Calling all mothers of boys!! Bathroom etiquette?

amother

Burlywood

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 12:37 am

2 out of my 4 boys are toilet trained and I need to get this straight before training my toddler. Oldest boy stands when he goes, and is doing fine bh. but second boy will only go while sitting. He will wet the walls otherwise. When I tell him that he's gotta learn he will stand but push his body part down so not to spray in all directions. Is this normal? I know it can be fixed by a euroligist, and Dr asked to see him. But my husband claims it's not a problem to touch oneself when going. What do you think?

RebekahsMom

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 12:48 am

I’m not sure what the question is. If he is pointed correctly, the question is whether the hole that it comes out of (urethra) is positioned properly at the tip. If not, the problem is known as hypospadias, and is easily correctable with surgery.

amother

Coral

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 12:49 am

I wouldn't be happy if my boys would always have to touch themselves when using the bathroom.

I would recommend you shld follow your doc and see a urologist. Can be fixed easily and many boys have done it.

mommy3b2c

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 12:59 am

amother wrote:

So he shouldn't touch himself and spray all over the wall?

Please get this straight:

There is nothing wrong with touching yourself so that you pee into the toilet. Just like there is nothing wrong with touching yourself to wipe yourself. By telling your son he can't touch himself, you are setting him up for a life of confusion.

amother

Coral

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 1:18 am

Why would someone be interested their kid should have to touch themselves all the time, when its no big deal to have small procedure and avoid it??

amother

cornflower

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 1:20 am

RebekahsMom wrote:

if this is the case please talk to your pediatrician. My dh's was never corrected. He wishes it was.

DrMom

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 1:21 am

Maybe the toilet is too high for him and he'll start using the toilet standing up when he gets taller.

He just started toilet training. Unless there is an actual urological problem, why worry him and yourself over this?

mommy3b2c

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 1:27 am

amother wrote:

Why would someone be interested their kid should have to touch themselves all the time, when its no big deal to have small procedure and avoid it??

Interested in their kid touching themselves???

Odd way of looking at it.

If there is truly an anatomical issue, then by all means they should get it fixed. More likely scenario: he's a little boy who needs some help aiming.

Iymnok

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 2:13 am

With ds1 he loved making a splash.
I have heard of making a game of 'drown the cheerios'.
A waterproof sticker in the toilet to aim at.

Both of my sons go without using their hands to aim, for the most part.

I never understood teaching a boy to use the toilet while sitting. Though if making #2, they need to urinate, they push the appropriate anatomical limb down.

Have you asked your dh advice on what's normal? Have him talk to ds, or take him a couple times.

MagentaYenta

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 3:18 am

amother wrote:

Why would someone be interested their kid should have to touch themselves all the time, when its no big deal to have small procedure and avoid it??

That's a pretty ignorant statement. Boys with this condition needn't touch themselves all the time, only when they need to aim for urination. Not every parent thinks this is a condition that needs fixing.

Frankly I don't understand this attitude, men need to handle their peni$es when they urinate, if they don't you have a mess.

amother

Taupe

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 6:16 am

Some hold you touch it through tp. Maybe that can help. Anon because despite Ima being an Orthodox site, it is all about free body.

mommy3b2c

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 8:40 am

amother wrote:

Some hold you touch it through tp. Maybe that can help. Anon because despite Ima being an Orthodox site, it is all about free body.

Oy vavoy.

little_mage

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 9:00 am

My six year old boy still sits when peeing. At some point, I suppose we'll have to teach him to go standing up, but we haven't done so yet.

amother

Burlywood

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 10:07 am

DrMom wrote:

Kid is 5 now. Didn't just toilet train him. And he's tall enough to reach. I go with him to the bathroom most of the time and see that he must push down very hard in order to aim.

amother

Slateblue

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 10:24 am

amother wrote:

Kid is 5 now. Didn't just toilet train him. And he's tall enough to reach. I go with him to the bathroom most of the time and see that he must push down very hard in order to aim.

I'm lost - what is the etiquette question that you are asking?

simcha2

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 11:27 am

Boys are different sizes, lengths, point in different directions. Some boys (and men) will always need to "direct" themselves. It's simple anatomy. There is nothing s*xual about it. It just is. Suggesting surgery for normal anatomy is ridiculous.
Ask dh. I'm sure he'll tell you. Men also need to touch to remove themselves from their underwear to use a urinal. It's just part of going to the bathroom.

icebreaker

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 11:55 am

simcha2 wrote:

Wait. People get their sons surgery so they don’t have to touch their private to use the bathroom?? I’ve seriously learned so much about being on this website. I thought it was completely normal for boys to touch.

asmileaday

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 12:03 pm

amother wrote:

Kid is 5 now. Didn't just toilet train him. And he's tall enough to reach. I go with him to the bathroom most of the time and see that he must push down very hard in order to aim.

If you are concerned that there might be a physical reason why he's having a hard time to aim then it doesn't hurt to have him checked by a urologist. His hole might be too small which causes the urine to shoot out with a lot of pressure making it hard to aim. It can lead to serious health issues later in life.

Better safe than sorry.

But there is nothing wrong with a boy having to direct his p*nis to aim if everything else is ok physically.

SixOfWands

Sun, Oct 15 2017, 12:04 pm

icebreaker wrote:

I think people are discussing different things, and there is confusion.

Some boys have a hole for their urethra that is not centered. Someone used the medical term for it, but I can't recall. That's a genuine medical condition that can be rectified with minor (AIUI) surgery. And given how annoying it must be to the boys/men, it makes sense to do it.

Some, probably most have aim issues, always or sometimes, and use their hands to direct the flow. Perfectly normal. Not m@sturb@tion or whatever the OP is worried about.