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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Shavuos

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debsey

Mon, May 29 2017, 12:54 pm

I'm just not in the mood of cooking.

Dk why.

I usually love Shavuous cooking. I like dairy food and cheesecake and cooking for fancy Y"T meals.

I looked through all the publications. No recipes stirred my interest and made me say "Yeah, can't wait to try that"

Looked at all my old menus. Probably going to use the one from two years ago, with a few tweaks.

It just feels like WORK, which it never does for me. I even completed a big work project early so I could devote this afternoon and tomorrow to cooking, but I just don't want to.

That was just my vent. Feel free to go back to experimenting with your cheesecake or whatever.

amother

Gray

Mon, May 29 2017, 1:37 pm

Welcome to my world! I'm never in the mood of cooking. Wish it wasn't such a big part of frum life. Just not a foodie, I guess. Sometimes I wonder if something's wrong wth me.

icebreaker

Mon, May 29 2017, 2:01 pm

I can completely relate. Luckily, it'll be just me, my ex-husband, our children, and my youngest sister so I don't have to go all out like I would do if we had other guests.

amother

Mustard

Mon, May 29 2017, 2:56 pm

Debsey... I'm shocked and disillusioned
You are the last poster here I would of expected to say that... Surprised

Maybe you should get your iron and magnesium levels tested
Are you getting enough sleep

crust

Mon, May 29 2017, 3:02 pm

amother wrote:

Debsey... I'm shocked and disillusioned
You are the last poster here I would of expected to say that... Surprised

Maybe you should get your iron and magnesium levels tested
Are you getting enough sleep

And I appreciate her for posting non anonymously.
She validates that we are all human. We can all have ups and yes; downs!!

cnc

Mon, May 29 2017, 3:03 pm

crust wrote:

And I appreciate her for posting non anonymously.
She validates that we are all human. We can all have ups and yes; downs!!

This!!

Zehava

Mon, May 29 2017, 3:08 pm

Lol my husband always wants to know why I don't make fancy food like everyone else.
And I don't know why
Does anyone actually enjoy cooking? Must be nice.

Emotional

Mon, May 29 2017, 3:11 pm

icebreaker wrote:

I can completely relate. Luckily, it'll be just me, my ex-husband, our children, and my youngest sister so I don't have to go all out like I would do if we had other guests.

Totally off topic, but this begs for a question...
Your ex-husband eats meals with you?

debsey

Mon, May 29 2017, 7:57 pm

amother wrote:

Debsey... I'm shocked and disillusioned
You are the last poster here I would of expected to say that... Surprised

Maybe you should get your iron and magnesium levels tested
Are you getting enough sleep

Why disillusioned? Did you think I was a robot?

I'm not really a cook. It's just not my thing. I don't mind cooking for my family and for Y"T, because I love the Y"T itself, but cooking isn't something I love. I like being in the kitchen with my kids and all working together and joking around, but I don't particularly enjoy the actual act of cooking.

The one Y"T I usually love cooking for is Shavuous. I love milchig food. I love that I can be creative at a lot of meals because there are no restrictions, like on Pesach, and it's not the sheer volume of Succos, so I can make something that's more of a patchke.

This year, the cooking is just not that exciting. It's mostly because I'm hosting a guest who has specific dietary restrictions, and I'm trying to accommodate them, which means I'm not making any recipes that really interest me. I'm happy to host this person, but I'm just not really in the mood of cooking the foods that work for her and that my kids will still eat.

It feels like a chore, instead of this interesting activity. Usually, I'm all about "Oh, cool, I would love to make a milchig black forest cake and homemade calzones." Now it's more, cross this off my list. Next this...etc.

It's not a big deal, I'm not really upset, just surprising myself a bit by how not enthusiastic I feel about the cooking. Don't worry, I'll still do the whole yeshivishe lady "I'm so proud my husband is learning Torah" thing on Shavuous itself. I just won't enjoy the (specialty/restricted) cheesecake all that much.

debsey

Mon, May 29 2017, 7:58 pm

crust wrote:

And I appreciate her for posting non anonymously.
She validates that we are all human. We can all have ups and yes; downs!!

