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Why Post Anonymously (Anonymous Enabled)
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happyone




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 16 2018, 11:43 pm
At least it's a hug and not an obnoxious response. It's all in how you're reading in to it. Sounds like you need a real life hug.
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Boca00




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 16 2018, 11:49 pm
Crust- Like you said, everyone gets hugs sometimes. But yes, I can think of a few posters off the top of my head that get hugged for the most innocent posts over and over.

happyone wrote:
At least it's a hug and not an obnoxious response. It's all in how you're reading in to it. Sounds like you need a real life hug.


I don't know who you are responding to, but if it's me, I don't need hugs IRL or online. Like I said, it doesn't bother me, I just think it's bizarre.

Also, you can say I'm reading into it, but that's really how the hugs are used (aside from a few select posters). Like a thumbs down button.
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Jewishfoodie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 16 2018, 11:59 pm
Okay. Superconfused again ! A HUG is a thumbs DOWN? I hug if I hear about a death lo aleinu, or a serious sounding trauma! Super passive aggressive to make a hug button a negative thing, tho I agree it's rude to pick innocuous comments and hug them.. Or to stalk!

Last edited by Jewishfoodie on Wed, Jan 17 2018, 12:01 am; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Coral


 

Post Tue, Jan 16 2018, 11:59 pm
happyone wrote:
At least it's a hug and not an obnoxious response. It's all in how you're reading in to it. Sounds like you need a real life hug.


Are you new here? Hugs are used kind of a disliked button.
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amother
Coral


 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 12:00 am
Jewishfoodie wrote:
Okay. Superconfused again ! A HUG is a thumbs DOWN?


Sort of except when op posts an issue.
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Jewishfoodie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 12:05 am
OK. Color me confused again... (they should have a 'confused' font.) I hardly hug but I do hug by trauma when I accidentally come across it. Because I would like to hug the person IRL!
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Boca00




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 12:07 am
Jewishfoodie wrote:
Okay. Superconfused again ! A HUG is a thumbs DOWN?


Sorry, I'm not so good at explaining things!
But let me try again...

1. If the post is a vent or asking advice re a painful situation, a hug is good. I feel for you. I empathize.
2. If the post is innocuous, like I ate chicken for supper or I like Pantene shampoo, then a hug is used by stalkers who just hug every post that imaxyz writes because they want to be annoying or they pity her general worldview.
3. If a post is perceived as braggy or privileged, a hug is jealous. For example, if a poster writes, "my husband wants to take me to the alps but I really want to go to France, I'm so annoyed! I went to the Alps 6 months ago!" Then a poster who hasn't left the tristate area might hug out of jealousy or feeling inferior.
4. If a post is controversial, then a hug is a dislike button.

I hope this makes more sense.
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amother
Coral


 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 12:09 am
Jewishfoodie wrote:
OK. Color me confused again... (they should have a 'confused' font.) I hardly hug but I do hug by trauma when I accidentally come across it. Because I would like to hug the person IRL!


That kind of hug is fine, its when the poster doesn't need the hug and they recive a hug out of pity ' I'm so sorry you are you' or ' I pity you for thinking like that' sort of way.
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Jewishfoodie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 12:24 am
Boca00 wrote:
Sorry, I'm not so good at explaining things!
But let me try again...

1. If the post is a vent or asking advice re a painful situation, a hug is good. I feel for you. I empathize.
2. If the post is innocuous, like I ate chicken for supper or I like Pantene shampoo, then a hug is used by stalkers who just hug every post that imaxyz writes because they want to be annoying or they pity her general worldview.
3. If a post is perceived as braggy or privileged, a hug is jealous. For example, if a poster writes, "my husband wants to take me to the alps but I really want to go to France, I'm so annoyed! I went to the Alps 6 months ago!" Then a poster who hasn't left the tristate area might hug out of jealousy or feeling inferior.
4. If a post is controversial, then a hug is a dislike button.

I hope this makes more sense.


Got it! Why would someone be jealous of a stranger going to that Alp. Wait... I don't care. They can work that out for $200 a session..
Thanks Boca00.
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amother
Gold


 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 12:46 am
It's weird to me that some women are so bothered by hugs. I literally could not care less. Anyway, I post anon bec. I often post provocative things - not to rile people up and I don't attack anyone personally (or at least I hope I don't)- but will often elicit strong reactions. But since I often come in and out in spurts (as my schedule allows me to), I don't often have time to deal with the responses to my post, but yet I'm stressed when I don't respond to them (as if someone "bested" me). The solution for me is posting anon, which allows me to not respond to my posting if time does not permit me to do so.

And I just hit the anon button now, since I know I won't be online all day tomorrow and it stresses me out to leave issues "open."
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amother
Aquamarine


 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 2:53 am
I'm embarrassed to say so, but hey, I'm going anon, so who cares - I sometimes post anon because I've been on imamother for too much time today, and I'm embarrassed that someone sees me responding to so many threads within 1 hour. Like "doesn't she have anything better to do with her life".
Please tell me - does anyone else post anon for this reason??
embarrassed
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imasoftov




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 6:22 am
crust wrote:
That hug was from your cleaning lady.

