MYOB? | Imamother

33055

Sun, Apr 02 2017, 11:12 am

amother wrote:

If we're going by anecdotal evidence, all of my siblings were the fattest, roundest babies. By the time they were 3 they had all slimmed down, and everyone in my family is at their ideal weight or slight below it.

You quoted studies that are irrelevant here. 5 year olds are not 20 month olds. Is there any study which proves that fat babies make overweight adults?

I quoted one study in reply to posters writing about older children.

This is another I reply to your post about babies.

"Most babies are a bit chubby. ... Extremely overweight babies-who are more than 20 percent above the median for their height and skeletal structure-have a significant chance of eventually becoming obese adults. If your baby is simply chubby, don't be concerned-all babies have more body fat than older children.
Baby Physical Growth: Do Fat Babies Make Fat Adults? - Parents

33055

Sun, Apr 02 2017, 11:52 am

petiteruchy wrote:

The op said the child was eating healthy food. The food example she gave was typical for my youngest, who is an insane bundle of energy. I'll say it again. 20 months old, the child is not eating out of boredom or overeating. The child comes with a preprogrammed satiation switch that should be untampered with. A chubby 20 month old is not in ANY universe a cause for concern. Of any kind. Let alone from a grandma who is "disgusted" by watching her eat a banana.

It sounds wonderful, but it simply isn't true. The medical universe doesn't agree with you if you want a universe where you are wrong that is the one.

I don't know where you got the idea that 20 month old babies have a satiation switch and can regulate their own eating.

The grandma didn't say she was disgusted. She said almost disgusted. The baby ate two bananas, cereal, and yogart for breakfast. This is a breakfast that is twice what I eat.

Each banana is 90 calories. A cup of cereal with skim milk is 230. And a non-fat Greek yogurt is 100 calories. We don't know if this baby was being fed skim milk and non-fat yogart. I would guess not, but I wanted to present it in the best light. You feed your baby more than 510 calories for breakfast?

OP also wouldn't be concerned of the baby was not extra large.

ETA
Food Intake
The AAP states that toddlers should eat on average 550 to 950 calories not including liquids.

If you back out the 40 calories from the skim milk, the toddler ate 470 calories from the first meal. AAP guidelines go on to state that 20 month olds should have 3 meals and 2 snacks daily.

amother

Olive

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 1:13 am

petiteruchy wrote:

I also find that my 16 mo eats nonstop. When asked the ped he was totally not concerned as he was still below 50th%. He looks very fat as he's short. But as long as they're eating healthy food and active toddlers- nothing to be concerned about.
My sister was so concerned about my baby, she said I should test him for prader will syndrome!

33055

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 5:28 am

Iymnok wrote:

When my toddlers go through a growth spurt at that age, I regularly catch them finishing the leftovers from their older siblings. This is right after a full meal. Right now my skinny 15 mo is eating a bigger bowl of cream of wheat than any of her siblings. With whole milk.

I hope everyone doesn't think that I believe normal chubby toddlers need to be on diets, nor do I believe that kids who chunk up before growth spurts are not normal. It is just some of the stuff being written and applauded on this thread is so out there.

I know a couple, and they had a huge toddler. Both of them were really skinny teenagers, and they were proud of their big baby. They would show off how big the baby was - like no one could see for themselves.

This baby was ginormous! The child was wider than the parents.

That baby grew into an obese girl. The parents are still clueless about nutrition. She is given a diet like OP's grandchild. I am not a small adult, and she also eats twice what I eat. It is not only the tour of food which must be regulated, but the portions must also be controlled. Children don't come with automatic switches that regulate their behavior. It is up to the parents to make sure behavior is appropriate at 20 months and while the child is still young. If children could regulate themselves, why do pediatricians need to be involved with weight?

FranticFrummie

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 8:15 am

Squishy wrote:

why do pediatricians need to be involved with weight?

Because they are looking for metabolic syndromes, failure to thrive, etc. That is why there are percentiles and averages, and not a one size fits all figure (pardon the pun).

My "butterball" toddler is 13 now, and in the 40th percentile for height and weight. She is very petite for her age, and perfectly proportionate.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again and again. If the pediatrician says the baby is fine, then it is nobody else's business!

Frankly, I'm much more concerned that OP said that she was "almost disgusted" and "embarrassed" by a chubby baby. Why is this all about her and her feelings? She needs to work on herself, and leave the parenting to the parents.

33055

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 8:36 am

FranticFrummie wrote:

I know why pediatricians look at weight. My question was a rhetorical one in response to the poster who said kids come with a shutoff switch, so they can regulate their own eating.

I am most concerned with posters who pick up junk information on this site regarding parenting.

sourstix

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 11:09 am

Maybe op can myob here. The worry of the grandmother won't make it if there's a problem to go away.

Like others have said. The pediatrician can alert the mother. Gosh I have a couple of kids. Each one with their own nature. To the poster who says to control food intake for a 20 month old. At that age they need to gain weight. Maybe ops grandchild is taking too much sugar like juice which has many empty calories.

Op leave your dd alone. She is ok in how she's handling her child. Nothing your gonna say or do is Conan change this only make her angry with you.

