We need to cut back and I’m not sure how to do it

amother

Orchid

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 12:59 pm

This is our situation. We are extremely tight and bills are majorly adding up. Thank God I can say we are not in any debit since we have always paid everything, just not necessarily on time. Now we have a bunch of bills coming in and not making enough money to cover it all. Ione here is where the struggle kicks in. My husband is the one in charge of bills. We don’t go on any vacations or eat out or buy any clothes or toys. So our money all goes to bills (car, insurance, rent, apt tax, electricity, water, schools - which is really not a lot as we live in Israel. I think I covered all of them). My part is the food shopping. I know I need to cut back and start making cheaper meals but it’s so hard for me to feel I’m denying my children food they love or enjoy. Also I read the whole “rice” thread and there were good meal ideas there but are very different and to imagine having to change completely how I cook and how they eat, is so hard for me. The cooking part maybe isn’t too difficult with so good recipes but to get them to eat those types of food is so hard bec I know they’ll ask for the regulars and I feel so guilty. This motherly guilt thing is killing me in so many areas. So now what do I do? I know I spend too much on food and part of the problem is that I don’t take care of the bills so I don’t even know what budget I’m suppose to be in. Maybe I failed to mention that my husband isn’t the best budget-er either and so things are a bit hazy on his end too of what goes out when and exact amounts.

I feel I’m rambling so I’m going to stop now. Hopefully someone can shed some light. From the inside right now we feel very stuck and can’t think clearly as to how to work this through.

Tia

Cookiegirl

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 1:05 pm

Not sure how old your kids are...but I think one way to introduce new food options is to involve the kids in the process. Make theme nights, make contests, give them options of new foods to try, or ask them to come up with ideas on changing the menu using these 3 "mystery" ingredients. Also, if you can, take them shopping and show them comparison pricing, improvising with things on sale etc. You don't need to highlight that there is a money issue- you can make it about cooking healthier, and more creatively, and also teach some home economics in the process.

saw50st8

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 1:14 pm

The first step to budgeting is to track where every shekel is going. Literally. Write it down. You can use a program like mint.com if you do a lot of credit card spending. You need to know what is going in and what is going out.

Then you need to figure out real fixed expenses and variable ones. Can you negotiate you rent at all? Can you switch insurance providers?

For other bills, can you go on balance billing? (is that available in Israel?) Then at least you know you need a certain amount for water every month, even if you use more or less.

Try to reduce as much as you can. Do you use a dryer? Can you hang instead? Can you take quicker showers?

With food, why not try one cheaper recipe than normal a week and slowly build up?

amother

Orchid

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 1:19 pm

My kids are old enough to refuse to eat certain things and too young to take shopping and not try buying it the whole store. Whenever they come with me we always spend more.

As for involving them, that could work out well. They like helping in the kitchen.

I know how much I spend a week. The problem is more on the other side of things that my husband doesn’t know how much to tell me to spend because he isn’t managing the money so well, he isn’t sure how to do it properly but at the same time wants to be the one doing it and therefore I can’t do it. Not to mention when I did for a while he felt very unmanly and that he should be the one handling it. So I gave it to him, but it isn’t working out too well. But to take it back I feel will be more hurtful especially at this time that he feels very down about not being in enough money and he whole situation at hand. I also haven’t done it for a few years now so I don’t really want to but maybe I have no choice here.

ETA- I like that idea of one new cheap recipe a week and build. I also started cutting down on dryer use. Water this month doubled and we have no idea why! My husband said he’ll call to ask but hasn’t done that all day. Quick shower are hard because my kids are old enough to take by themselves and when I tell them to make it quick it doesn’t always happen that way.

underthestars

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 1:53 pm

Firstly, I am envious that you are in EY and making it work! We have been back and forth living there, and Kol HaKavod to you and your family for this!!

As for meals, I remember going to the shuk, seeing what was "cheap", and working menu meals around that. Since produce is very reasonable in EY, make up meals that are vege based. Instead of making eggplant parm I made zuccini parm because zuccini was only 5 NIS a kilo and eggplant was more expensive. Also, we cut back on dairy (ie- cheese, yogurt, etc). I even made my own cream cheese so the kids could have but I didn't have to spend so much $$ to buy. In USA, my staples were/are PB, tuna fish, pasta, and cheese. In Israel, my staples were zuccini, carrots, etc. We ate a lot more soups (and to make it more filling I would add oatmeal/barley, etc to thicken it up). I shopped at Osher Ad for the more expensive items (but still cheaper there than the local stores) and would buy the bread/milk, etc locally. For Rosh Chodesh, the kids got a pudding/yogurt etc which they chose. They also had a Rosh Chodesh cereal--othewise it was telma corn flakes or toast for breakfast. Many areas also have a "weekly sale" for fruits, veges, etc that we used to do. It is a machira with shuk prices and they sell other things as needed and the prices are usually very very good. If you are interested, when I get my next email about it, I can send you the link--you can check if your neighborhood is included in this. Eggs are fairly cheap, so you can make that a meal for the evening as well. Shabbos was the chicken/meat time, otherwise the weekly menu was parev or milchig, depending....

I am sure you can find many fun, yummy vege dishes that would work with your family. It is important that at least 1 night have a favorite for them....I would allow each kid to "pick" the meal (from a choice of 3) so they felt they had some say but at the same time it was controlled (ie-cost based).

