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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Toddlers
amother
Seashell
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 5:32 pm
I am not sending my 2 year old to playgroup next year. Gasp! I'm choosing to send to a small babysitting group where we are comfortable. People tell me I'm crazy and that playgroup is a must at this age. I'm just wondering when sending a 2 year old to a basement with 12-18 other two year olds and 2-3 morahs became a "must" I've been to these playgroups and I just don't see why this is so important. They are essentially babies wondering around. (Which is ok at this age!) but not sure why it HAS to be in big group setting. Not really second guessing my choices (well maybe a little-don't we all😉) Just wondering why this is the norm pretty much across the board at such a young age.
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mommy3b2c
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 5:39 pm
Lol. I'm not sending mine to play group either. And he's not even going to a babysitter. He's staying home with mommy. This is actually one of my per peeves. There are a number of reasons for sending.
1) mom works and it's cheaper then a babysitter
2) mom needs a break
3) people convince themselves that their child is soooooo advanced and so smart and muuuuuust have the socialization
4) people don't think for themselves and they think that's what they should be doing.
5) they're a first time mom and they're excited for their kid to reach the next stage
I personally would feel like a bad mom if I did send my son to play group next year.
Please don't listen to these people. For some reason people feel very important when they talk about how important play group is for kids.
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amother
Mustard
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 5:39 pm
Many people keep their 2 year olds home at that age.
I found a great morah of a playgroup with only 8 kids in the class. She is loving, responsible, lively and seems to really care about the children. She is also very neat. I'm very happy with her, and my son happens to be the type who thrives on learning new things and songs and projects. He comes home and tells me the parsha. So he needed a playgroup. But whatever works for you and your child!
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amother
Seashell
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 5:49 pm
mommy3b2c wrote: | Lol. I'm not sending mine to play group either. And he's not even going to a babysitter. He's staying home with mommy. This is actually one of my per peeves. There are a number of reasons for sending.
1) mom works and it's cheaper then a babysitter
2) mom needs a break
3) people convince themselves that their child is soooooo advanced and so smart and muuuuuust have the socialization
4) people don't think for themselves and they think that's what they should be doing.
5) they're a first time mom and they're excited for their kid to reach the next stage
I personally would feel like a bad mom if I did send my son to play group next year.
Please don't listen to these people. For some reason people feel very important when they talk about how important play group is for kids. |
You are spot on!! Am I the only one who is ok with my 2 year old not learning parsha or making projects? They are babies!!!! If you want to send to a playgroup, go for it! Just don't make it seem like the most important thing at this age and tell me how under stimulated my child will be. Our babysitter is warm and loving and yes does not do projects or circle time. But there is napping, eating, wandering lol and hugs and watching housework lol and I don't understand why this isn't ok anymore.
Ps my child is actually beh bright and has very nice skills, but I still don't think playgroup is a must must.
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MrsDash
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 6:03 pm
My oldest didn't go to playgroup or daycare at all. Kindergarten was her first structured experience. She didn't need it. She was a fairly easygoing kid, and was happy with the arrangement. However, my youngest went to playgroup the moment he turned 2. He's a much harder child to care for. Needs much more stimulation and energy that I just do not possess. He's also very needy, which means this momma needed some chill time or her brain might have spontaneously combusted. My entire paycheck goes towards this arrangement, and I couldn't be more thrilled!
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greenfire
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 6:15 pm
babies should stay babies ... to me there is no difference but in the semantics once you are sending the baby out of the comforts of home
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Queen6
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 6:35 pm
It's just that once you're sending a child out - make sure it's age appropriate.
If a child stays home with Mommy, they can have fun together. If a two year old is stuck is someone else's basement with babies... what is the point? Why NOT choose a playgroup?
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amother
Brown
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 6:40 pm
I run a playgroup for that age. I thinm youre doing good.
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amother
Forestgreen
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 6:46 pm
is you dc 2 now or will be 2 by September. Meaning are we talking about a 2 year old playgroup or a 3 year old one> My daughter is now 2 1/2 she's home with me. I'm contemplating keeping her home next year also.
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Miri7
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 6:58 pm
One thing I've learned as a mom - if you are happy with your childcare decisions don't change them because of what others think!!
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behappy2
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 7:08 pm
If you see your child needs more you can always send later. Playgroup can be overwhelming and stressful. I love your idea of sending to a babysitter.
