Can't stand the mess no $ for cleaning help

amother

Cerise

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 9:30 pm

My house is always messy - except when I light the shabbos candles. Even then, it is so so.

I wish I could afford cleaning help, but I can't. The kids do help some, but not nearly enough.

I just can't keep up with it all... and I don't have the strength to work on cleaning up all night long every single night.

Advice?

amother

Brown

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 9:41 pm

Purge possessions. Keep just a few changes of clothes for each. Same for everything else. Easier to maintain and keep things in place. Use wipes to keep surfaces clean.

amother

Puce

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 9:45 pm

I find laundry baskets helpful.
All mess goes in the laundry basket and then it's easy to stash away.
If you have 2 or more you can sort what goes in the bedrooms, what goes in the playroom etc.

amother

Cerise

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 9:46 pm

amother wrote:

Purge possessions. Keep just a few changes of clothes for each. Same for everything else. Easier to maintain and keep things in place. Use wipes to keep surfaces clean.

Dishes? We use disposable a lot, but it still builds up like crazy.

We cleaned up the PR today and then I went and did st else and came back and it was messed up. We keep most of what we don't use in the basement or throw it out, but it is still hard to keep what we do have neat. And the mess from food...

amother

Tan

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 9:58 pm

amother wrote:

I don't own real dishes.
Weekends are a killer for my household nangement. I simply don't manage.

zaq

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 10:17 pm

Have less stuff.
Clean as you go.
Use bins and baskets to stash things out of the way to create a sense of order.
Teach the kids to do more as they grow
Trust the kids to do more than you think they're capable of.
Accept that they won't do a perfect job.
Accept that a house with young children will never look as spiffy as one with adults only.
Find a neighbor whose house is messier than yours and visit often to gain perspective.

CDL

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 10:57 pm

Try to convince yourself that one day you'll be able to afford plenty of cleaning help, and this is only a temporary situation.
This is the only thing that works for me. The mess makes me crazy and I'm really, really not domesticated. Hopefully my wishes will come true one day. If not, at least the thought keeps me going for now...

amother

Coffee

Mon, Jul 03 2017, 11:23 pm

Don't emotionalize the mess.
Observe without judgment.
Don't define yourself according to your housekeeping.
When there's less emotion involved it's easier to just do the tasks necessary to maintain the house. DO as much as you have time and energy for. Endorse yourself for whatever you manage to do. Forgive yourself for whatever you don't manage to do.
(Thank you, Miriam Adahan!)

amother

Honeydew

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 12:44 am

I tell myself every little bit helps. I might not be able to organize all the cabinets, closets, laundry, etc. But I have time to clean the freezer. Isn't that nice? And then tomorrow three bottom cabinets. Don't they look lovely?

The house is flying, it needs a deep clean. I will go from room to room and throw things in the garbage. Then take out the garbage. Ahh. Nice. Things are picking up around here.

The next day I might wash the dishes. And the kitchen floor!

Soon enough...it really does add up. And it feels lovely.

amother

Gold

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 2:53 am

Laundry
*Each kid has their own hamper. Age 10 and up can fold their own laundry. No towels, buy each kid their own bathrobe and wash it - once every 2 weeks or so. use a lot of paper towels instead of kitchen towels.
* One great idea is to pay a high school girl to babysit at night and give her a little extra to do the laundry. If you do this once a week, makes a huge difference.
* put all mismatched socks in a bag. After two weeks any socks that don't match throw out.
* Just disposable dishes for during the week
*Kids clean up their toys once a day. allocate jobs, Age 7 and up can make beds. every night have a half an hour cleanup with prizes so you can wake up to a cleaner house...

amother

Cerise

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 3:25 am

I have lowered my standards, but lately, it really is bothering me. Maybe other areas of my life being messy are affecting how I see this.

Bedtime always happens late enough that I can't push it off more by giving each kid a daily chore. They help Fridays and Sundays, with basic things in between. We use disposables already... but pots, pans, water bottles... the sink fills up pretty quickly.

I couldn't sleep so I will go wash some dishes now...

amother

Cerise

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 3:41 am

shevi82 wrote:

Can you get a girl to help you with laundry and dishes? It will cost less then cleaning help and will make a big difference.

Interesting that so many ppl mentioned laundry. That is far from my main issue.

I could theoretically get a girl to come clean the PR with my kids every day and wash dishes, but I can imagine that would actually be a lot harder to find that we would all hope. I will keep it in mind and see who I can find.

May

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 6:36 am

In my experience, these girls aren't much cheaper than an actual cleaning lady, and they don't do as good of a job and can't be asked to do a lot of things I'd ask a cleaning lady to do. If money is tight, I don't think that is the solution. (And yes, hard to find.)

33055

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 6:39 am

What about DH? Why can't he help?

Have the kids put away their stuff as soon as they are done. They can't play with the next item until they put away the last one.

Cook one pan meals or try the foil packs. You can also use the crockpot with a liner. Buy pre-cut vegetables and other prepared foods like pre breaded chicken cutlets. Keep the kitchen clean as you work.

amother

Puce

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 7:19 am

You've mentioned the kitchen
You just need a routine

Do you work

If not then this is easier.

Why do you use pots and pans
You can make everything in the oven in disposable pans.
I mean everything, even omletes.
You want it scrambled take a fork and scramble it up.
Leftovers stay in the pan until you are ready to throw the pan out.
No more changing it to a smaller Tupperware.

everything disposable
Teach the kids and DH to throw out there own stuff after they eat
Wipe everything down with Clorox wipes.
Sweep

When cooking clean as you go.
Put everything away as soon as you finish making that dish, before you start on the next.
Wash all the bowls used.

When measuring ingredients out do it in the sink, so if there is a spill, it's in the sink.

No one does ANYTHING after dinner until the kitchen is clean, including DH.
IF DH needs to go learn, he can go learn after his plate is clean and all the disposable pans with food are foiled and put away.

If everyone gives 10 minutes, your kitchen can be clean every night, before you go to sleep, and you wake up to clean kitchen.

LittleDucky

Tue, Jul 04 2017, 10:19 am

I am split about disposables... They are amazing for hectic days and my sanity but they cost so much (when you add up how many you use in a day, week, month) and it makes it that much harder to stop using them.
I do use them honestly (sanity trumps almost anything some days!!!) but lately I have tried to use fewer.
What I try to do is do a 5 minute pickup every night plus periodically during the day. I have 3 minutes before I need to leave the house? Put away dried dishes from last night. Have everyone get involved- 5 minutes before dinner, 5 after...Even toddlers can get in on it- you just have to be specific in the tasks you give them.