explain to the step mom that you just wanted pictures that look good. When people go to professional photographers for family shots, they don't usually match, but they do coordinate.

I think it's BEYOND tacky when adults always match (I know people who always match their husband on shabbos- 2 couples! YIKES)


The only time it's cute is on Purim. And I used to have co-workers (married couple) who wore matching tacky X-mas sweaters pretty much the whole month of December. It was cute, but you had to know them to find it charming. (Is it totally profiling if I say they worked in IT?! and they met at a Lego convention....)
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amother
Cerulean


 

Post Thu, Dec 08 2016, 3:48 am
OP, is it possible that your issue is not about matching or not, but about who decides what your husband wears?
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amother
Pumpkin


 

Post Thu, Dec 08 2016, 8:37 am
amother wrote:
OP, is it possible that your issue is not about matching or not, but about who decides what your husband wears?


I don't think that's totally it. I mean I guess I would've liked a little say about his tie. These will be professional pictures commerating a special event in our lives, and I want the pictures to look good. I would do a "magenta" type thing, that's too much, but I would've liked if he could wear a blue/gray tie for the pictures.
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