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Frum magazines are attacking sheital weairing women?
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amother
Cerise


 

Post Fri, Jan 20 2017, 8:06 am
PinkFridge wrote:
But a lot of women wear extensions, don't they?


Where I live most women arent wearing ostentatious extensions. Maybe something subtle if they have thin hair or difficult hair.

Those that do pile on the big hair extensions arent on the modest side to begin with usually. Fake long flowing curls/extensions wouldnt be classified under the category of modest. On the contrary.
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cozyblanket




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Jan 20 2017, 1:00 pm
It is great when women cover their hair, however they do it. I don't wear tichels... just can't figure out how to make it work for me, but I think they look very nice (but not too attracting) with casual or dressy outfits. Just wanted to say that.
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amother
Royalblue


 

Post Fri, Jan 20 2017, 2:05 pm
Quote:
I think the reason why Sephardi BTs as a subgroup do typically wear scarves more is likely because
1- their rabbi holds that they are forbidden (as do the majority of the poskim)
2-they are not interested because they don't have that tradition and weren't exposed to it in a positive light growing up
3-they're in general not as concerned with "fitting in"- many are going against the grain of most of their childhood friends and family to become observant, so why try to fit in now? They're not becoming religious for social reasons, but spiritual ones.
I think you just explained me to myself!

Although #1 does not apply, I am FTB - grew up MO so no interest in sheitels, and #3 for sure applies to me. In fact, I was told by my principal in seminary that while a middah of azus (chutzpah?) served me well to break away from my upbringing and not be afraid to be different, it's time to put that middah in my pocket now that I am in seminary : )
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malkacooks




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Feb 01 2017, 12:48 pm
just read this thred and it is fascinating
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melalyse




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Feb 05 2017, 10:07 pm
I'm just trying to understand why anyone would have a problem with someone who chooses to only wear tichels.....
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 06 2017, 8:40 am
melalyse wrote:
I'm just trying to understand why anyone would have a problem with someone who chooses to only wear tichels.....


It could be the militancy and the dissing of people who follow their daas Torah that's off-putting, not the reasoned decision to wear tichels.
And I mentioned this before: I know that "Tichel Tales" has a ring to it. But there are many more options than tichels. There are berets, hats, etc.

ETA to reply to post immediately after mine: I'm not saying anyone here is militant, etc., I'd have to review the thread. But I have come across it elsewhere and that's where the problem comes from.


Last edited by PinkFridge on Mon, Feb 06 2017, 9:03 am; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Ruby


 

Post Mon, Feb 06 2017, 9:00 am
Attacking? I didn't not see it coming across that way. I read magazines that promise that wearing a shpitzel is the way! For them it's THE ultimate way but for my family it's not. Of course it's nice if we all wore tichels but what can we expect from a generation that a married womens shaitel looks better than her hair? Meaning it looks like hair.
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amother
Royalblue


 

Post Mon, Feb 06 2017, 8:39 pm
Someone brought up this question today - how much of the motivation is to be more tz'nuah, and how much to be creative, express ones individuality etc? (And I'm asking myself here too!). And does that depend on how many different scarves and how many different colors are used?
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melalyse




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 06 2017, 9:48 pm
amother wrote:
Someone brought up this question today - how much of the motivation is to be more tz'nuah, and how much to be creative, express ones individuality etc? (And I'm asking myself here too!). And does that depend on how many different scarves and how many different colors are used?

Does it matter - It doesn't say in the Torah the we must cover our hair with human hair wigs. And I think that a lot of people that are creative are also very spiritual.
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nyc123




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 07 2017, 5:06 pm
amother wrote:
Someone brought up this question today - how much of the motivation is to be more tz'nuah, and how much to be creative, express ones individuality etc? (And I'm asking myself here too!). And does that depend on how many different scarves and how many different colors are used?


How much of the motivation of getting highlights, bangs, or styling a wig with waves vs straight hair is to be more tznuah and how much to express one's individuality? I think that in any area, there is a natural human tendency to want to express our individuality.
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amother
Blush


 

Post Tue, Feb 07 2017, 6:50 pm
An extra madreiga in tznius should come from something inside us that wants to grow, that is ready for something bigger, and when a person feels very secure and comfortable with who they are. It shouldn't come from an article in a magazine, an inspirational story or speech.

A couple of years ago I was married to a guy whose family was frummer or more chassidish than mine. A few of his siblings covered their sheitel. They all wore short synthetic wigs and I felt like the [gentile]. And then I heard this inspirational speech and I cut my sheitel shorter but it wasn't the right thing for me. Today I am remarried and dress modestly but probably very modern according to my ex's family but I feel much more at peace. I am growing from within instead of from outside of me. If that makes sense at all.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 07 2017, 6:56 pm
amother wrote:
An extra madreiga in tznius should come from something inside us that wants to grow, that is ready for something bigger, and when a person feels very secure and comfortable with who they are. It shouldn't come from an article in a magazine, an inspirational story or speech.

