Party that won't give me a nervous breakdown

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

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amother

Sienna

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 3:23 pm

I've never done birthday parties for my kids aside from upshernish. They get an in-school party plus cake and presents at home with immediate family plus grandparents (or, just the latter before old enough to be in school). My oldest having now been to many birthday parties is asking for a "real" party for his upcoming 6th birthday. Don't know what to do. I HATE kid parties. I don't really like children that aren't mine, for one thing. I also don't want to create an expectation that this will happen every year- not for him, nor for his siblings. But I do want to find a way to satisfy his request without me going mad.
I am not interested in booking a place but also scared to have 20 oversugared boys running around my home and my son getting presents from all of them on top of gifts from family. I have no idea how to entertain that many 5-6 year olds. I'm thinking of maybe having 5 or 6 friends over (and not necessarily from school), but still wouldn't know what to do with them and if that would be enough of a party for him. Any ideas how we can both be happy with the result?

amother

Green

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:05 pm

What season is your son's birthday in?

My mom used to make parties for my brothers in a local park. They'd play a game of soccer or football or do relay races and then have cake and zehu. Plenty of running around in fresh air and minimal cleanup.

Iymnok

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:05 pm

How much are you willing to spend?
Give the sugar at the very end. Start the cake 1/2 hr before pickup.
Hire an entertainer, juggler, magician...
Rent a jumping castle, it could entertain them for a while. Hire a teen to police them.
Limit the entire event to a decent length.

If it's nice, sprinkle chocolate coins around your yard and find a creative way for them to take 20 minutes to find them. (Blindfolded, three legged, only ones with red stickers, etc.)

amother

Sienna

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:12 pm

Early spring birthday, so relying on the outdoors is an iffy proposition. I don't want to spend more than $200, and that would need to include the cleaning help I'd need both before and after if it were in my house. Is 2 hours an appropriate length at this age or does it have to be longer?

Iymnok

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:15 pm

Perfect. Simple entertainment and the cake.

mha3484

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:16 pm

My 6 year old son went to a party last week. They played relay races and had cake. It was 1 hr 30 min. He had a lot of fun.

He has triplets in his grade so one in each class. That mother rented out a play area for 2 hours. She is brave. I would need a valium for that.

ra_mom

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:24 pm

I did it once too, around the same age, and make it clear that it was something special that we wouldn't do every year.
We had 5-6 kids over for 2 hours. We set up the table with kid fancy paper goods and decorations, served pizza, French fries, fancy bought character cupcakes (dd preferred those to a cake), pekelach, did a craft project that I had bought for each of them, played a birthday game together and then they all played with our toys. It was just right.
(About 5 years later I had to agree to a sleepover, also with 5-6 girls, and I also made it clear that it was something special and won't be happening every year. I had to prepare myself for a few years until I could psyche myself up to just do it. Smile

)

Last edited by ra_mom on Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:46 pm; edited 1 time in total

utissis

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:36 pm

I recently made a bday party for my son. I bought in a $ store a cute activity with sticking and decorating magnets that the 6/7 boys made was perfect after there was some ziti and Nosh and cake at the end. All of two hours barely any prep and I got cleaning help after.

tichellady

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:38 pm

I had a birthday party every year until I was 12. As did all my siblings. I never even thought that was unusual. I guess I have to thank my parents.

I'm trying to think of ideas that won't be so overwhelming for you. Could he take some friends bowling? That shouldn't cost so much money and won't be in your house. You can usually bring a cake to the bowling alley( call to ask before).

flowerpower

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:39 pm

Two hours is perfect. I never make it longer. Go to Orientaltrading.com and chose a character your son likes. Order papergoods and whatever else you want for the table. Try to get free shipping. Then order or make a birthday cake. I buy an ice cream cake. It comes out in the twenty something range. Do 1-2 games and a craft and you're good to
Go. Oh, and buy some cheap
Nosh/ drinks for the table.

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 4:42 pm

amother wrote:

Definitely not longer! 90 minutes is enough. Hire some tweets/teens to help supervise, whatever you choose to do.

Does your son have any special requests? He might like a particular game or activity. Does he want a theme?

It helps to have an ongoing activity (a craft project or playing catch in the backyard) while the kids arrive, so no one starts running around your house waiting for the party to start.

Classic party games kids like at that age include pass-the-present or "hot potato," freeze dancing and pin the tail on the donkey. They may enjoy active challenges such as limbo dancing, shooting hoops or t-ball. Avoid the piñata! You won't like the mess or the unruly behavior involved.

I doubt you could get a real professional entertainer and still keep to your budget, but a teenager might be available to do a magic show or the like. Ask around.

Another option is to take them to a pizza place. Some restaurants do a make-your-own pizza party that is fun for kids. if your crowd goes to movies, take them to see a movie, and then serve cake after. Easy-peasy.

Food can be part of the activity: make-your-own hero sandwich, ice cream sundae, decorated cupcake...

Let us know if you need more ideas.

