Switch kids schools mid year. Asking parents and teachers

amother

Rose

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 8:52 am

Is it so uncommon? so difficult?

We are forced to move due money constraints.

The school is telling us that we wait for summer but we can't. We dont have an apartment old city.

They are making it sound like its an unheard of wierd thing to do.

Im dealing with enough stress and life challenges.

Is the school being truthful or just trying to put me off because it is inconvenient for them to switch bus routes class lists etc.

I need chizuk and advice.

cnc

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 9:00 am

I wouldn't recommend it unless you have no other option.
The only way I would recommend it is if child is miserable in their old school and the switch may be better. Otherwise it's a very hard adjustment especially in a new city. Do your children know anyone or have any friends in the new school?

seeker

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 9:11 am

It's really hard but you need to look at it in context. If continuing to go to the old school is going to cause a huge amount of stress, and you and the new school can offer a lot of positive attitude and support during the transition, then that may be the best for YOUR family. Transferring midyear is hard but it's not unheard of and it could work. How old are your kids? How do they generally do socially, academically, coping with stress?

amother

Rose

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 9:12 am

On top of all the other angst about this situation I now feel horrible about doing this to my kids.

It's so difficult when you don't have money

They've be been apprehensive but confident about it until now.

If I lose my good cheer they will too.

I feel so sad

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 9:34 am

It's not unheard of.

Kids switch schools mid-year if for some reason the first school is not working out or if the family moves far enough away that the child cannot continue in the original school.

Most families with school-age children try to move over the summer to avoid disruption, but sometimes it can't be helped.

OP, you indicated that you are moving to another city. Is it far enough away that your children must change schools when you move? If it is less than an hour away, perhaps they could finish out the year.

If the new school is full, the administrator will tell you. Class lists and bus schedules can be changed. Did they say what the problem was?

Once the registration at the new school is complete, be sure to give your children a positive view. Let them know about the wonderful _______ at the new school. It would help to meet some kids from their classes ahead of time.

amother

Rose

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 10:03 am

Thank you thank u

the new city is an hour and a half away.

the school is being vague and evasive

my kids happen to be doing very well scholastically [{he one bright spot in my life]

excuse me while I type this with newborn in hand

SixOfWands

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 10:10 am

I'm not really sure what the choice is here.

You're moving an hour and a half away. You apparently do not have the option to wait until the end of the school year. Ergo the kids are changing schools.

No, its not optimal. Yes, it happens, and the kids will adjust. No, the school isn't worried about changing class lists or bus routes; its worried about the fact that you're not going to pay the rest of this year's tuition, which was already budgeted for.

Good luck on your move.

ETA:

Dear School:

As we have already informed you, we will be living Our Town on Date, and Kids will no longer be attending School after Date. In order to smooth the transfer to New School, a copy of all records should be immediately sent to New Principal. We will, of course, pay all tuition and fees until Date.

Our children very much enjoyed their experience at School, and we have been very pleased with their education. We particularly want to thank Rabbi X and Morah Y for helping and inspiring our children this year.

Last edited by SixOfWands on Mon, Jan 09 2017, 10:15 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Slateblue

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 10:12 am

I did the same thing op is doing I had no choice. Ds is a good kid. I thought it would work well. I didn't see why if changing after pesach would be a problem. Fast forward. It was a huge change. I had not anticipated and ds did not do well. The rebbe that year was not invested. No one in the new place cared. They were negative with him from the beginning. Even though I heard great things about them.

Even when he started a new year afterwards he didn't do well. He's in a different school this year and doing so much better. That other school was not a good fit. So all in all I can say if it's a good school it will still be changes. You really never know until you actually do it.

amother

Rose

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 10:18 am

I'm so grateful to all of you who are taking time to respond

For some reason I had it all together and now

I'm just tearing up being overwhelmed and worrying about this too

plus everything else

It's really helpful to hear different perspectives. for some reason it gives me a grip

amother

Brunette

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 10:33 am

It's not unheard of to switch schools midyear. What if someone moved to another state or country. Of course you switch schools.
Of course your school of choice may not have room to accommodate you right now - if that's the case they should tell you directly and not play games. Is there another school choice in your new area?

amother

Papaya

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 10:42 am

Different circumstances, but we had to switch ds mid-year when he was being bullied and the school refused to do anything about it. Best decision we ever made.

Is there a way for your children to spend a day in the new school before the official switch? They'll get to know the layout and some of the kids, and the transition will be easier for them.

33055

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 11:02 am

I have some concrete suggestions.

It is easier for the kids to fit in if they are like the other kids. Is the heskofa different? Is their hairstyle the same? Are there certain trends? I am not a big one for following trends, but it helps the kids with their transition.

Try to find out what the curriculum is and work with them on the transition. If the class is reading a book, have your kids start reading it before they go to school.

Give them treats to hand out to break the ice. Keep this up periodically for a few weeks.

How old are your kids? You can just state a range.

amother

Jetblack

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 11:07 am

Interesting view points from everyone. I am school social worker and I have seen kids do BETTER when switched in the middle of the year. Obviously you need a good school and a good teacher, but if that is in place it can be great. The teacher makes a big deal about welcoming the new student. They will often assign someone from the class as a buddy to make sure the child is included at lunch and recess etc. When they start at the beginning of the year the teacher doesn't know they are new and even if told probably doesn't make a big deal about it because they need to establish their classroom environment etc. They also wont know the class well enough to assign a child to your child to help them feel included. There can be a lot of advantages socially to switching mid year not only negatives.

amother

White

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 11:33 am

Just wondering if you discussed the financial arrangement with the new school. You say they are being evasive. It might be because they are worried about your ability to pay. Is this a possibility?
Best of luck and I hope everything works out for you and your family.

amother

White

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 11:33 am

amother

Slategray

Mon, Jan 09 2017, 11:54 am

amother wrote:

Op hugs to you at this challenging time.
I had to take a
Double take when I saw your post bc Im in a similar situation...
I thank jetblack amother the social worker for her perspective. Thats giving me a lot of comfort.
Hatzlacha