Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Pesach
I am so dreading this yom tov:(
1  2  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:02 pm
I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but does everyone come to the seder ready to listen to a bunch of long drawn out divrei torah, and singing, and excited at the prospect of going to sleep at who knows when? All I'm thinking about is shulchan orech, I sometimes even go into the kitchen and sneak food. I'm thinking about my bed and my pillow, and the fact that I am worn out physically and emotionally from this very difficult yom tov. I am drained from working, cooking, cleaning, and because my kids have been out of school for so long already and there isn't much structure here, it's survival of the fittest and they're being kids. I feel like a shmatta and the thought of serving 10 yom tov meals is draining. I am so so sad. DH is a tremendous help, but I have so much on my plate, my resources are maxed out. But I've never looked forward to pesach. Am I the only wierdo around who cannot wait for a return to normalacy?
Back to top

causemommysaid




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:05 pm
Na. Lots of us have no patience for the seder. I just do my own thing these days. No waiting and dragging things out for me. Makes me happier.
Back to top

octopus




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:08 pm
No, you are not a weirdo! I happen to enjoy pesach, but every year the seder disappoints. And the only reason is because I'm usually so exhausted by the first seder night, I just can't enjoy it, and I can barely get up to serve. Forget about cleanup! The first days are a fog of washing dishes and picking up the house. But I usually recover chol hamoed and enjoy the last days. One year I fell asleep at the seder at the table, in front of my inlaws. How embarrassing! We have limits to divrei torah and how many kids can say. Getting past mah nishtana takes forever because each kid needs a turn. We are not such a singing family and that usually goes fast. We usually end by midnight, but if it ended any later, I would be a basket case.
Back to top

amother
Cerulean


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:12 pm
octopus wrote:
No, you are not a weirdo! I happen to enjoy pesach, but every year the seder disappoints. And the only reason is because I'm usually so exhausted by the first seder night, I just can't enjoy it, and I can barely get up to serve. Forget about cleanup! The first days are a fog of washing dishes and picking up the house. But I usually recover chol hamoed and enjoy the last days. One year I fell asleep at the seder at the table, in front of my inlaws. How embarrassing! We have limits to divrei torah and how many kids can say. Getting past mah nishtana takes forever because each kid needs a turn. We are not such a singing family and that usually goes fast. We usually end by midnight, but if it ended any later, I would be a basket case.


You mentioned washing dishes. I use nice disposable for Pesach, it makes my life so much easier.
Back to top

octopus




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:18 pm
amother wrote:
You mentioned washing dishes. I use nice disposable for Pesach, it makes my life so much easier.


Yes, that would make my life easier. I use real for the seder, but use disposable for the rest of pesach. Not to mention washing pots are pans- well there is no way around getting that. It always takes me an hour and half to two hours to wash dishes. And I'm too tired after the seder to do it. I get up at 7:00am the next morning to do it. I straighten up my dining room and living room. Get the food warmed up. I get my kids dressed and myself. I'm usually exhausted for the second seder, too. Because of all the cleanup, etc. and I make sure to take the kiddie-poos out to the playground.
Back to top

amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:19 pm
amother wrote:
You mentioned washing dishes. I use nice disposable for Pesach, it makes my life so much easier.


Op here, nope, I never said anything about washing dishes. I use disposables
Back to top

amother
Salmon


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:24 pm
I make a blockout nap time for everyone big and small in the afternoon and then serve a big supper about a half hour before licht benching, it's the only way I make it through!
This way, we're not all zonked and starving!
Back to top

amother
Orange


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:24 pm
Why would you think you are a wierdo? How many people you know are just so upbeat at this time of this day?

Last edited by amother on Wed, May 03 2017, 2:36 pm; edited 1 time in total
Back to top

esuss




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:46 pm
It sounds like I am in the minority. I look forward to the Seder the whole year. Us wives put in so much work into it and so much effort to make it special for ourselves and our children how could it not be the most special night.
I work almost full time, my children have been home from school also for too long, I am making Pesach also. But there is something magical in the night that we spent the past weeks preparing for.
I try to be super organized. Get as much help as is available. Do everything early. I keep to a minimum what I leave to do on Erev Pesach. Everyone naps and then we all eat a supper meal late in day.
We have to keep a positive attitude and that will be contagious and everyone else will be excited for this night. Magid does not have to be long and drawn out. Singing together could be so beautiful. Kids could act out leaving mitzrayim and the maccos.
I use disposable and warm all food in tinpans. This minimizes cleanup afterward.
Back to top

amother
Cerise


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:50 pm
You are so lucky all of you. I am so alone. Just dreading the loneliness and shame. Count your blessings and it should be all in good health.
Back to top

amother
Orange


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 9:53 pm
Deleted

Last edited by amother on Wed, May 03 2017, 2:38 pm; edited 1 time in total
Back to top

