Would you shop online...

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Judaism -> Halachic Questions and Discussions

1 2 3 Next

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Gray

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 9:45 am

There's a relative who believes that the internet is worst thing ever and has no access to it. They don't even know how to work a computer.

I have an issue with them asking me to shop for them online. If you think it's assur why are you making me do it?

Opinions please!

Stars

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 9:48 am

It;s horrible. I tell these people outright "I am not your shabbos [gentile]"

farm

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:11 am

Unless said relative can give me a good reason why it's ok for her to ask me to sin on her behalf, I wouldn't do it.

Optione

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:15 am

I wouldn't.

amother

Violet

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:17 am

Totally with you. A friend of mine asks me to google symptoms for her, different colors for cabinets that she's looking at, prices for kids clothes...if you're so darn proud of your filter, live by it. And don't look at my home as less religious but use it for your convenience.

essie14

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:17 am

amother wrote:

Agree with you. I have big problems with anyone asking me do to something that they wouldn't do (carry in eruv, open soda bottle on Shabbat, etc)

MiracleMama

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:19 am

Maybe if it was an older person, where age factored into their attitude and abilities. Otherwise, no way.

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:25 am

essie14 wrote:

Agree with you. I have big problems with anyone asking me do to something that they wouldn't do (carry in eruv, open soda bottle on Shabbat, etc)

thats different!!!
it more of a matter of minhag

essie14

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:27 am

amother wrote:

thats different!!!
it more of a matter of minhag

Minhag? Either you think it's allowed or not.

amother

Chartreuse

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:31 am

essie14 wrote:

Minhag? Either you think it's allowed or not.

right I meant that-
but internet is not like that .

itsnot a matter allowed or not!

amother

Violet

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 11:57 am

essie14 wrote:

Agree with you. I have big problems with anyone asking me do to something that they wouldn't do (carry in eruv, open soda bottle on Shabbat, etc)

The erev and soda bottle thing totally don't bother me, because that's an acknowledged difference of opinion vs someone accepting a chumra on themselves or being 'holy.' Friends who don't open soda bottles are happy to openly ask at a table for others to open it for them, acknowledging that both ways are totally acceptable forms of frumkeit.

People who don't have internet maintain a facade that they sacrifice the convenience the internet offers to keep their home 'sheltered and pure.' Then they use people with internet while looking down on them and wanting their kids in separate schools.

essie14

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 12:22 pm

amother wrote:

Fair enough. You're right, the reason they don't have internet is to maintain some facade -- it's a huge double standard for them to ask someone else to shop for them. They also maintain that they can live without it, but clearly they can't.

Goldie613

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 12:39 pm

Does she think it's bad for her to use it, or just bad to have it in her house (if there are kids in the home, etc.)?

Would you react differently if you offered to show her how to use your computer at home, and she took you up on it?

I guess my question is, are you reacting this way because you think she's asking you to do something that she herself believes is halachikly not allowed, or is she just asking you because she doesn't want the internet in her home and therefore she's never used it, doesn't know how to use it, and therefore would need your help to do so?

I know there are family members who've asked me to do stuff for them online, not because they are anti using a computer themselves, but they simply don't have the skills to do so. If that's the case here, then I don't see helping her as a problem. If she's asking you to do something that she sees as different-people-hold-differently, again, I would think that would be ok, but YMMV. If she's asking you to do something that she believes is truly assur, almost as though you were violating shabbos or something, yeah, I could see that feeling awkward.

I guess it all comes down to what's behind her request.

return2You

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 12:45 pm

There's actually someone in Williamsburg who's turned this into a business. She orders stuff for people on Amazon and other places and charges for it. Hilarious thing ever.

If you believe it's the most treif thing ever then don't ask others to do your dirty work and burn in hell for you.
There are other options- there are always filtered internet kiosks if you want to stick by your orinciples but require the net for info or shopping

Maryann

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 1:23 pm

it really depends why she doesnt have, my sister doesnt have because her husband doesnt let and also so her kids can go to a certain school, nothing more
so im really happy to help her out ,
I understand her that she doesnt have a choice and its not so easy for her

amother

Gray

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 1:40 pm

im glad to see that your all agree with me. Thanks for the replies.

MagentaYenta

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 1:44 pm

I see I'm last to the party but I would say no and explain why I would not support her hypocrisy.

amother

Gray

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 1:46 pm

They don't have internet because they honestly believe that it's assur. They don't even have text on their phones. I have no issue with that but then don't come knocking at my door when it's convenient for you.

amother

Ivory

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 1:55 pm

My friend doesn't have Internet because she doesn't need it for her work. I have it for work. She used to ask me to shop for her, but instead I taught her how to shop online and I let her use my computer. Works for both of us, but she does say that I'm better at finding deals than she is.

amother

Indigo

Thu, Mar 30 2017, 3:18 pm

I don't want to be an internet cafe. dont ask me to hook up to my internet. However, I would order something for my sister or aunt as I understand their reasoning why they don't have it. But, if it's annoying or inconvenient, I won't do it.

Page 1 of 3

1 2 3 Next