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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Purim
Purim and drinking
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amother
Magenta


 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 11:54 am
amother wrote:
I didn't hug the posts but I'll bet the hugs are because many believe that drinking out of control is a very dangerous and disturbing thing to do and to have kids witness.
The descriptions by wives of wonderful, generous drunk husbands may be believed to be extremely misguided. That families take this opportunity to drink in a "religion-sanctioned" way may be believed to be ugly.
Just a guess.


But a good guess. I also don't hug but you expressed my sentiments exactly.
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 1:13 pm
I hugged a bunch of posts....

I think it's because I feel bad that your husbands aren't emotional during the year. Hearing how people "look forward" to Purim b/c they hear these things is absolutely ridiculous...and then you feel all holier-than-thou cuz your husband is such a "sweet, cute drunk"... seriously?!?!

You're babies. Immature women who have pretty immature husbands who can't face their emotional sides during the year and think it's adorable.

Enjoy your drunken mush.
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 1:14 pm
Oh, yeah... I hugged my own post first...cuz I know they're coming... BRING IT!
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 1:17 pm
amother wrote:
I didn't hug the posts but I'll bet the hugs are because many believe that drinking out of control is a very dangerous and disturbing thing to do and to have kids witness.
The descriptions by wives of wonderful, generous drunk husbands may be believed to be extremely misguided. That families take this opportunity to drink in a "religion-sanctioned" way may be believed to be ugly.
Just a guess.


First of all, my husband is obviously not drinking out of control. And I'm sure all the another's husbands are not out of control. It isnt disturbing for my children at all. They love it. There is absolutely nothing dangerous about getting drunk in a controlled manner some times. My husband doesn't need religion to sanction anything. He goes to bars with me or his friends and gets drunk too. He is an extremely safe drunk. He tells anyone who is willing to listen that he's drunk and that he gave the car keys to his wife. He keeps repeating that drinking while driving his dangerous with big wide eyes. It's very sweet and funny. Obviously drinking until you throw up and pass out is disgusting. None of us are talking about that, though.
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 1:20 pm
amother wrote:
I hugged a bunch of posts....

I think it's because I feel bad that your husbands aren't emotional during the year. Hearing how people "look forward" to Purim b/c they hear these things is absolutely ridiculous...and then you feel all holier-than-thou cuz your husband is such a "sweet, cute drunk"... seriously?!?!

You're babies. Immature women who have pretty immature husbands who can't face their emotional sides during the year and think it's adorable.

Enjoy your drunken mush.


I am sorry that you are in unhappy marriage. I truly am, but don't take it out on random women on the internet. You'd be better off going for marriage counseling. Have a happy Purim! May all your prayers be answered!
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 1:35 pm
mommy3b2c wrote:
I am sorry that you are in unhappy marriage. I truly am, but don't take it out on random women on the internet. You'd be better off going for marriage counseling. Have a happy Purim! May all your prayers be answered!


Whoa.

Assume much?

I think I'm in the happier marriage... my DH tells me he loves me every day... without the drink.
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 1:46 pm
amother wrote:
Whoa.

Assume much?

I think I'm in the happier marriage... my DH tells me he loves me every day... without the drink.


Well I'm relieved to hear that. However, I cannot for the life of me imagine what would cause you to have a such a strong reaction and call a bunch of woman names. If it was personal and a trigger for you somehow then I can understand, but youre actually insulting me for no reason. Interesting.

Bh, my husband compliments me and tells me he loves me all year. He just gets super mushy on Purim. And I happen to find it cute. No need to call me names.
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 1:52 pm
mommy3b2c wrote:
Well I'm relieved to hear that. However, I cannot for the life of me imagine what would cause you to have a such a strong reaction and call a bunch of woman names. If it was personal and a trigger for you somehow then I can understand, but youre actually insulting me for no reason. Interesting.

Bh, my husband compliments me and tells me he loves me all year. He just gets super mushy on Purim. And I happen to find it cute. No need to call me names.


You are right... I am triggered by something else going on ... B"H not marriage.

I just remember going to a really yeshivish purim seuda for the first time ever after we got married, and I saw these respected yeshiva rabbis acting CRAZY and puking... and then one man's pregnant wife had to drive him and ALL the kids home... and I just am grossed out by drinking ever since.

A year or two later I went to my husband's family in NY (I live OOT therefore am not used to crazy purims) and I saw his family members get drunk. It was revolting.

You'll never convince me that drinking is adorable, or that there isn't some immaturity in "looking forward to it all year long". And I didn't mean to be insulting - just matter o'fact.
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 2:27 pm
amother wrote:
You are right... I am triggered by something else going on ... B"H not marriage.

I just remember going to a really yeshivish purim seuda for the first time ever after we got married, and I saw these respected yeshiva rabbis acting CRAZY and puking... and then one man's pregnant wife had to drive him and ALL the kids home... and I just am grossed out by drinking ever since.

A year or two later I went to my husband's family in NY (I live OOT therefore am not used to crazy purims) and I saw his family members get drunk. It was revolting.

You'll never convince me that drinking is adorable, or that there isn't some immaturity in "looking forward to it all year long". And I didn't mean to be insulting - just matter o'fact.


