Baby getting fussier, losing my sanity!

amother

Seafoam

Tue, Jan 31 2017, 12:29 pm

He's nearly 4 months. If I'm not holding him walking round the house he screams so loudly - not a pain cry, an offended type cry! My first never did this, I can tell already this one is so strong willed and it's so difficult! He was great until a few weeks ago when his personality started coming out shock

I just literally put him on his play mat and let him cry because I can't do it anymore.I am meant to be working from home and he's impossible to deal with. Nothing keeps him quiet for even a second, even babywearing doesn't help - he hates it. He takes ages to settle for naps, then wakes very quickly. I know all about baby sleep etc. He hates his swaddle one minute and loves it the next. I fight to get him to sleep enough. The awake fussing is driving me insane. If you take away something he is looking at, he screams, if you sit down, he screams. Arghh help me!

mha3484

Tue, Jan 31 2017, 12:39 pm

My two month is like this. I was at the ped for something else and she heard how much gas he was passing and suggested that I give him probitotics. She suggested either gerber soothe or florastor. It made a huge difference. He sleeps much better and is a lot less cranky.

miami85

Tue, Jan 31 2017, 12:43 pm

I've heard from an experienced mother than the fussy period peaks around 12 wks, but should get easier. With many babies I've experienced that they have a "built-in altimeter"--they can tell when the person is holding them standing or not. It could be colic, I recommend gripe water from experience. I thought it made burping easier and less gassy. Have you tried rocking in a stroller/swing?

ectomorph

Tue, Jan 31 2017, 12:47 pm

My 6 months old has this personality. I can't wait to sleep train him. Have to wait for various reasons.

Try baby wearing.

Also I hope I don't get attacked as a terrible mother but if he's fed, changed, has a toy to swat at I think you're allowed to put him down for half hour say twice a day. He's allowed to complain.

ectomorph

Tue, Jan 31 2017, 12:49 pm

Oops I missed the baby wearing part. In my defense I'm holding a fussy baby right now

cinnabuns

Tue, Jan 31 2017, 1:09 pm

When my baby got fussy and unhappy, I upped her bottles and nursing times, and she was a bit happier to be put down.. 4 -6 months they are aware enough to be interested in things but too young to play with or crawl over.. it's a tough stage

I also would put her down and then interacting with her on the floor when she kvetched. After a while she realized I wasn't picking her up and learned to play

amother

Amber

Wed, Feb 01 2017, 2:16 pm

I notice yo usay that you are working from home. SOme babies need more attention than others. The situation of you working from home and having a fussy baby means that your baby feels like he's not getting enough attention. You need to get a babysitter - it's not fair to your baby otherwise, and also not fair to you if you are trying to work. Some babies are just more demanding like this than others.

amother

Seafoam

Mon, Feb 06 2017, 2:51 am

It seems to be getting even worse. Maybe it's teething - he's biting his hands a lot. I tried acamol but it didn't do anything.

I just left him to cry for ten minutes and he cried himself to sleep. My nerves get so bad I have to leave him alone, the screaming makes me feel so angry. I feel like the worst mom in the world. I don't even believe in doing CIO when I sleep train.

Unfortunately I have no choice but to work from home. The cost of a babysitter will be almost the same as what I earn. Although it doesn't make much difference, if I play with him - he is happy for maybe 5 minutes. Carrying him round helps a little sometimes - but my back hurts so much - he is really heavy.

Add my toddler who gets annoyed when I'm not paying attention to him (he's only home in the afternoons thank goodness) and I am starting to dread every day.

DH helps when he is home most evenings and does the last hour before baby goes down to sleep at 8.30pm - but apart from that it's just hours of misery where I feel so on edge from all the noise - nerves are totally shot. And today of all days he's out until 8.30. It's only 10 am and I've already been crying. never mind the baby!

Culturedpearls

Mon, Feb 06 2017, 3:10 am

Sending you hugs. It's very frustrating.
I really recommend a baby swing. It was a lifesaver for my kids & now grandkids.
I did keep to a schedule of going to sleep at set times during the day & the whole bath, feed, bed routine.
And while it's really discouraged now any baby who at that age couldn't sleep or settle & didn't like swaddling I would put on the stomach to sleep.
Like others have said, it's ok for him to cry if he's been fed, cleaned & played with. It could be his personality. One of mine was like this & nothing has changed in over 20 years !

amother

Amber

Mon, Feb 06 2017, 3:13 am

If he fell asleep on his own after only 10 minutes of crying, that's fantastic! At 4 months, 10-15 minutes of crying before sleep is normal and often necessary (some babies cry for short periods like this before falling asleep, and that's the only way they can fall asleep at first), and it is perfectly ok to let him to do that at this age - we did it with our daughter and she became a fantastic sleeper in a very short period of time. If he can learn to fall asleep on his own this way, you should let him. It will keep him less cranky when awake and keep you more sane. I know it's hard to listen to the crying, but it will improve if you do it consistently. Even if you don't believe in crying it out, it is a lifesaver for some people, and it helped me so much and turned our daughter into a fantastic sleeper.

Good for you for leaving the baby alone for a bit when you were feeling angry - we all feel that way sometimes, and the best thing to do is give yourself a few minutes of space to calm down (preferably with headphones with music, so that you can not hear the crying for a bit). Don't feel bad about it, just do what you have to do.

Also, even if in general you know about baby sleep, I recommend the 'Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child' book - it gives really detailed info about how much sleep and at what times of day your baby needs to sleep. This book really saved my sanity and made my daughter super happy while awake, helped her fall asleep easily, and sleep for longer stretches when asleep. It could be that your baby is acting this way because he's overtired - from your description, it sounds like he's not sleeping well in general, and that may be causing the fussiness.

If your baby is putting his hands in his mouth, have you tried a pacifier? My daughter never took one, but some babies love it and it helps them sleep.

Have you tried music to help soothe him when he's awake? Try different kinds - some babies prefer calm classical music, others feel better with rock music with a beat. Some like children's tapes, and some hate them. Try different things and see if it helps. Variation helps too.

I totally understand that you can't get a babysitter full time because it's expensive. You may want to consider getting one for 2 hours a day - both so your baby can get extra attention, and you can get a break from having to deal with a screaming baby - this may help your sanity more than anything.