Best cleaning lady but she steals

amother

Aubergine

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 4:01 pm

My cleaning lady started out by taking small stuff, like a bar of soap, a roll of toilet paper. Then it progressed to dishsoap. I have a large pantry so I stock up on everything... It took me a while to realize what was happening.
But it reached a point where I needed a bar of soap and I knew I just bought a few bars the day before, and they were gone! So I asked the cleaning lady if she had seen the soap bars, and she innocently said, no.
Finally, I found one day that she was stealing money from the pushka I kept on top of the fridge. I knew for a fact that the collector would be coming to empty it the next day, so I had placed a $20 bill inside....I went out to do some errands, and when I came home, I don't know what made me look inside, but the $20 bill was gone. Just the coins remained.
I called her that evening that we did not need her services any longer. Not sure if she knew why...
I never had her babysit, but always wonder, if your cleaning lady steals, she starts with the small stuff, but eventially might walk off with the baby, c"v. That is your most valuable possession. Get rid of her NOW.

amother

Powderblue

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 5:52 pm

I also went through my cleaning lady's bag once when I was almost sure that she was taking things. She did have things in her bag and of course she would have never admitted if confronted. Guess what else I did? I made a copy of her id so I could find her if I noticed later on that something more expensive was missing! This is not the same thing as going through a random person's belongings! This is an illegal immigrant from a nation that has a history of stealing!

amother

Yellow

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 5:59 pm

amother wrote:

I never had her babysit, but always wonder, if your cleaning lady steals, she starts with the small stuff, but eventially might walk off with the baby, c"v. That is your most valuable possession. Get rid of her NOW.

That actually happened a few years ago. A Chabad shaliachs baby was taken by the cleaning lady, she left the house and took the baby with her, bh they noticed and she was found at the train station with the baby. She was even stocked up on formula and diapers, so she clearly planned it shock

amother

Tan

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 6:08 pm

amother wrote:

What I don't get it! You hired her doesn't allow you to go through her stuff because she's an illegal immigrant from a nation that steals. You shouldn't hire such ppl then.

I really can't believe it.

Maybe ppl with cleaning help or workers in their house should have a sign like a see in stores
Bags maybe checked on the way out. (Or something of that sort)

amother

Purple

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 6:27 pm

as a frum yid from a country of cleaning lady um no words. there are frum illegals out there too. who overstay the visa. if you think a worker is stealing fire it isn't really worth it

33055

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 7:35 pm

amother wrote:

Powderblue explained that she is not a person, she is an immigrant.

mommy3b2c

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 7:40 pm

amother wrote:

Your attitude is shocking. My mouth is handing open.

If you do not trust someone. Don't hire them . My cleaning lady is a lovely Mexican woman, and I consider her a dear friend. She has my combination lock and let's herself in to my house . I trust her with my children too. And if I trust you with my children , I trust you with my house.

You literally sound like what I imagine nazis sounded like. "She's not a person she's just a Jew."

amother

Honeydew

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 8:34 pm

Stop leaving cleaning ladies in your house alone! Your kitchen is not reliable because of that. I don't usually eat in people's houses because of that. Cleaning ladies are not cheskas kashrut. Now let the tomatoes come down on me.

No rabbonim I'm affiliated with allow cleaning ladies alone in the home

amother

Mistyrose

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 8:36 pm

Okay, I just want to say something important.
If you're hiring someone to work in your home, you need to make a copy of her ID the day you hire her. If you won't be home, it's smart to install open cameras around your house (and tell her they're there). They're less than $100 each and are a much better alternative to going through her belongings when something comes up.

On the one hand, if you suspect someone is stealing from you or you question their intentions for your family, would you not do what it takes to protect yourselves? On the other hand, your housekeeper is a person too, with rights to privacy, and as her employer it was your responsibility upon hiring her to take whatever measures necessary not to violate her privacy and still be safe.

amother

Violet

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 8:43 pm

mommy3b2c wrote:

You literally sound like what I imagine nazis sounded like. "She's not a person she's just a Jew."

I agree with ur post... til here. Unless the poster is planning on exterminating her cleaning lady plus her people, calling her a nazi is so.... nazilike (heehee c what I did there?) not ever other person is s nazi for heavens sake

mommy3b2c

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 8:54 pm

amother wrote:

I did not say she is like a nazi. I said her attitude seems like a nazi attitude in regards to thinking of her cleaning lady as less then human.

dancingqueen

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 8:54 pm

If your sil suspected the cleaning lady the better thing to do is to tell her things are missing and can he please see her bag before she leaves. Way more chashuve and erliche than a man searching through a female employees bag on the sly.

And yes they should fire her of course.

amother

Mistyrose

Thu, Feb 09 2017, 9:04 pm

amother wrote:

Like I said above, I have a camera in my kitchen and this is very true. My housekeeper has treifed up dozens of things in my kitchen, mainly my microwave and toaster when she thought I wasn't looking. Every single time, I say something to her. I don't confront her in an aggressive way--I pretend she forgot the rule and I explain it patiently again. After a few times of being caught and feeling embarrassed she stopped, and that was nearly a year ago but I would still never dream to leave my kitchen unattended to. I check the camera every day.
And of course when my kids are with her I run through the cameras.
We have a good relationship because I told her I do this on the first day; we walked around the house together and I showed her where all the cameras are.

amother

Aqua

Fri, Feb 10 2017, 1:19 am

amother wrote:

Maybe ppl with cleaning help or workers in their house should have a sign like a see in stores
Bags maybe checked on the way out. (Or something of that sort)

Seriously, why do stores have a right to check your bags? Because they put up a sign? So if someone puts up a sign in their house, then its totally ok to do it?

imasinger

Fri, Feb 10 2017, 6:10 am

I don't know the right answer here, because it depends on how the employers feel, and how it is handled.

Possibly, such a person would respond to being OFFERED the small goods. Would it make a difference in their minds if the employers knew that, let's say, every penny of her income went towards a roof over her head, or medical care, and her dinner that night was going to be powdered soup mix, if only she had a few bowls and some crackers? Would they be comfortable saying, we will be happy to give you any small supplies you need, but if we find that you took again without asking, you'll be fired?

In the business world, stealing is officially never tolerated, but the percentage of people who help themselves to office supplies is quite high.

Or, equally possibly, these small thefts are kleptomania. Or the behavior of a thief who will escalate into taking the family silver, or worse.

In which case, the quality of her cleaning is moot in comparison. Kind of like saying, "I have the kindest doctor, only he never washes his hands and the death rate of his patients is a bit high," or "I have the best rav, when he's not abusing children."

zaq

Fri, Feb 10 2017, 7:40 am

OP, are you aware that a colloquial term for stealing everything a person values is called "cleaning them out" or "taking them to the cleaners"?

Calling her "the best cleaning lady" except for the small quirk that she steals is a little like saying a man is a great husband, except for the small quirk that he cheats.

octopus

Fri, Feb 10 2017, 8:08 am

amother wrote:

How did she treif these things up? Just curious.

allthingsblue

Fri, Feb 10 2017, 8:58 am

amother wrote:

I can't believe this post got 6 likes shock

amother

Apricot

Fri, Feb 10 2017, 8:58 am

amother wrote:

So maybe you shouldn't have her cook anymore?