Is this normal? A question about My 3 year old

amother

Wine

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 2:06 am

She hardly plays with toys. She is very happy to be in her room and listen to story tapes. Her teacher asked me about this. Do u have a child like this? I don't know if this is normal. She doesn't join the kids playing. I'm not sure if she interacts with others at all. She is quiet by nature. Happy to be with herself. Whenever I ask her if she wants to play with others she says "no". My husband is also not social so no surprised but this is a bit too much for me being extroverted.

amother

Linen

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 2:34 am

Both me and my dh were like this. He said he never had best friends as kids. He read books. He knows all sorts of weird stuff. He is really introverted and smart. He did horrible in school though. He didn't figure out on his own to take notes and no one taught him or showed him how until we married. People from his past are so surprised when they learn how successful he is today at learning, work and home bh.

amother

Peach

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 2:37 am

Is her level of speech age appropriate? Is her overall development normal or were there any delays?
Does she interact normally with you and her father (and siblings, if there are)?

To me it seems a bit too withdrawn. I would recommend having her checked out by professionals (children's doctor, psycologist...)
If they say she's okay, all the better.
However, if there is a problem, it's better to catch it early.

amother

Wine

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 2:38 am

I must say she definitely does interact with my son at home. She's not good with people she doesn't know. Has never been in a playgroup or babysitter. All of sudden she is in a classroom with 26 kids. I told the teacher it will definitely take her time. Till she gets used to it. I am worried. Should I be?

amother

Wine

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 2:46 am

Her speech is a little delayed. She has congenital hypothyroidism. Her thyroid is almost non existent. Not sure that has anything to do. She sometimes has a hard time saying what she wants. It takes her a few tries till she gets it out.

My sister is an ot and said she's fine speech wise. My sister works for the boe and is in this for many years. Says she is very average. I will run this by her again and see what she says.

I do worry that she doesn't join in playing with others though. I will give it a little more time and see.

amother

Blonde

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 2:52 am

My 3 yr old was like that turned out she was selective mute. She had little contact with kids before that other than her siblings and went to a classroom of 20. Now she loves friends but loves to play on her own too.

amother

Blonde

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 3:18 am

It took time for my daughter to get to know her teacher than her teacher included her in as much as my daughter would let she was the one to give out treats to class. once other children noticed her we began inviting one kid at a time home to play. We saw who she took the most intrest in and and invited that kid more often until she got cofortable with that child in and out of school

Simple1

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 5:02 am

That's a very large class size for that age. She may do better in a smaller group, especially for a withdrawn child.

Tzutzie

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 5:12 am

Simple1 wrote:

That's a very large class size for that age. She may do better in a smaller group, especially for a withdrawn child.

That was the first thing that popped out for me.
26 kids is a LOT. My 4 yo has 18 with two teachers and I thought that was a large group for that age. Especially it being the frst time in such a setting.

amother

Sapphire

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 5:44 am

my dd is 3. That sounds like a large class size. How many teachers are there? Both my girls like to know the names of the other kids in their class and they are friendly children who beg for playdates. Being part of a large class of unknown people can be unsettling.

monseymom25

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 6:36 am

Some of my children are very shy and have been selective mute at this age. My pediatrician told me that they are still young. Don't pressure them.
Give her time. She is young and has just started a very new experience. I think that if she interacts normally with people she knows and feels comfortable with them you have no reason to worry at this point. It's still the very beginning of the year. Let her know it's fine to play alone or with the other kids and that as she gets to know the kids and teachers better she might want to play with them more. And that either way is okay with you.
Reevaluate the situation in March or April and I hope you'll see growth.

amother

Orchid

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 6:38 am

I think it warrants further investigation. Even very shy or introverted kids will still typically have a few friends. It's not necessary to be popular or the life of the party, but it is necessary to learn to play with other kids and make a friend or two. My oldest was just like this at this age and he has autism. I'm not saying that to scare you or to give an armchair diagnosis, only to tell you that it is somewhat concerning and should be looked into. And my son was (and is) perfectly happy with how things are, I don't think he even realizes that he's different from his peers, but that doesn't mean he doesn't need every bit of the therapies he gets. I'd urge you to keep an eye this, for sure. Also, I agree with the others, that is a huge class for 3 year olds.

amother

Vermilion

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 6:42 am

amother wrote:

I think your sister gave you bad advice. It sounds like she could benefit from speech therapy. It's not too late to get evaluated through cpse though. The hypothyroidism can make her low energy, is she being followed by a doctor for that?

LovesHashem

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 7:29 am

Kids can react like that to stress, or trauma also (What everyone else said is also correct, here's just a bit more I'm adding). I was born into a stressful and also abusive family, I was misdiagnoed with autism since I was terrified of people.

MyUsername

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 1:56 pm

I would start the process of getting her evaluated (maybe neuropsychiatrist or developmental neurologist).

But, in parallel, I would set up playdates for her one on one in your home with the kids in her class - this will give you a better sense of what she's like socially and also allow her to feel comfortable interacting with the kids in school.

amother

Seashell

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 2:07 pm

anonymrs wrote:

Are you satisfied with how her thyroid is being treated?

One of the symptoms of hypothyroidism is brainfog -I experience this-losing my words not remembering the names of items for a couple of seconds.
It could be what she's experiencing.

amother

Tan

Tue, Sep 19 2017, 3:19 pm

LovesHashem wrote:

I am with you in this one.