First of all, I never said I look forward to it all year long. I don't need to. My husband gets drunk on other occasions besides Purim. Second of all, I'm not trying to convince you of anything. I, and some other members said that we like the way our husbands act when they get drunk. Nobody advocated for drunkenness or said that it's great to be an alcoholic. Third, you were condescending and quite rude. Reread your post. It wasn't matter of fact at all. I'm sure we are all in agreement that puking is disgusting. You might notice that all of us who said that our husbands act cute, did not mention anything about puking. That's because not all people puke and act disgusting when they are drunk. Bh, everyone in my family acts perfectly lovely when they are drunk. I'm sorry its not the same way with your family and friends.
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amother
Sapphire


 

Post Fri, Mar 10 2017, 6:21 pm
mommy3b2c wrote:
First of all, I never said I look forward to it all year long. I don't need to. My husband gets drunk on other occasions besides Purim. Second of all, I'm not trying to convince you of anything. I, and some other members said that we like the way our husbands act when they get drunk. Nobody advocated for drunkenness or said that it's great to be an alcoholic. Third, you were condescending and quite rude. Reread your post. It wasn't matter of fact at all. I'm sure we are all in agreement that puking is disgusting. You might notice that all of us who said that our husbands act cute, did not mention anything about puking. That's because not all people puke and act disgusting when they are drunk. Bh, everyone in my family acts perfectly lovely when they are drunk. I'm sorry its not the same way with your family and friends.


Maybe you mean tipsy and not drunk then? Because in my lexicon drunk is kind of sloppy but tipsy can be fun.
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 11 2017, 7:41 pm
amother wrote:
Maybe you mean tipsy and not drunk then? Because in my lexicon drunk is kind of sloppy but tipsy can be fun.


Tipsy is drunk. Just not disgusting drunk. And no one in my family gets disgusting drunk.
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Water Stones




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 11 2017, 7:54 pm
mommy3b2c wrote:
I don't think I made it sound like that at all. There's just something about him when he's drunk that turns him into a puppy. And besides, when you're drunk, your inhibitions come down. If you act gentle and kind, it's because at your core you are gentle and kind. Mean drunks act mean, because that is really who they are.
.

My dh is like yours. He doesn't drink a lot but he drinks on Purim and he's get so cuter and funny when he dance. He never threw up or pass out.
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amother
Sapphire


 

Post Sat, Mar 11 2017, 8:02 pm
mommy3b2c wrote:
Tipsy is drunk. Just not disgusting drunk. And no one in my family gets disgusting drunk.


Tipsy is lightly inebriated. And exactly it calls to mind fun drunk not disgusting drunk. Smile
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 11 2017, 8:09 pm
amother wrote:
Tipsy is lightly inebriated. And exactly it calls to mind fun drunk not disgusting drunk. Smile


Precisely.

My whole point in chiming in. Some people get fun drunk. Not everybody gets disgusting drunk. I'm glad that my husband and brothers and cousins are the former.
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amother
Gold


 

Post Sat, Mar 11 2017, 10:44 pm
amother wrote:
You are right... I am triggered by something else going on ... B"H not marriage.

I just remember going to a really yeshivish purim seuda for the first time ever after we got married, and I saw these respected yeshiva rabbis acting CRAZY and puking... and then one man's pregnant wife had to drive him and ALL the kids home... and I just am grossed out by drinking ever since.

A year or two later I went to my husband's family in NY (I live OOT therefore am not used to crazy purims) and I saw his family members get drunk. It was revolting.

You'll never convince me that drinking is adorable, or that there isn't some immaturity in "looking forward to it all year long". And I didn't mean to be insulting - just matter o'fact.


If you didn't mean to be insulting, why the hugs?
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Sun, Mar 12 2017, 1:08 am
amother wrote:
If you didn't mean to be insulting, why the hugs?


I don't view hugs as an insult.

It's more like, "Awww, I feel so bad for you, let me hug you."
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amother
Sienna


 

Post Sun, Mar 12 2017, 3:14 am
amother wrote:
I don't view hugs as an insult.

It's more like, "Awww, I feel so bad for you, let me hug you."

And THAT is insulting.
Would you do that in person?
Real hugs are for love or emotional release (condolences and the like).
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 12 2017, 4:17 am
amother wrote:
And THAT is insulting.
Would you do that in person?
Real hugs are for love or emotional release (condolences and the like).
would you care to explain the difference between"I feel so bad for you" and "condolences "? Aside from intensity?

FYI genuine huggers would indeed hug you to express "I feel so bad for you." What do you think all those {{{{}}}} are in response to imamother sob stories? That's precisely what the hug button is supposed to express. That some or many or even most imas use it sarcastically to mean "you poor thing, such a shame you were dropped on your head as an infant" doesn't change that.
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mommy3b2c




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 12 2017, 7:51 am
zaq wrote:
would you care to explain the difference between"I feel so bad for you" and "condolences "? Aside from intensity?

FYI genuine huggers would indeed hug you to express "I feel so bad for you." What do you think all those {{{{}}}} are in response to imamother sob stories? That's precisely what the hug button is supposed to express. That some or many or even most imas use it sarcastically to mean "you poor thing, such a shame you were dropped on your head as an infant" doesn't change that.


True. But the poster in question was using it in very condescending and immature manner. She then promptly called a bunch of women immature.

Not such a big deal. Every single one of my posts gets hugged. There is not even one that doesn't. It doesn't matter what I write. I've gotten used to it.
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amother
Seashell


 

Post Sun, Mar 12 2017, 9:00 am
I love purim. My husband gets a little drunk or tipsy or whatever you want to call it and the atmosphere is very festive. He drinks once all mm are delivered and it's basically over. He's a cheerful drunk, sings a ton and is all friendly whereas he's usually shy. He's always affectionate with me so this day is no different.
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