Thanks crust and cnc! Cool

amother

cornflower

Mon, May 29 2017, 8:16 pm

Not in the mood of cooking AND I feel like cooking turns me into a snappy, impatient mom when my kids are in the kitchen underfoot. So if you laugh and joke with them while working, that's amazing!

asmileaday

Mon, May 29 2017, 8:30 pm

Zehava wrote:

Lol my husband always wants to know why I don't make fancy food like everyone else.
And I don't know why
Does anyone actually enjoy cooking? Must be nice.

I do not like cooking but I love baking decadent junky desserts. I usually end up making more desserts than real food. And then we'll just have a simple roast and chicken soup.... But hey, my kids love that! They associate yom tov with which desserts I usually make.

Reesa

Mon, May 29 2017, 8:38 pm

I'm in the mood to eat..... I just wish someone else prepared all the food!

I'm with you about not being in the mood this time. It feels like we just did pesach!

debsey

Mon, May 29 2017, 9:38 pm

Reesa wrote:

I'm in the mood to eat..... I just wish someone else prepared all the food!

I'm with you about not being in the mood this time. It feels like we just did pesach!

I'm in the mood to eat the yummy cake on your picture! (But not in the mood of cooking it)

amother

Jade

Mon, May 29 2017, 10:14 pm

Emotional wrote:

Totally off topic, but this begs for a question...
Your ex-husband eats meals with you?

I'm not the poster you were asking, but my (long) divorced parents eat meals together for many holidays. They both want to see as many of their kids as possible--especially now that we all are off and married ourselves, we're already gone to in-laws some of the time. I think it's for the best when divorced couples care more about spending time with their children than avoiding each other.

imasinger

Tue, May 30 2017, 3:33 am

I always get torn between wanting each person to have Shabbos/YT food that will help make their day special, and the varying tastes of each family member. Whatever one person loves, another one hates. Jack Sprat and his wife on steroids.

In your situation, Debsey, I'd make that black forest cake, and then have something else for the guest with special dietary needs. Unless they are under 15, they should be well able to handle seeing food on a table that they can't eat.

My own solution is to make one thing that each person loves. And if for this meal, DD needs to leave the table because she is repulsed by the smell of sushi, and for that one, DS needs to leave because he is repulsed by the smell of meat, so be it.

It's an imperfect solution, because it might be just as overwhelming a preparation being a short order cook for all as it is limiting the menu because of the limits of one. But so be it. I generally find cooking an activity I tolerate, rather than get excited about. And preparing everything is stressful. But I like eating good food and pleasing the people I love, so I put on something good to listen to, and will be taking short breaks to go play the piano while something is in the oven, whenever I can today.

Have a wonderful Yom Tov, and may the other delights of the day supersede the menu.

watergirl

Tue, May 30 2017, 3:52 am

imasinger wrote:

I agree with this - but in the past when ai've hosted and done this, I was told even during the meal how much I've offended the guest for making something knowing she cant eat it. With multiple guests. So you never know...

Sadie

Tue, May 30 2017, 4:01 am

watergirl wrote:

You were told this by the guest? That would get the guest crossed off my invite list. I'm a vegetarian, so if I took this tack I would quickly find myself with nowhere to eat. One of my best friends is a vegan and a frequent shabbos guest, and our table always has something with dairy or eggs that she can't eat.

Make that Black Forest cake, debsey!

Ruchel

Tue, May 30 2017, 4:33 am

Go for quick, easy, tempting or buy. My great grandmothers/great great etc very often had maids. I don't. A wife is not a cook.

debsey

Tue, May 30 2017, 9:50 am

Thanks imasinger and watergirl - she's definitely the type who will be offended if I served something she can't eat.

It's OK, I'm almost done cooking now. I want to "have cooked Y"T" not to 'cook Y"T'

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