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amother
Olive
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 7:18 pm
My eldest will be starting school IYH in the fall. Will be 3.5 (missed the cutoff for last year). Never sent to groups except for a handful of times to a friend who ran the group. People think I am crazy but I can't afford it and would rather pay full tuition next year. I taught DC the ABCs, the sounds, recognizes numbers, and working on Aleph Bet now. DC doesn't know the parsha but it's ok, DC is little!
We infantilize our grown kids but push our littlest out the door too quickly. I wonder what that says about us as a society...
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amother
Rose
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 7:23 pm
I send my kids to playgroup because that's the arrangement that works best for our needs. It never occurred to me that this is something I or anyone else "should" be doing. I simply need child care, and certain things that are important to me can only be found in a playgroup setting. And no, my kids are not in a basement. They're in a licensed, legal facility with strict ratios and staff trained in early childhood and CPR.
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amother
Seashell
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 10:56 pm
amother wrote: | I run a playgroup for that age. I thinm youre doing good. |
Op here
Just curious, as a playgroup teacher, why do you think that? I am happy to hear though😉
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amother
Seashell
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 10:57 pm
amother wrote: | is you dc 2 now or will be 2 by September. Meaning are we talking about a 2 year old playgroup or a 3 year old one> My daughter is now 2 1/2 she's home with me. I'm contemplating keeping her home next year also. |
My child will be 2 next year
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amother
Seashell
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 11:00 pm
amother wrote: |
We infantilize our grown kids but push our littlest out the door too quickly. I wonder what that says about us as a society... |
This is so true. Let babies be babies. They have so many years ahead of them of structure.
And let adults be adults too!
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amother
Pumpkin
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Tue, Jan 17 2017, 11:03 pm
I keep mine home till kindergarten. If I wasn't a sahm then I would send out earlier. Ppl say you need to send out they need to go to a play group guess what they don't need to. My kids aren't missing out. We play tapes we sing we daven I'm not so great with doing projects. They help in the house cooking baking making challah. I feel no need to spend the money just because. If there was friction between a mom and kid , mother is under a lot of stress then yes maybe they should send the child out.
Op don't worry enjoy the time spend together.
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amother
Vermilion
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Wed, Jan 18 2017, 12:51 am
I work in a preschool. The 2 year old "classes" are basically expensive babysitting.
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amother
Cerise
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Wed, Jan 18 2017, 1:06 am
I am a playgroup Morah. The age I work with is 2 yr olds.
We learn a lot of stuff, most learning is through play and projects that we make, and circle time. Most of the children love playgroup!
Occasionally though, there is a child who just doesn't love to come, but wishes he/she could just stay home with Mom. When that happens it makes me feel so sad for him/her. I do whatever I can to make them happy, to help create the environment that each child needs, but the fact is that when you have a group of 10-12 adorable sweet little 2yr olds and 2 morahs, there is a lot going on, and it can be a little noisy or overwhelming. the love and care that I can give each child is nowhere near as much as he would be receiving from his mother, one on one. That goes without saying.
In my humble opinion, if you are a SAHM and do not need to send your child out to playgroup, then stop and evaluate: Is my child under-stimulated by me? Does he need more activity and excitement than I seem to be able to offer him? Does he thrive on socialization with other kids? If the answer to all of these is 'yes', then look into playgroup options. If not, why rush it? keep him home if you can! Love him, love him and smother him with your love. Let him play with you, alongside you. Let him cook and bake with you, chat to him while you do the grocery shopping together, go to the library, the playground and toddler groups!
If I wasn't working, I would be keeping my kids home until age 4 or 5 I think!
be the very best mommy you can be!
ETA : the previous poster said she worked in a 2yr old classroom and thinks it was just expensvie babysitting ---- well I dont believe htat all 2 yr old programs are like that. Mine certainly is not just babysitting!
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amother
Seashell
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Wed, Jan 18 2017, 5:48 am
Op here
I am not a sahm. So we are not talking abt sending to playgroup vs staying home with me. I do work and need to send my child out. The comments I get is bec I will be sending my two year old to a small babysitter with a few children (not babies, around the same age) and not a playgroup. Meaning no structured activities no projects no circle times, davening etc. friends say my two year old will be "so bored" "under stimulated" my child is bright, very social and verbal and will love school very much eventually,, but to me a two year old is a baby who just need some warm individual attention more than this stimulation everyone is so busy with and can be just fine at a babysitter.
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