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Forum
-> Interesting Discussions
Are all your kids tone-deaf?
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| My husband and I are both tone-deaf |
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13% |
[ 11 ] |
| My husband and I are both musical |
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30% |
[ 25 ] |
| I am tone deaf and my husband is musical |
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33% |
[ 27 ] |
| I am musical and my husband is tone-deaf |
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22% |
[ 18 ] |
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| Total Votes : 81 |
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amother
Pumpkin
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 Tue, Feb 28 2017, 10:36 pm
I'm conducting an unprofessional study about music genes.
My family is very musical. My husband's family is very unmusical.
All my children take after my husband's side 
For the poll, the word musical means "can carry a tune".
Please answer the poll only if ALL your kids are musically challenged!
If only some of your kids are tone-deaf, please post what percentage of your kids take after which parent.
You can also post your own music gene theories.
Thanks!
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cnc
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 10:40 pm
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What if it's the other way around? Can't sing for the life of mine but my children all sing beautifully. Even their teachers have commented how nicely they sing. My dh and his brothers all sing beautifully.
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amother
Pumpkin
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 10:45 pm
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Maybe we will conclude at the end of this study that kids take after their fathers!
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amother
Oak
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 10:51 pm
So far only 1 of my children seem to be tone deaf. Like you, I'm from a musical family DH not. The problem is this child loves singing at the top of her voice so we all just cringe but don't say anything! Oh and the fact that I'm a music teacher, doesn't do much for my credentials 
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imasinger
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:17 pm
Whoops, I answered the poll before reading your post. DH and I are musical, and so are the kids. Please discard my vote; I don't know how to delete it.
As a music professional, I have a strong reaction to your question.
Carrying a tune is only part nature, but a larger part nurture. There are extremely few people who are really tone deaf. In Hungary, which has an outstanding music curriculum for all, everyone sings well. In China, where accuracy in pitch is necessary for speaking the language, there are very few who can't sing on pitch.
It's all about having the chance to learn how.
This is my little corner of the world -- to teach the dayschool kids I work with how to match pitch and grow their ability as singers.
I hope your kids find a teacher like that, too.
In the meantime, the more practice children get, the better they sound. If you care, sing with them. During the day, in the car, at the Shabbos table.
Music belongs to everyone.
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amother
Pumpkin
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:21 pm
| imasinger wrote: | Whoops, I answered the poll before reading your post. DH and I are musical, and so are the kids. Please discard my vote; I don't know how to delete it.
As a music professional, I have a strong reaction to your question.
Carrying a tune is only part nature, but a larger part nurture. There are extremely few people who are really tone deaf. In Hungary, which has an outstanding music curriculum for all, everyone sings well. In China, where accuracy in pitch is necessary for speaking the language, there are very few who can't sing on pitch.
It's all about having the chance to learn how.
This is my little corner of the world -- to teach the dayschool kids I work with how to match pitch and grow their ability as singers.
I hope your kids find a teacher like that, too.
In the meantime, the more practice children get, the better they sound. If you care, sing with them. During the day, in the car, at the Shabbos table.
Music belongs to everyone. |
I really try! My kids hate music! They tell me to stop playing the piano. They don't like zmiros. I feel so lacking without music and my family is not on the same page as me! I wish there was a "cure" for them but they aren't bothered by their lack of interest in music so they will not put in the effort to overcome it!
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MagentaYenta
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:23 pm
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I'm tone deaf and my entire family is musically inclined. All play at least two instruments, and most have good singing voices. I OTH have been mastering the uke.
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imasinger
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:24 pm
| amother wrote: | | I really try! My kids hate music! They tell me to stop playing the piano. They don't like zmiros. I feel so lacking without music and my family is not on the same page as me! I wish there was a "cure" for them but they aren't bothered by their lack of interest in music so they will not put in the effort to overcome it! |
That's so sad! How old are they? Were they always like that? Do they ever listen to music in the car?
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smileyfaces
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:46 pm
Interesting poll.
My husband is very musical and my daughter seems to be musical, she's still a bit young to know for sure but she definitely can sing on tune. As for me, I can't really carry a tune.
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amother
Dodgerblue
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:55 pm
| imasinger wrote: | Whoops, I answered the poll before reading your post. DH and I are musical, and so are the kids. Please discard my vote; I don't know how to delete it.
As a music professional, I have a strong reaction to your question.
Carrying a tune is only part nature, but a larger part nurture. There are extremely few people who are really tone deaf. In Hungary, which has an outstanding music curriculum for all, everyone sings well. In China, where accuracy in pitch is necessary for speaking the language, there are very few who can't sing on pitch.
It's all about having the chance to learn how.
This is my little corner of the world -- to teach the dayschool kids I work with how to match pitch and grow their ability as singers.
I hope your kids find a teacher like that, too.
In the meantime, the more practice children get, the better they sound. If you care, sing with them. During the day, in the car, at the Shabbos table.
Music belongs to everyone. |
I did the same mistake, don't know how to delete...
But I do want to add to your point, because I grew up in a very musical family, and it was a big shock when I discovered my husband is tone deaf (as is his sister).
