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S/o -Better to get married/divorced than break engagement??
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Iymnok









  


Post  Sat, Dec 24 2016, 2:25 pm
Another question,
If a couple gets engaged with tenoim, then married and divorced with a quiet, private minyan in one day, then could she still marry a kohen since there was no biah?
I'm thinking not.
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amother




Crimson


Post  Sat, Dec 24 2016, 6:41 pm
seeker wrote:
OK, that's really weird. I'm assuming there are other background issues in this story. In what universe is a broken engagement more stigmatized than divorce? People tend to forget an engagement much more quickly than a marriage, especially if they were at the wedding.

Yes major issues with self esteem and an issue with always needing to be the best in looks and stature and worrying what people think.
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ROFL









  


Post  Sat, Dec 24 2016, 7:56 pm
Now she can't marry a Cohen I don't understand the concept. Broken engagement is so much better than a divorce!

quote="Iymnok"]Another question,
If a couple gets engaged with tenoim, then married and divorced with a quiet, private minyan in one day, then could she still marry a kohen since there was no biah?
I'm thinking not.[/quote]
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amother




Gray


Post  Sat, Dec 24 2016, 9:42 pm
amother wrote:
I don't know what people do, but for that reason Chabad does not do thr tanoyim until the day of the chssunoh, so we don't have problems of a broken engagement.

As a Lubavitcher, I had a broken engagement and even without Tenaim it wasn't so simple. There was a formal process in returning gifts and asking mechila. It was a long time ago and I pretty much let my parents deal with it so I don't remember the details. But I think the mechila had a lot to do with future shiddichim.


The asking mechila part is important. There are a number of stories of the Rebbe with couples who could not have children and the Rebbe asked about a broken engagement and told them to ask mechila.
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greenfire









  


Post  Sat, Dec 24 2016, 10:07 pm
I'm an unsure why this conversation keeps coming up ... but have people totally lost their minds ??? divorce is never better than a broken engagement !!!
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imasoftov









  


Post  Sun, Dec 25 2016, 5:48 am
Iymnok wrote:
Another question,
If a couple gets engaged with tenoim, then married and divorced with a quiet, private minyan in one day, then could she still marry a kohen since there was no biah?
I'm thinking not.

If a woman has only gone through erusin but not nissuin, she requires a get, and may not marry a Cohen (Hilchot Issurei Biah 17:18). So it seems to me that biah is irrelevant, if they've been married enough to require a get, she can't marry a Cohen after that.
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