Do you wish happy birthday to your brother in law?

hannah22

Tue, Sep 12 2017, 3:02 am

Apologies if this is a stupid question!

My brother in law (to be) has birthday his birthday today. I have never met him, but of course my sister has spoken about me to him as we are close to each other. I've spoken to him on whatsapp a bit but quite distant.
Do you send a message to your brother in law to say happy birthday?
Thanks!

ruchelbuckle

Tue, Sep 12 2017, 3:30 am

Sure. It's a nice thing to do, and will only create positive feelings. I don't think anything bad ever came out of wishing someone a happy birthday.

I don't have that much to do with my sisters husband, but I do try to send a card for his birthday and Father's Day. At worst, he shrugs. At best, it makes my parents happy that we are all getting along. 😀

amother

Crimson

Tue, Sep 12 2017, 3:54 am

Yes. Happens to be he has the same birthday as one of my kids so it's easy to remember, but I was doing it before that kid was born. I wish all mine and dhs siblings a happy birthday.

amother

Mint

Tue, Sep 12 2017, 4:21 am

hannah22 wrote:

I think it's a very tricky question because you are obviously coming from a culture in which many of the so called "normal" things that other people do, are frowned upon or outright forbidden in your culture. It's difficult to give advice or suggestions across party lines so to speak as the rules, specifically with regard to what is tznius are very different. I guess it depends exactly what level of extremism your sect holds by as your BIL (to be) might be offended (or even shocked) that you would consider such a thing.

33055

Tue, Sep 12 2017, 4:54 am

amother wrote:

OP is on WhatsApp with her brother in law already, so she is not so extreme. In the extreme circles, they don't celebrate birthdays - certainly not English birthdays.

I always wish DH's brother HB via email and cc or bcc DH. (DH always copies me on communication with his family.) One of my bils doesn't have text, so it is not so easy with him. I ignore his BD or say tell my sis HB to him if we are speaking and she mentions his BD.