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Forum -> Household Management -> Finances
Seems like it always comes down to money :(



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amother
Jade


 

Post Tue, Apr 25 2017, 5:12 pm
As a recipient unfortunately of the mitzvah of a few shivas myself I have personally witnessed at what lengths people extend themselves to Be menachem avel others

I have been up since 3:00 am thinking What could I have done to have been able to manage the cost of travelling to pay a shiva visit to see the family of my best friend from childhood.

I am feeling so sorry for myself and know that if I would have gone it would mean so much to Them.
Y does everyone I see around me have a normal stable life and I just CANT seem to get it right?????
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amother
Brown


 

Post Tue, Apr 25 2017, 5:19 pm
Please don't be so hard on yourself.
I'm sure they would really appreciate it if you would have gone but if you couldn't that understandable also.
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doctorima




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Apr 25 2017, 6:45 pm
If money was tight and you couldn't make it, don't beat yourself up over it. What's done is done. Anyway, during the shiva is when so many people come, but now she may need you even more. Could you make a heartfelt phone call, which I'm sure she would greatly appreciate?
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amother
Slateblue


 

Post Tue, Apr 25 2017, 7:39 pm
I think you shouldnt feel so bad about it. If you are in a different city or country, it is standard for people to call during the shiva instead of visiting. Sometimes the aveilim even feel bad that people have put themselves out so mcuh to travel in to see them, missing work, leaving their kids etc.

right now, my niehgbor and his kids are sitting shiva for their middle aged wife adn mother Sad . Knowing this man, I can imagine him being upset that people apart from close family are traveling in from out of town, as he hates to put people out. I think most other people sitting shiva would feel that way too.
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crust




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Apr 25 2017, 8:10 pm
amother wrote:
As a recipient unfortunately of the mitzvah of a few shivas myself I have personally witnessed at what lengths people extend themselves to Be menachem avel others

I have been up since 3:00 am thinking What could I have done to have been able to manage the cost of travelling to pay a shiva visit to see the family of my best friend from childhood.

I am feeling so sorry for myself and know that if I would have gone it would mean so much to Them.
Y does everyone I see around me have a normal stable life and I just CANT seem to get it right?????



How much would it cost you to get there?
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