What I have noticed though is that he can't be completely tone deaf because some songs he sings well, and also, if I have him sing with me, and watch me carefully the whole time, he will sing pretty well...
So I was wondering if it is more about being attentive to your surroundings?
I also imagine that whereas for some, music just comes naturally, for others, it is something they must work at, but with the work, they can also achieve mastery.
All my kids are musical, by the way ba"h.
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WhatFor
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:58 pm
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Funny thought: Would fewer tone deaf parents be noticing their children are tone deaf? Wouldn't this poll be skewed to be answered by people who aren't tone deaf? (I see there are some tone deaf people, but none who are commenting that all their children are tone deaf!)
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imasinger
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Tue, Feb 28 2017, 11:58 pm
| amother wrote: | I did the same mistake, don't know how to delete...
But I do want to add to your point, because I grew up in a very musical family, and it was a big shock when I discovered my husband is tone deaf (as is his sister).
What I have noticed though is that he can't be completely tone deaf because some songs he sings well, and also, if I have him sing with me, and watch me carefully the whole time, he will sing pretty well...
So I was wondering if it is more about being attentive to your surroundings?
I also imagine that whereas for some, music just comes naturally, for others, it is something they must work at, but with the work, they can also achieve mastery.
All my kids are musical, by the way ba"h. |
IME, the main components are learning how to hear/differentiate tones, and then learning how to replicate what you hear.
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MagentaYenta
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 12:10 am
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Last year I was reading about a study of the brain and music. I'm pretty sure Micky Hart was one of the people whose brain they studied. Anyhow, from my lay understanding of the subject, musical people get to hone in and develop and expand different neural pathways. This can happen unconsciously and subconciously and purposely. For some tone deaf folks, this is not possible for others it is. I'm good with it, I often sing out of tune during the day and I love music of any kind.
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amother
Dodgerblue
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 12:13 am
| imasinger wrote: | | IME, the main components are learning how to hear/differentiate tones, and then learning how to replicate what you hear. |
This is fascinating to me.
While my husband usually doesn't hold a tune well, he is unbelievable at being able to replicate a persons voice and intonation.
He is a reserved person, but I think he would be great acting in the Purim play because he is so good at imitating people.
How can he be so bad at singing?!!
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amother
Mauve
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 12:39 am
[quote="amother"]Maybe we will conclude at the end of this study that kids take after their fathers
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 2:07 am
I can't answer the vote because some of my kids can sing and some sing out of tune.
I can carry a tune, my DH cannot.
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rachel91
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 4:34 am
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I am very musical, I sing and play piano singe age 5 (both of my parents are musical), my husband is definitely not musical, but his brother is a singer, I haven't figured out my kids yet, but they can definitely carry a tune.
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chanchy123
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 4:40 am
| amother wrote: | I did the same mistake, don't know how to delete...
But I do want to add to your point, because I grew up in a very musical family, and it was a big shock when I discovered my husband is tone deaf (as is his sister).
What I have noticed though is that he can't be completely tone deaf because some songs he sings well, and also, if I have him sing with me, and watch me carefully the whole time, he will sing pretty well...
So I was wondering if it is more about being attentive to your surroundings?
I also imagine that whereas for some, music just comes naturally, for others, it is something they must work at, but with the work, they can also achieve mastery.
All my kids are musical, by the way ba"h. |
That's interesting I am like your DH, my husband is very musical, I can sing OK if I'm singing with others, but can't keep the rhythm or tone when I sing alone (unless I know the song really well and it's an easy song). I always thought that it was because I lack the sense of rhythm but I am also absent minded and in general not necessarily as attentive to my surroundings, I never thought there was a connection - but now, I'm thinking maybe there is.
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amother
Ginger
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 6:47 am
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My best friend in high school was very talented at playing violin, but she couldn't carry a tune. There are people who can easily tell if someone else is singing off key, but they themselves cannot sing on key.
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imasinger
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Wed, Mar 01 2017, 6:59 am
| amother wrote: | This is fascinating to me.
While my husband usually doesn't hold a tune well, he is unbelievable at being able to replicate a persons voice and intonation.
He is a reserved person, but I think he would be great acting in the Purim play because he is so good at imitating people.
How can he be so bad at singing?!! |
It could be because the place where he holds pitch best is higher or lower than where most people sing. It might take a voice teacher listening to how he copies notes to say more.
| chanchy123 wrote: |
That's interesting I am like your DH, my husband is very musical, I can sing OK if I'm singing with others, but can't keep the rhythm or tone when I sing alone (unless I know the song really well and it's an easy song). I always thought that it was because I lack the sense of rhythm but I am also absent minded and in general not necessarily as attentive to my surroundings, I never thought there was a connection - but now, I'm thinking maybe there is. |
My kids and I can attest to the fact that people with ADHD can be great musicians. It just takes something to capture the interest and the desire, then hyperfocus can kick in.
| amother wrote: |
My best friend in high school was very talented at playing violin, but she couldn't carry a tune. There are people who can easily tell if someone else is singing off key, but they themselves cannot sing on key. |
When I first got interested in singing, I was not terrible, but was at least a little off pitch for much of the time. It was a combination of ear training and learning to sing properly (on the breath) that helped me.
That, and the overwhelming desire.
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