New to ADHD land, advice needed

iriska_meller

Thu, May 04 2017, 12:30 pm

Good morning ladies,
So my 7 year old DS is showing all signs of ADHD, inattentive type. I had him seen by psychotherapist and a neurologist who mostly agree on this diagnosis. I am arranging the psychoeducational testing for for him to rule out any confounding conditions/disabilities and have also requested an eval through the school district.
Here is where I need help:
Both neurologist and psychotherapist agreed that he has a strong component of anxiety in addition to ADHD. He will need ongoing therapy and I would like him to get evaluated and perhaps treated by a psychiatrist. However, I cannot find any childhood psychiatrist or therapist that accepts insurance! I paid for a few sessions with therapist out of pocket but, in addition to testing costs, it is just becoming unsustainable for me. I have united healthcare HMO which does not cover out of network, which is what most psychiatrists accept.
Any advice?
I am looking in Manhattan, near upstate, Westchester, northern NJ
Is there a way he can get psychotherapy through school? So far they only talked about OT for him.
In general, is there anything else I should be doing?
Thank you!

amother

Navy

Thu, May 04 2017, 1:15 pm

I understand that you're working with professionals but I want to point out that anxiety (unmanaged) can look a whole lot like ADHD. I would not rush into ADHD diagnosis and treatment before really seeing how he does once the anxiety is under control. Even if he continues to present with ADHD symptoms at that point, you will have addressed the anxiety, which is probably more debilitating to him anyway.

iriska_meller

Thu, May 04 2017, 1:34 pm

Amother Navy, thank you, I've thought about it. The issue is, he is too young to do CBT which would be (supposedly?) effective, and his symptoms are not debilitating enough to warrant medication treatment for anxiety (essentially I was told since he is sleeping, eating and not refusing to leave the house he is too young to be medicated). I'm hoping the psychoed testing will give some more definitive answers. It will probably take many months until any effect of regular therapy will show, in the meanwhile he will fall further behind in school. And I can't afford to be paying for therapy out of pocket right now anyway...

amother

Navy

Thu, May 04 2017, 3:48 pm

There are many options for treating anxiety in children without medicating- it's incredibly common. Any child psychologist can teach you techniques if you prefer to just go in yourself once every couple of weeks for a while.

amother

White

Thu, May 04 2017, 4:46 pm

As a long time sufferer of anxiety (and ADHD), therapy is crucial. Just because the anxiety isn't completely debilitating (e.g. he's eating, sleeping, and leaving the house), that does not mean that he is not suffering or that it doesn't need to be taken care of ASAP. There is a lot of ground between suffering from anxiety and not being able to leave the house, and you want to take care of it before it gets that bad. A child psychologist who has a lot of experience with anxiety is often better than a psychiatrist at this age (and this generally can't be done through school). But there is plenty they can do. And I disagree that the therapist can teach you to treat your son yourself - in most cases, this is really not enough. Unfortunately, insurance is not great about covering these things. Have you called your insurance and spoken with them? Asked them how you can get covered for this?

iriska_meller

Thu, May 04 2017, 7:09 pm

Another white, can you guide me in how should I approach therapy? Do I need to be in the room with him and therapist? Should I ask her to teach me things she are doing with him? How often is OK? I can probably swing twice a month... Also I'm a single mom who works two jobs, so I may have to rely on my nanny to bring him on occasion. oy.

amother

Blonde

Thu, May 04 2017, 7:27 pm

Since you said you are looking in Northern NJ, The Jewish Board of Family Services (JFS) in Passaic takes insurance and treats children.
Lots of hugs and empathy to you, I've been there.

seeker

Thu, May 04 2017, 10:07 pm

One point you mentioned is whether he can get therapy in school. It depends on the school and can be hard to find a provider, but if you can make a case that the anxiety affects his school performance and participation, then the department of ed could mandate school-based counseling for him.

However, if the school does not have a counselor, it can be difficult to find counselors willing to cover dept of ed cases. So keep looking through insurance to cover all bases. Wish I had a better recommendation. You mentioned Manhattan, I know JBFCS has branches there as well, not sure if they are convenient to you. https://jewishboard.org/

amother

White

Fri, May 05 2017, 6:46 am

iriska_meller wrote:

You should NOT be in the room with him during therapy. Ironically, kids have an easier time opening up about some things when their parents aren't there. Having a nanny bring him is ok, since she'll just be waiting in the waiting room like you would. There may be sessions that will include you as well, but it won't be every time.

Definitely get advice and guidance from the therapist after each session, because the best thing you can do is work with the therapist and also help your child implement whatever the therapist is trying to get him to do.

Twice a month could be ok. Talk to the therapist upfront about how to make it work.

NJ JFS is also a good idea, as a different poster suggested. They have services in lots of different places in NJ.

sarahmalka

Thu, May 11 2017, 8:42 pm

I just heard about something called "loophole insurance." I'm not in NY state though, not sure how this differs from state to state. At any rate, it's supposed to help offset these medical expenses although it does limit which providers you can see depending on who accepts it. I think it's almost like medicaid for kids...? But not necessarily income based, more based on the medical needs of the kid. Anyway, google it for your state.

amother

Taupe

Thu, May 11 2017, 9:36 pm

amother wrote:

I would have to agree. My son was diagnosed with Adhd, on meds, was treated for anxiety by OTs and got off the medication. The diagnosis are very connected. The OTs who worked with him are running a teleconference for the community to raise funds for changing the educational system and provide education and support to parents. One of their questions may help you OP. Here's the link:

Parent Empowerment Teleconference