LittleDucky




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 10:33 pm
We do things differently. We sat down the first year we made Seder and decided what WE need to do to make it a happy and as low stress as possible. No long divrei Torah. (We might "split up" the Seder so that everyone doesn't talk on he same parts... Each person has a section to share a thought on.) We have lunches to speak at as well... We are not such a singing family so we do the minimum. Plus we usually have guests so Kol Isha issues anyways.
We aren't done by 10 but we also aren't still up at 2.
We have littles who won't be staying up and get up at dawn no matter what. So we need sleep!

Do what you need to do. It is a family oriented night so figure out how to make it work best for you.
Back to top

Seas




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 11:03 pm
Our seder lasts for hours but almost no divrei Torah. Instead DH just tells the story of yetzias mitzrayim.

Yes I get tired towards the end but it's beautiful.
Back to top

sourstix




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 11:22 pm
Op really ment that right ow she's so exhausted that it's hard for her to. Look forward to the Seder.

Op now your exhausted. Imyh you will get a real long good nap tomorrow and you will feel more positive?
Back to top

amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 11:28 pm
Sorry, no nap at all. My kids dont nap. Maybe youngest wI'll fall asleep in car if I drive around, he's almost four. I just won't nap no matter what. I'm am extremely light sleeper, it just doesn't work
Back to top

amother
Blonde


 

Post Sun, Apr 09 2017, 11:55 pm
amother wrote:
Sorry, no nap at all. My kids dont nap. Maybe youngest wI'll fall asleep in car if I drive around, he's almost four. I just won't nap no matter what. I'm am extremely light sleeper, it just doesn't work


So don't nap. Sit down with a good book (or a Hagadda!) and insist that no one talks to you for two hours. Or take a walk, or listen to music, whatever recharges your batteries.
Back to top

33055




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Apr 10 2017, 12:12 am
octopus wrote:
No, you are not a weirdo! I happen to enjoy pesach, but every year the seder disappoints. And the only reason is because I'm usually so exhausted by the first seder night, I just can't enjoy it, and I can barely get up to serve. Forget about cleanup! The first days are a fog of washing dishes and picking up the house. But I usually recover chol hamoed and enjoy the last days. One year I fell asleep at the seder at the table, in front of my inlaws. How embarrassing! We have limits to divrei torah and how many kids can say. Getting past mah nishtana takes forever because each kid needs a turn. We are not such a singing family and that usually goes fast. We usually end by midnight, but if it ended any later, I would be a basket case.


One year? Every year, I end up nodding off. This is why I don't go away or have people over.
Back to top

jflower




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Apr 10 2017, 6:45 am
amother wrote:
You are so lucky all of you. I am so alone. Just dreading the loneliness and shame. Count y
our blessings and it should be all in good health.


Cerise, that sounds so hard. Is there no one in your community who will invite you?
Back to top

FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Apr 10 2017, 6:52 am
OP, I bentch you that your kids should be adorable, funny, and fascinated by the seder.

You should get a second wind of koach during the seder, and enjoy every minute of it.

May your yom tov be full of wonderful surprises, with ease and joy.

We all have our own Mitzrayim, but this is the time of our freedom. May we all see freedom from whatever feels like our personal slavery! Hug
Back to top

amother
Orange


 

Post Mon, Apr 10 2017, 7:01 am
[quote="FranticFrummie"]

Last edited by amother on Wed, May 03 2017, 2:39 pm; edited 1 time in total
Back to top
Page 1 of 2 1  2  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Pesach

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Online links for Girls Yom Tov dresses
by amother
1 Today at 12:55 pm View last post
Please help me purchase toys for Yom Tov
by amother
23 Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:45 pm View last post
Ba’al Shem Tov library
by amother
7 Wed, Mar 20 2024, 9:27 am View last post
Im al Hamelech Tov- who sings it?
by amother
3 Sat, Mar 16 2024, 10:18 pm View last post
Rabbi Shimon Ben Tov - mekoubal and mezouzea see-er 20 Thu, Mar 14 2024, 2:56 pm View last post