A couple of years ago I was married to a guy whose family was frummer or more chassidish than mine. A few of his siblings covered their sheitel. They all wore short synthetic wigs and I felt like the [gentile]. And then I heard this inspirational speech and I cut my sheitel shorter but it wasn't the right thing for me. Today I am remarried and dress modestly but probably very modern according to my ex's family but I feel much more at peace. I am growing from within instead of from outside of me. If that makes sense at all.


I believe in internal growth. But can't it come from what we nourish ourselves with? If we have mentors in our lives who write and teach regularly, we shouldn't read and listen to what they want to say?

We don't have to accept everything. We can store for future reference, we can think and make informed decisions. On our own, no one's telling us to do something, but we can value the thoughts and opinions of others.
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amother
Blush


 

Post Tue, Feb 07 2017, 7:54 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
I believe in internal growth. But can't it come from what we nourish ourselves with? If we have mentors in our lives who write and teach regularly, we shouldn't read and listen to what they want to say?

We don't have to accept everything. We can store for future reference, we can think and make informed decisions. On our own, no one's telling us to do something, but we can value the thoughts and opinions of others.


I guess since I am naturally a spiritual person I don't gain anything from these types of things. Maybe other ppl do need a little push. Learning is very important and I constantly seek out guidance. But each person has to ask themselves before they take on something new if this is coming from am emotional, inspiring place or from a grounded, centered place.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Feb 08 2017, 9:18 am
amother wrote:
I guess since I am naturally a spiritual person I don't gain anything from these types of things. Maybe other ppl do need a little push. Learning is very important and I constantly seek out guidance. But each person has to ask themselves before they take on something new if this is coming from am emotional, inspiring place or from a grounded, centered place.


This is the way I heard chumra, which is pretty much the idea of taking on something new, explained. One really has to learn the sugya and then decide if it's appropriate. Now if one wants eitzos from people s/he respects, that's another thing, but the decision is hers or his.

I guess we differ on what leads us to even think of making the decision. I figure, one has to be exposed to the idea first and how is one exposed?
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amother
Gray


 

Post Wed, Feb 08 2017, 4:05 pm
amother wrote:
Someone brought up this question today - how much of the motivation is to be more tz'nuah, and how much to be creative, express ones individuality etc? (And I'm asking myself here too!). And does that depend on how many different scarves and how many different colors are used?


I think this is an interesting point. Personally, if I ever decided to stop wearing a sheitel, I would not be switching to artistically wrapped tichels in various colors. Nothing to do with a tzniyus concern, but rather because I have very little artistic or fashion sense. It takes enough effort for me to pull together a relatively put together clothing wardrobe, and I would not be interested in then trying to put together matching tichels. Besides, I feel that one needs at least a bit of artistic flair to pull off that look.

Much of what I have read on the topic of giving up sheitels in favor of tichels seems to emphasize the fashionable and creative element of it. So I guess I wonder if someone who gives up sheitels and wears mostly neutral (think black, navy, gray etc) pre-tieds or snoods would fit into the tichel-wearing crowd, as well as whether people who are impressed by tichel-wearers would feel the same towards someone like this.
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rainbow dash




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Feb 08 2017, 5:11 pm
In this weeks Family First in the letter to the editor someone who wears both tichels and wigs wrote an amazing answer. One sentence stands out in her letter, "We do not need to police the world with what we feel is the best way of doing things".
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AZmom09




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 16 2017, 11:31 am
Funny you say that. We just did a whole Sheitel issue for Bayis Magazine. You can see it here and we have some of the articles on our website as well- http://bayismagazine.com/past-issues/
Scroll down a bit the sheitel issue is there.
There is an incredible story in there around hair covering and how someone was saved because of it. Oh and she wears a stunning long sheitel. At the end of the day, if that is how you are covering your hair, go for it. It it works for you, great!
I was also told that apparently magazines like ami, binah, mishpacha...dont show long sheitels like we did here. I guess you can't make everyone happy either.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Feb 16 2017, 12:42 pm
AZmom09 wrote:
Funny you say that. We just did a whole Sheitel issue for Bayis Magazine. You can see it here and we have some of the articles on our website as well- http://bayismagazine.com/past-issues/
Scroll down a bit the sheitel issue is there.
There is an incredible story in there around hair covering and how someone was saved because of it. Oh and she wears a stunning long sheitel. At the end of the day, if that is how you are covering your hair, go for it. It it works for you, great!
I was also told that apparently magazines like ami, binah, mishpacha...dont show long sheitels like we did here. I guess you can't make everyone happy either.


Hey, I forgot all about your magazine since your first issue. I'm going to check it out and see if there's any way to subscribe.
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