Just wondering... | Imamother

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Just wondering...

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amother

Aquamarine

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 4:01 pm

Hi there G-d
I was just wondering -
Do You feel misunderstood?
Does it bother you - or because you are G-d- Is it ok for you?
This is some of the things I've heard about You recently
You took a 3 year old girl. Gave her cancer, but sent her parents lots of 'support' in the way of doctors and good friends
You give a woman a baby! Then two weeks later snatch her husband away in a bizarre arrest - but you had lots of people write to her on the internet to show "support"
You have police come and snatch kids away from a loving family - but also send "internet support" for the grieving mother
You give a tzaddik lovely holy children - and then kill them in a house fire. And then use their father to "support" others in their emunah
You reveal the secrets of your Torah to millions of people in Europe, and then kill most of them so it can't be further disseminated
Like you kill almost all of the Slonimer Chassidim in Europe, send the Rebbe to Eretz Yisrael, have him rebuild his community to only 1300 families-but have hours sefer be one of the most popularly studied sefarim in the whole world, among ALL branches of Judaism
The Torah in these books provides emotional support for thousands of people all over the world
You have medicine available - but then it either has terrible side effects, or is super expensive and there is not enough money to buy it
Until they get - support
You let people set up schools, but then the teachers don't seem appropriate for the students
Or you make it so people can't get a place in the school
And the support is yet to come.
You give a person a mother who is abusive, them 25 years later send a therapist to.undo the damage
You let a person strive for truth and good midos, then send stumbling blocks and tests that they never seem to pass

I guess I really really really don't get You.

But I am trying so hard every day.

I am often misunderstood.

Do You feel the same way?

Is it hard for you too G-d?

Or is it ok, because after all, you are....
The Master of the Universe.

Just wondering.

Ruchel

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 4:08 pm

I like to think neshamos have agreed to their burden, before coming to Earth, and just don't remember it. I like to think there's a bigger plan and though it looks awful, much like surgery or whatever, in the end it's for good. In the end I've also chosen not to wonder but to ask G-d at 120.
Signed, daughter of survivor.

amother

Aquamarine

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 4:32 pm

Ruchel wrote:

... I've also chosen not to wonder...

Mmmm.

Chosen not to wonder.

Was it a fight with yourself?

Or a simple choice?

Ruchel

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 4:53 pm

A choice not to dwell. Not always working, but soooo much better.

vicki

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 5:33 pm

Another daughter of survivor here. I feel exactly the same as Ruchel. I've decided not to think about it. I file my questions under "open at 120"

amother

Lime

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 7:09 pm

I love your post. And I know there’s little point in trying to figure it out, but my question to god is what more do you want from me? I can’t take it anymore.

thunderstorm

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 8:53 pm

It's hard for Hashem to see his children suffering . We are in galus.

amother

Babypink

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 9:00 pm

I love your post except for the part where you say that "you're trying so hard" to understand. Ultimately, hashem allows very bad things to happen. It appears that he doesn't protect us in the way that a loving father would. The only way to make peace with this is to either make up a completely non provable theory, such as our neshama's agreed to this before they came down, or to just accept that there are NO REASONABLE, LOGICLE ANSWERS. when I became an adult I was very bothered with the bill of goods that I was taught in bais yackov, that hashem is loving, compassionate, we can depend on him as our father. As if this makes any sense. I'm beginning to come to terms that we really have no understanding of hashem and why he does certain things. I'm actually a little insulted by these attempts at some of these explanations as I feel it's a continuation of all the stuff I was fed in school.

amother

Aquamarine

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 9:19 pm

Your responses are all interesting.

This was not meant to be a "why do bad things happen to good people" post, but a

Hey G-d? You know how all the people in the world think that the world is unfair when You do things that are ultimately for the good? Like when you make earthquakes and give kids cancer and make people get abused and all that kind of stuff and people cry and complain that the world is unfair? So yeah G-d does that make You kivyachol feel sad because no one understands You? Or are You ok with it because You are, after all, G-d?

amother

Babypink

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 10:20 pm

amother wrote:

So if I understand you correctly, your question is how does hashem "feel" when he allows a child molester to molest a child? After all, he's hashem and could have stopped it. I put this question with all the others. We have 2 possible answers.
1. We can pretend that we know hashem is crying and he hates allowing this to happen. Or....
2. We really have no clue of hashem's ways, why he does things and how he "feels" about them.

ChassidishMommy

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 10:39 pm

Would you feel misunderstood by your toddler when he tantrums over your very understandable (to you) parenting?

l like to think of us in this context in relation to Gd. For us to try to understand His ways is like trying to explain the benefits of our parenting methods to a 2 year old.

Last edited by ChassidishMommy on Sat, Oct 21 2017, 11:01 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Aquamarine

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 10:46 pm

amother wrote:

So if I understand you correctly, your question is how does hashem "feel" when he allows a child molester to molest a child? .

Not exactly. More like "how does Hashem feel when I say "the fact that he died so young is a tragedy". "it's sp terrible the school did nothing to stop that child molester"

Etc

amother

Babypink

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 11:05 pm

ChassidishMommy wrote:

What you're saying is tricky because on one hand we acknowledge that hashem's wisdom is infinite and we really don't understand what's best for us. Then today during mussaf we benched rosh chodesh and we asked hashem to give is life, peace, parnassah, honor, ect. If we believe that we don't know what's best for us, and we accept that hashem does, why are we constantly giving him suggestions? Give this one a shidduch, give that one a refuah....Hashem knows best, let him handle it without advice.

ChassidishMommy

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 11:11 pm

amother wrote:

Don't you want your toddler to share with you whenever he needs something? That doesn't necessarily mean the answer will always be "yes" right away!

InnerMe

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 11:26 pm

amother wrote:

Interesting, thoughtful twist. pondering it.. it's seems to me G-d would feel 'misunderstood' but really, I don't have compassion... because well He has the power to stop these terrible thing from happening.
That may be harsh and simplistic, but these are my thoughts.

InnerMe

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 11:30 pm

And the toddler comparison seems to be a good one, but yet doesn't good parenting not leave the child kicking and screaming and in pain on a constant basis?
yes, again harsh. Don't take this the wrong way. I'm also trying to explore this..

amother

Aquamarine

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 11:31 pm

InnerMe wrote:

Ooh I loooove this.

amother

Babypink

Sat, Oct 21 2017, 11:40 pm

ChassidishMommy wrote:

Don't you want your toddler to share with you whenever he needs something? That doesn't necessarily mean the answer will always be "yes" right away!

The difference is that the toddler doesn't realize that his/her parents know best. We on the other hand, understand that hashem 100% of the time knows what's best for us. Yet we are constantly making suggestions about what hashem should do for us. Imagine being on a flight and making suggestions to the pilot about the flying altitude, speeding up, or slowing down. Ridiculous! We understand that we have no understanding of how to fly the plane and therefore keep our mouths shut. With hashem though, on one hand we say "hashem knows best, he has a master plan" but then a minute later we ask him to give us a shudduch and health.

amother

Papaya

Sun, Oct 22 2017, 12:35 am

See the end of Sefer Iyov. Iyov's companions knock themselves out to explain the tragedies, and Hashem says, more or less, I created the world and you didn't, stop complaining already. Doesn't sound at all bothered by being misunderstood.

FranticFrummie

Sun, Oct 22 2017, 4:31 am

amother wrote:

Yep. I was getting ready to post the exact same thing.

Whenever I'm feeling especially down, I read Iyov. For some reason I find it extremely comforting.

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