MitzadSheini

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 7:00 pm

If your "nervous breakdown" comment is real, outsource the party and keep it to 90 minutes. There are plenty of party places to hire that will do everything- jumping castles; trampoline parks; soccer; painting; magic show etc. If you happen to be in therapy (im just assuming because it seems to be very common for people on this site) skip a session and ad it to the $200 to pay for the party. Or give up meat for two months - anything that avoids a nervous breakdown

I think that many parents who outsource parties are doing it for their own sanity rather than to "spoil" the child.

rachel6543

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 7:05 pm

Honestly arranging bday parties is too much for me. I did one "real" bday party a few years ago for my son when he turned 5 at a local kids museum. Since then, It's easier just to celebrate in school and have a small party (usually a shabbos meal) with family at home.

amother

Blush

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 11:17 pm

this is our plan: -I keep the kids busy!!!

we choose a topic ( firefighters). 5 kids can come.
birthday kid is in his costume, all guets get welcomed and we play a welcome game with music (about 10 minutes). then we are off to the dining room, where we sit and make fire engine crafts (I got the sets at the dollar store, very easy: cut and glue, thats it, and we fill them with nosh which I get on slae or store from after purim mm)- this activity takes about 15 minutes. we have bday songs playing in the background.

next we are off to dance one funny dance to give them some energy release (2 minutes)

off to the kitchen, where the table is set in red /white colours, disposable from the dollar store with fire and firefighter motives... the cake is round with fondant and the topper is a plastik fireengine car- kids love it!!!! (baking it the day before kids will help me - family activity)

we sing happy bday and ha yom yom huledet... when we are done eating cake, we are off to the living room, where we take a group picture with the crafted fireengines.

dh prints out these pics while we play 2 fireengine related games. I found cheap picture frames for 50 cents, put the fotos in the frames and let the kids decorate the frame with stickers, markers etc - kids take them home with thier crafts and pekalach as a souvenir

now my cleaningshold arrive, to clean the dining room and kitchen, and take over the baby.

I dress the kids and take them to the fireengine museum, which in out town is free. the museum is close the taxi costs me approx 10.

so basically I plan to keep the boys super busy, BUT I will have to entertain them.

an easier way would be to let the just play with lego, playmobile, magnatiles, all sorts of games, let them run around make tons of noise..... we DONT have a garden so thats NOT an option. cleaning up this mess and curing the migrene would kill me. so I prefer to keep things structured and organised. there is a place for kids to run around int he msueum, like a little indoor playground. they can run there as much as they want. ill have drinks and snacks ready. kids will be picked up there.

I hope this will work out!

by the time I come home the house should be clean and the baby put to a nap 8thats the plan), then mommy can have coffee and start HER day Smile

- haha

this bday will cost (including snacks, taxi, cleaning lady, cake, disposables)...approximately 60-70 euro.

amother

Copper

Mon, Feb 20 2017, 11:38 pm

When my oldest was begging for a birthday party around that age, I told her we'd make her a birthday party in first grade and that's it until her Bas Mitzvah! We've kept to that with subsequent kids; they all know they'll have a party for their class in first grade only.

This may be different because I've made parties for girls, but we did it in the house, for 1 1/2 hours. We put out nosh on the table and served (homemade) birthday cake. We went around the table and had each girl give the b-day girl a bracha (they've done this at school so they have experience). We made a happy birthday poster that we passed around so each kid could decorate and sign. We played some sort of game (I can't even remember what!) and made a project for the kids to take home. At one party in the spring we made very cute homemade pinwheels using paper, pencils from the dollar store, and push pins (google it to find directions for the project). And then it was time for the kids to go home! I'm pretty sure the total cost was well under $100.

Good luck!

SixOfWands

Tue, Feb 21 2017, 12:24 am

I'm not seeing how you could have cleaning help before and after a party, and still keep the cost under $200. Unless your cleaning help is really cheap.

Given your constraints, especially with not wanting a lot of kids around, consider bowling. It usually runs about $25 a kid, including the party room and, often, a coordinator. Now, the problem is that, especially at busy times, that might not book for 5 or 6 kids. But try. Worst they can do is say no. And make sure they put up bumpers, so no gutter balls.

At home, 90 minutes to 2 hours. First 1/2 hour is kids arriving and getting settled. Next 45 minutes is an activity. Then food and leave.

Party games would be good for arriving time. Simon Says. Take a Giant Step. That kind of stuff.

For activities, think scavenger hunt. Or building something. Science experiments -- make oobleck, and lava lamps (http://sciencekids.co.nz/experiments/easylavalamp.html). Or bake. Or get fabric markers and let them make tee shirts.

Happy birthday.

Iymnok

Tue, Feb 21 2017, 1:58 am

Why do you do crafts?
We always did gross motor activities.
Musical chairs, pin the tail, freeze dancing, Marco Polo, follow the leader, etc.
This type of activity has little preparation, no cleanup and minimal adult involvement.

You can go down to the local police and fire stations and invite them. We often had a fire truck and police car at our parties. They turned on the lights and let us honk the horn, climb around...
if you're lucky, they'll bring stickers and give a quick safety lesson.

rainbow dash

Tue, Feb 21 2017, 2:28 am

Look for 2 girls that can help you. I did that for my son and dd party. They kept the kids entertained and supervised them eating, played games with them.

Tell your kid upfront that you are only making one party. My kids know that in the,1st grade they are getting a party. Also some parents might join together to buy one present.

If you do the party at home get a cleaner to come and help.

Good luck

rainbow dash

Tue, Feb 21 2017, 2:31 am

And I brought the party favors by cheap shops and the activities also. For My girls I did candy necklaces. Look online for fun and cheap ideas

greenfire

Tue, Feb 21 2017, 2:36 am

I love birthday parties ... just make/decorate cupcakes & have something simple like pizza or hot dogs & fries ... give out some brain teasers http://www.orientaltrading.com......fltr & call it a happy day

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