That could lead to a massage ...
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 7:18 am
amother wrote:
I'm embarrassed to say so, but hey, I'm going anon, so who cares - I sometimes post anon because I've been on imamother for too much time today, and I'm embarrassed that someone sees me responding to so many threads within 1 hour. Like "doesn't she have anything better to do with her life".
Please tell me - does anyone else post anon for this reason??
embarrassed

I don't go anon because of this. But those thoughts sometimes pop into my head. I just figured it's quite obvious I have an addiction to Imamother and one day all the smothers may have to call for an intervention on my behalf . But truthfully, I do a lot of stuff in between reading and posting. Regardless, if you feel you need to go anon because of what others may think of your constant posting that just means you are feeling insecure about it. We have to teach ourselves that we can't live our lives based on what everyone else thinks of us. Be you. Be the best you and that's what counts.
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InnerMe




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 10:33 am
Jewishfoodie wrote:
OK. Color me confused again... (they should have a 'confused' font.) I hardly hug but I do hug by trauma when I accidentally come across it. Because I would like to hug the person IRL!

Listen darling, you are too good to get these things.
After being on here some time... I've learnt that some people use it for other reasons then love.

But I have come across Imas (that are probably new) that hug because they are happy for you. I vote for an explanation hug button LOL

So since I don't know what the hug explanation is, I'll go with the love probability. Because, why not? And it feels good and great and awesome. Thanks for the hugs Imas!!

And crust I like the poser hugs idea. But I bet you it'll be a full time job. You won't have time for anything else.
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amother
Blush


 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 11:04 am
amother wrote:
I'm embarrassed to say so, but hey, I'm going anon, so who cares - I sometimes post anon because I've been on imamother for too much time today, and I'm embarrassed that someone sees me responding to so many threads within 1 hour. Like "doesn't she have anything better to do with her life".
Please tell me - does anyone else post anon for this reason??
embarrassed

I've done this when I was up at 3am and didn't want my IRL friends to know my schedule.
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SpottedBanana




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 2:32 pm
amother wrote:
I almost always post anonymously, even over very parve issues, because I don't want anyone developing a profile of me.


This is exactly why we have screen names at all -- the point is so that just like IRL, we can take in what you say against the context of what we know about you. I will take hashkafa advice much sooner from Chayalle than from dancingqueen, for example, even though I've met neither, because Chayalle's posts in the past have matched my hashkafa much more than those of dancingqueen (no offense to dancingqueen). Because of this, I rarely read amother posts -- I can only speak for myself, but I'll want to read your posts much more if you show your character here.

(You don't have to reveal facts like where you live or anything -- zaq, for example, posts prolifically but has never revealed her location other than that it's OOT.)
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 2:48 pm
SpottedBanana wrote:
This is exactly why we have screen names at all -- the point is so that just like IRL, we can take in what you say against the context of what we know about you. I will take hashkafa advice much sooner from Chayalle than from dancingqueen, for example, even though I've met neither, because Chayalle's posts in the past have matched my hashkafa much more than those of dancingqueen (no offense to dancingqueen). Because of this, I rarely read amother posts -- I can only speak for myself, but I'll want to read your posts much more if you show your character here.

(You don't have to reveal facts like where you live or anything -- zaq, for example, posts prolifically but has never revealed her location other than that it's OOT.)


I posted in response to a comment you made yesterday on "annon" mode because I didn't want my screen name being associated with corny jokes (and poorly delivered jokes)
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Chayalle




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 3:24 pm
SpottedBanana wrote:
This is exactly why we have screen names at all -- the point is so that just like IRL, we can take in what you say against the context of what we know about you. I will take hashkafa advice much sooner from Chayalle than from dancingqueen, for example, even though I've met neither, because Chayalle's posts in the past have matched my hashkafa much more than those of dancingqueen (no offense to dancingqueen). Because of this, I rarely read amother posts -- I can only speak for myself, but I'll want to read your posts much more if you show your character here.

(You don't have to reveal facts like where you live or anything -- zaq, for example, posts prolifically but has never revealed her location other than that it's OOT.)


wow SpottedBanana, thank you for the compliment. I do agree with you that I pay more attention to posters where I recognize them by their screenname, because they don't use amother all the time. It's like hearing the opinion of a friend.

Though I will say, I like reading the other side of the story, too, and I love dancingqueen's perspective. It's what I like most about imamother - bringing together frum women from a wide spectrum.
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SpottedBanana




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 6:07 pm
amother wrote:
I posted in response to a comment you made yesterday on "annon" mode because I didn't want my screen name being associated with corny jokes (and poorly delivered jokes)


On jokes I understand -- but otherwise I respectfully request that people follow the rules and only use amother when they are posting private or personal information. It's like, the one thing I agree with Clarissa on (okay I also don't like pareve whip).
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tigerwife




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jan 17 2018, 6:57 pm
A hug on a post means
A. I am so sorry for what you are going/ have been through.
B. I'm so happy with your post!
C. I not only like this post, but I strongly agree and recommend it!

No other explanations necessary Wink

I find that when there are more anon posts on a thread, the thread is harder to follow since it's more difficult to go remember who said what. There is a loss of community when all the posters are stripped of any identifiable factors at all. I think I only know a single poster here IRL (and she never posts) but I recognize the personas of many posters and it makes the conversation more interesting.

Many people have valid reasons for going anon. But there is nothing wrong with having a strong opinion! There are many opinionated posters here who don't reveal anything about their personal life, so what is the risk? That someone will disagree with you? They disagree with your post, perhaps, but it doesn't mean that they think less of you as a person. And sometimes, if a post might be really inflammatory, perhaps double check if it is indeed hurtful and harmful and re-evaluate if it is worth posting at all.
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