How much do you know about husbands business dealings?

amother

Coffee

Mon, Mar 06 2017, 6:05 pm

I unfortunately know a few people very wealthy people whose husbands have gotten arrested for white collar crimes. By most I was not really surprised, as everyone knows their husbands to have been involved in some publicized business deals that were less than favorable.
My question is, if I, as an outsider, was not surprised that they got arrested, what do their wives know? Do they step in if they know their husbands are acting unscrupulously or are they kept completely out of the loop?

amother

Blue

Mon, Mar 06 2017, 6:11 pm

Crooks convince themselves that they are acting properly. My guess is that they also convince their families. It's a lot more comfortable for a woman to believe that her husband is misunderstood than to admit that she's married to a con man.

heidi

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 12:24 am

I once commented to my friend how I didn't understand her friend who had 11 kids with a guy who was subsequently jailed for a white collar crime. How could she trust him?? And my friend asked how I get through to my husband when he's at work. I call his cellphone-- why should I bother his secretary? Ohhhh embarrassed

vicki

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 12:50 am

amother wrote:

Oops my bad! I guess was to mad to double check.

Too mad?

(Sorry couldn't resist).
If you were a wife kept in the dark, I'm sorry for your predicament.

amother

Denim

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 2:14 am

heidi wrote:

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 2:59 am

I know of couples who have divorced after shady dealings have come to light. Perhaps not all wives know, and not all approve.

(Of course there may be other factors contributing to divorce, and these are not people I know well).

sourstix

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 3:59 am

[quote="amother"]Crooks convince themselves that they are acting properly. My guess is that they also convince their families. It's a lot more comfortable for a woman to believe that her husband is misunderstood than to admit that she's married to a con man.[/quote]

The problem with that is that when you end up being caught with the law this ain't an excuse.

To tell the judge your dh is misunderstood is not gonna work. If your aware of it. You gotta do something to protect yourself. Not sure how. Cause then you can be held responsible for that too. Protect yourself and your kids!

33055

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 4:38 am

sourstix wrote:

The problem with that is that when you end up being caught with the law this ain't an excuse.

To tell the judge your dh is misunderstood is not gonna work. If your aware of it. You gotta do something to protect yourself. Not sure how. Cause then you can be held responsible for that too. Protect yourself and your kids!

Sorry, but I don't understand how a wife can be held responsible for a husband's actions.

33055

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 4:45 am

amother wrote:

I believe they know, but they are not taught this is wrong. A lot of people see others doing the same thing and this is how they learn business is done.

The people are taught it is ok to steal from a g°y or the government. This doesn't carry stigma.

amother

Mistyrose

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 4:53 am

Not everyone convicted of a white color crime is guilty. Sometimes they are framed by their boss who put documents under their names to cover their track.

I know someone in that situation. Neither he or his wife had any clue what was going on. It came up in court, but unfortunately he was found guilty. The prosecutor thankfully just asked for parole, so he never sat in jail, but has a record.

I know someone else that thought he was helping someone and tweaked the truth on some files. Since he was elderly his son (working for him) took the blame and sat for a year. I admire his character!

Both of these wives were clueless. Their husbands never committed a crime, yet they have a record.

amother

Blue

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 5:03 am

amother wrote:

I know someone else that thought he was helping someone and tweaked the truth on some files. Since he was elderly his son (working for him) took the blame and sat for a year. I admire his character!

In what legal system is something like that possible?? I'm guessing there's more to these stories than you know.

amother

Mistyrose

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 5:11 am

amother wrote:

In what legal system is something like that possible?? I'm guessing there's more to these stories than you know.

It had to do with an insurance claim

amother

Blue

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 5:18 am

amother wrote:

It had to do with an insurance claim

The nature of the crime is irrelevant. No modern legal system allows an innocent man to go to jail in place of a guilty one.

33055

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 5:19 am

amother wrote:

In what legal system is something like that possible?? I'm guessing there's more to these stories than you know.

These stories are 100% plausible to me. I know a father who did time for a son. He pled guilty because he felt his son was too weak to do time. Both benefited, but the son did the wrong doing.

Yesterday, someone asked me to sign a letter stating they worked for me because they needed to show income to qualify for a mortgage. I could have gotten tangled up in something just to be nice.

amother

Papaya

Tue, Mar 07 2017, 5:27 am

DH is extremely secretive about all of our finances. I don't even know how much money we have in the bank, or how many other accounts he has overseas. I know he owns several properties overseas, but I have no idea where they are, or what they are worth.

I have overheard phone conversations, and I know that he helps people do multi million dollar real estate deals, while the clients are living in council housing (low income subsidized), and are getting benefits. He protects them and puts their investments in shell corporations.

He claims he's disgusted by his clients, and is "just trying to keep them out of trouble because they are frum", and that he "can't report them because that would be going to the authorities."

Our divorce is going to be VERY interesting. Confused

(Eta to go anon. FF)

Last edited by amother on Tue, Mar 07 2017, 6:38 am; edited 1 time in total