Marrying a stepbrother

amother

Chocolate

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 6:46 pm

How weird/odd/crazy/normal is it when a second marriage couple marries one's son to the other's daughter?

Cmon be nice

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 6:49 pm

The chofetz Chaim married his stepsister (1st marriage, I think)

Fox

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 6:53 pm

One of my DD's friends married her stepbrother in just such a situation. They're a darling couple, though they have to put up with a lot of jokes about the fact that at least their parents get along.

The biggest halachic issue, to my knowledge, was that the boy had to make sure he didn't live in the same house as the girl at any time.

out-of-towner

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 6:54 pm

It happens. It used to happen more ( when marrying a cousin was also normal), but it's fine Halachically.

cozyblanket

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:04 pm

Fox wrote:

You mean from the time they get engaged? or if they ever lived under one roof, they are now never allowed to marry each other in the future? Just wondering.

cnc

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:04 pm

I know several couples like this but in all of the situations the parents married each other AFTER the children were married to each other. (So basically machatunim married each other)

FranticFrummie

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:06 pm

A few years ago I read a story about two unrelated orphans who were adopted and grew up together. When they were 18/19, they wanted to get married to each other.

The rabbis went around and around, and eventually they decided that there was absolutely nothing against halacha about it. Odd, yes, but not incestuous.

amother

Khaki

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:07 pm

cnc- I have a friend like that also. Her husband liked to make jokes about it.

amother

Chocolate

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:07 pm

cnc wrote:

I know several couples like this but in all of the situations the parents married each other AFTER the children were married to each other. (So basically machatunim married each other)

Wow. Interesting.

tichellady

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:09 pm

I know a couple like this. You have to feel very comfortable the marriage will work out, otherwise it can be very awkward in terms of family dynamics 😔

amother

Vermilion

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:12 pm

Just be aware that should an issue come up in the younger kids marriage, it can make the parents shalom bayis a sticky situation.

amother

Mauve

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:12 pm

I liked my stepbrother very much and inquired about dating him. He thought about it and turned me down. He ended up marrying a good friend of mine instead. There was no halachic issue; he just didn't want to do it for whatever reason.

amother

Ivory

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:16 pm

My great grandfather was an orphan. His father died at the beginning of the pregnancy and his mother not long after childbirth. He was raised by his father's brother and ended up marrying their daughter.

amother

Red

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:19 pm

cnc wrote:

I know several couples like this but in all of the situations the parents married each other AFTER the children were married to each other. (So basically machatunim married each other)

My cousin did this - their parents married each other after they got married. Then my cousin got divorced. It was super awkward.

amother

Purple

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:20 pm

cnc wrote:

I know several couples like this but in all of the situations the parents married each other AFTER the children were married to each other. (So basically machatunim married each other)

I know a couple like this, and the children ultimately got divorced. Sad

But the parent couple is an amazing match.

amother

Mint

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:24 pm

out-of-towner wrote:

It happens. It used to happen more ( when marrying a cousin was also normal), but it's fine Halachically.

The Rebbish do it all the time. Cousins marrying. My friend (Rebbish) actually married her third cousin and they got divorced it was so sad. But I dont want to start a whole discussion about Rebbish people because it is none of our business.

cnc

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:37 pm

amother wrote:

My cousin did this - their parents married each other after they got married. Then my cousin got divorced. It was super awkward.

Ouch

agreer

Sun, Jan 22 2017, 7:57 pm

I know of two couples like this... their parents got remarried to each other while they were in elementary/high school, and they got married after.

They seem happy B"H.

I think it's so weird, but what does it matter what I think so long as they are happy.