Is cleaning help a necessity or luxury

lavenderchimes

Fri, Nov 03 2017, 1:57 pm

I know a wonderful, kind woman who has a gorgeous home that is always shining and gleaming with cleanliness. Her children are grown, and she doesn't work. Her husband works nearly full time. She has full-time cleaning help, even on Holidays. She thinks she needs it, because she can't stand to have a few crumbs on the floor when her grandkids are over. Her perspective is valid -- and it's so nice that she is able to afford this luxury!

I know a shlucha whose house is always cluttered and messy. She doesn't like it that way. She has seven kids at home, plus a part-time job, and her husband is mind-bogglingly busy with his job plus his duties as a shluchim. They are both routinely up until at least one or two in the morning, just trying to stay on top of their lives. When she told me last year that they were getting someone to come in once a week to help clean, I was happy for her -- she needs it, if anyone does. But she would be the first to admit that it is a luxury. And it's one that she is grateful to have.

questioner

Fri, Nov 03 2017, 2:05 pm

debsey wrote:

it's not about being "too good" it's about efficiency. If you are trained as a lawyer or a surgeon or a computer programmer, there's "added value" to your time. If you can spend an hour doing brain surgery or filing a brief and earn upwards of 500.00 an hour, it doesn't make fiscal sense to iron your own shirts as a way of saving money! (Assuming you'd turn down work that pays 500.00 an hour in order to iron shirts or mop floors.) It's education level and basic common sense, not some snobby value judgment.

That's a pretty big assumption. If it is 10PM, and no surgeries scheduled until tomorrow morning, than Dr. Surgeon has no way to make $500 right now doing surgery. S/he may be able to mop their floors and save $15, which is better than nothing.

That's not to say that the money for the cleaning help isn't wisely spent, but it's often not an immediate tradeoff.
From a long-term career standpoint, Dr. Surgeon might be better off investing his/her time reading journals with new developments in surgery. From a short-term career standpoint, s/he might be better off getting some more sleep so s/he is at their best during surgery. And of course, there are all sorts of non-monetary better things to do than washing the floor - I specialize in those - but it might not actually be financially advantageous.

amother

Periwinkle

Fri, Nov 03 2017, 2:06 pm

It is fine to classify cleaning help as a luxury.
As long as you are honest and classify internet, computers, electric lighting, a refrigerator, etc. as a luxury.

Otherwise you tend to make value judgments of those who routinely have these luxuries and benefit from tuition existence for example, without understanding that the absence therof would put even the minimal tuition they are paying in jeopardy.

For example, I have tuition assistance. I also have a working stovetop but broken oven. I am using a countertop oven, to cook for my B"H large family, and the up to 20 Shabbos guests which are part of DH's job. Am I surviving? Yes. I still wouldn't classify an oven as a luxury.

Perhaps we should consider using a different term, or a phrase like "required for a decent standard of living." (There will still be different answers.)

(Of course, there are levels of cleaning help which could be classified as luxurious, but for some, the hours that they have fall into the category of "my life would fall apart without.")

debsey

Mon, Nov 06 2017, 1:29 pm

observer wrote:

Not a necessity for living, but depending on circumstances, can be a necessity for having a functional home.

I think that sums it up Smile

The way I classify "necessity" is - needed to keep the system functioning.

The way I classify "luxury" is - something that makes life pleasant but isn't necessary, system will function fine without it.

For a long time, DH and I managed with only one car. We didn't need two, he could walk to yeshiva on days I needed the car, and I generally commuted using NJ Transit, so I didn't need the car on the days I was at work/in school. A second car would have been a luxury at that point.

Fast forward 15 years, we leave very far from Yeshiva area, and I have multiple meetings a day, he does preschool carpool and he needs to get to yeshiva. So now we have a car and a minivan. No longer a luxury.

Trust me, I like my luxuries, but if I have to cut them out of my budget, so be it. But anything that makes the system function isn't a luxury anymore.