Op Don't say a thing to them. It's not your place to say anything. Love this child and hug and kiss them the more the merrier. If you want to help her the take your grandkids to the park so they get more movement. And stop worrying. It doesn't help

Fox

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 11:55 am

We can trade studies and opinions about the causes of and remedies for obesity all day. It's true that obese kids are at greater risk for becoming obese adults, but it's also true that underweight babies are at greater risk for becoming obese adults. The fact is that we don't really understand why some people's brains don't signal satiation correctly.

I understand the OP's concern, but 20 months seems a little early to be too worried. If the child is otherwise active and healthy, I suspect that most pediatricians would give the problem a little time before addressing it directly.

MYOB. It's true that teenagers and adults can be motivated to change behaviors associated with obesity as a result of social pressure and peer group norms, but I don't think a pinched expression on Bubby's face is likely to make a positive impact on a toddler's choices.

33055

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 11:58 am

sourstix wrote:

We are all in agreement that OP should not say anything to the mom.

Yes, you control the food a child eats at 20 months. You need to control the total environment for that child because that child doesn't have switches. Anything else is ludicrous. Please note: controlling food is not calorie counting.

Also, please note: there are children at age 20 months who are being set on the path to obesity with all the health issues. Nothing any poster has said to the contrary has been backed up by science.

I get my information from Parent magazine and medical websites. Please show me the studies that speak about the satiation switch in 20 month olds. Furthermore, please show me any study that says you should not be concerned about a 20 month old who is grossly overweight.

Iymnok

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 12:04 pm

Who says she's grossly overweight? Her dr. has her weight chartsand knows if she's within normal and on her own curve. There is a difference between very chubby and overweight. It's hard to tell in a toddler.
I still think you should be pinching her pulkes and giving her strawberry kisses. In the folds of her neck gives the best laugh!

Fox

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 12:12 pm

Squishy wrote:

Furthermore, please show me any study that says you should not be concerned about a 20 month old who is grossly overweight.

I think any normal parent would be concerned. The issue is that overweight in a toddler has to be evaluated in connection with a number of other things, including the rate of the trend, the types of food the child seems to crave, etc.

That's why pediatricians maintain graphs, ask questions about activity levels, and monitor developmental milestones.

Without thorough training in pediatric nutrition or on the advice of someone who is a trained professional, it's not safe to be too restrictive in a toddler's diet. Toddlers' brains are developing and require very different nutrients than teens or adults, including higher levels of fat, for example.

In fact, my kids' pediatrician was very vocal that parents should not in general restrict food under the age of 8 or 10. He felt that the risk of impeding neurological development was greater than the risk of long-term obesity.

It's reasonable to be concerned, but we have to remember that most of us are not really experts.

amother

Cyan

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 12:31 pm

I am the author of the "super husky son" thread. Please don't say anything!

And a 20 month old is WAAAAY to young to even be thinking in this direction. I have seen many super pudgy babies thin out completely.

Even if the child was older and it was already an issue (or in a few years from now if it's still an issue), how exactly would it help to say anything aside for making your daughter feel self conscious in your eyes? It doesn't sound like she's feeding her children junk food, anyway, and if she was raised by a sensible mother like you, she will figure out what needs to be done without your interference.

If your daughter is a caring, involved mother, she doesn't need anyone else to make her feel bad, especially not her own mother. Every pediatrician charts height and weight and will say something if necessary. Most mothers are trying their hardest already.

She needs to be supported, not criticized in her parenting, even if you think it isn't perfect. I'm sure your parenting wasn't perfect either.

My own relatives are not very helpful in this area, and it is painful enough to be there for my child when he faces the world without the feeling that my child will be under the eagle eyes of grandparents whose main job is just to love and appreciate them unconditionally.

Sorry if I am coming across too harshly, but I am feeling the strain of this right now.

Please, please don't say anything!

SixOfWands

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 12:33 pm

Iymnok wrote:

Cream of wheat the week before Pesach? Brave soul!

But my kids always bulk up before a growth spurt. "She's eating a lot" and "she's getting a little chubby" is usually followed shortly by "everything is too short!"

If it were my child, I'd talk to his doctor about whether there are possible issues. I'd also be careful to ensure that I'm not encouraging overeating, or messing with his hunger signals. That I'm feeding healthful, nutritious foods. And that there is plenty of activity. Then I'd leave it alone at this stage.

If it were my grandchild, I would MYOB.

amother

Chocolate

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 12:50 pm

One thing I want to add here-
The food today is very low nutritional value. We have a generation of starving obese people.
Eating good quality food helps u feel more satiated. Whole grains. Whole foods. Produce with higher mineral content. Healthy fats.
I agree if the quality of the food is good and she's not having too much junk, I wouldn't worry.

SixOfWands

Mon, Apr 03 2017, 12:57 pm

amother wrote:

The reason that so many people living in poverty are also obese is because low-nutrition food is often cheapest. Think potatoes and the dollar menu at Taco Bell, as opposed to fresh fruits and vegetables. There is also the issue of "food deserts" -- inner cities without supermarkets, where the people are dependent on higher-cost bodegas.

That doesn't seem to be the case here. The child is eating yogurts and bananas. And cereal, admittedly, but nothing wrong with whole grain cereals.