Know, you are not alone and to be honest, you are doing great if you are basically making ends meet. We were always in overdraft....!!

amother

Beige

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 2:06 pm

I’ll just give u a few ideas of things that could be cut back and might work for u I know u didn’t mention using them. Things like paper goods/disposables, u can buy hard plastic for cheap. U can cut back on detergents for laundry and cleaning like cheaper brands or watered down versions. U can make your own stuff instead of buying ready made things in the grocery like tehina and tomato dip. U can skip certain condiments like coke slaw pickle salad. And use water instead of juice. I gave the specifics just as examples try to apply whatever works for you.

amother

Orchid

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 2:07 pm

Thank you so much for that post underthestars.
My kids love dairy and so I find I spend a lot of that. Between cheese and yogurt it adds up so quickly. Breakfast is usually cereal. I also find the time my kids don’t always eat what I send them with to school and now that money is tight, it is really starting to bother me with how much gets throw out and how much they give away because they didn’t want it. I feel guilty sending less because what if that day they are hungry for that extra snack? Snack is also an issue. I find I spend so much on snacks for everyone. I started buying a big bag and giving them in small sandwiches bags and some days I sending cut vegetables. But they also come home and each take snack again. So it is really adding up too.

ETA : I don’t think I spend on those condiments. Ready made techina and chummus I only buy for shabbos. I started buying a cheaper softener but maybe I should just skip that all together? We only buy soda or a special drink for shabbos too. During the week we drink water and sometimes I’ll buy orange juice.

amother

Babypink

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 2:21 pm

For meat, I saw someone mention they get chicken gizzards (don't rem. the name in Hebrew) and use that like ground beef. She gets them super cheap from the butcher.

Here is where I saw it.

http://avivahwerner.com/2017/1.....sier/
http://avivahwerner.com/2017/1.....free/

I'm not sure either one of those had it but look around at her posts from around then. She mentioned it somewhere and had some really good ideas. Not all of them will work for you (I think they dont' have dairy or much of it) but her ideas were really good IMHO.

amother

Peach

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 2:32 pm

What are things your kids WILL eat?
All leftovers need to be eaten.
If that means it turns into soup, meat filler, omelet filler, it all needs to be used.
That’s one way not to be wasteful.

I’m not sure if the same things that are cheap in the US is cheap in Israel.

Do they like chumus? Make your own using dried chickpeas, or what ever legum is cheap in bulk.

If flour is cheap you make your own bread, muffins, baked goods, etc.

2x a week needs to be a cheap meal day.

If you tell us what your kids like maybe we can help you put together cheaper menu options.

2x a week I make menjedra(rice with lentils) with fried egg on top. I serve it with cucumbers and if I have extra 2 TBSP yogurt (each person). If they are hungry there is more menjedra to be eaten plain.

Days I serve chicken. I first give them a blended soup, made from Shabbat cooked leftovers, or veggie scraps, a small piece of chicken and a cheap starch. They can have more soup or more starch if they are hungry.

I save ALL chicken bones- make broth out of it.
Even from baked chicken. Wash, put in freezer until you have enough, then put it in the crockpot with water and let it cook a long time.

The other day I had some leftover Shabbat chicken, leftover string beans, leftover israeli salad. - I ground all the veggies in the food processor. Then I shredded the chicken( put the bones away for broth) I added the chicken the ground veggies and 1 egg. Made patties.
This I served on sliced bread, tomato slice.

In other wards always re purpose your leftovers. Nothing gets thrown out.

Veggie peels (even potato) and scraps can also be used for soup, freeze until you have enough, boil, blend
leftover pieces of challah thicken soup beautifully.

amother

Orchid

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 3:02 pm

Wow Peach! We try to finish leftovers but don’t always. Sometimes I can be creative but most times I just make fresh.

We don’t spend on clothes because we get a lot of hand me downs from relatives and then I keep from child to child of my own whatever is still in very good condition. Toys we reserve for gifts or special occasions and the ones they have are most from grandparents.

My kids aren’t in tzaharon so lunch is on me too.

Breakfast is always cereal and I don’t buy the sweet sugary/ more expensive ones. For shabbos I’ll buy one box of a sweet cereal. They love yogurts and cheese, pasta, chicken on the bone or schnitzel/grilled, chopped meat into burgers or meat sauce that I fill with veggies. Tonight we did falafel and everyone ate accept one kid who had a cow and ate his pita with plain salad. I also sometimes make a hearty vegetable soup with or without chicken/or chicken necks. They’ll eat hotdogs but I prefer not to give them so it’s maybe once a month. They like eggs all different ways so I like doing that once a week for a lunch and a dinner.

That’s all I can think of for now. I also always make sure every meal has a protein carb and vegetable. So vegetable can be plain cut up or an Israeli salad or broccoli/string beans.

We also obviously go through a lot of bread.

SpottedBanana

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 3:15 pm

I have found Israeli cereal to be inordinately expensive at least compared to American cereal -- how expensive is it for you? (I remember seeing 32 shek for a box of Israeli bran flakes and being appalled.) See how much you're spending on cereal and how that would compare to other breakfast options like buttered toast. Not to say "no more cereal," but to encourage other options sometimes. Do they sell cereal in bulk at an Osher Ad near you?

Also, if you don't already shop at Yesh Chessed, have you considered stocking up on pantry items next time you're near one?

Also IMO the best post so far has been Cookiegirl's. This is the way DH was parented (not for money-saving reasons, just in general) and he is one of the only adults in my life who feels that the parenting he got was excellent.

amother

Peach

Tue, Jan 30 2018, 3:36 pm

The other day I took carrot, butternut squash, potato, peels, yes all peels that I’ve been saving in the freezer.
I also had some cabbage cores that I’ve been saving in the freezer.
I boiled these in chicken broth. Very well.
Then I added leftover challah pieces to the “soup”.
A little bit of consume soup for flavour.

I blended the whole thing with my stick blender.

Free soup- from things that ppl would usually throw away.