Improving Jewish Literature (merged)

freidasima

Sat, Aug 02 2008, 3:45 pm

I always wished I could write things like that....

Ima'la

Tue, Aug 05 2008, 9:15 am

RivkiA wrote:

I have read alot abt the fact that Jewish literature or the genre is not as great as "non jewish" writing.

So what are you ladies looking for? What do you want to read? What type of writing are you looking for? Let us "unknowledgable" ppl in on the secrets!

I was just thinking about your original question. (Well it was the original question before the thread merged! Smile

) Are you a writer? Have you published anything? Are you planning to?

What I'd like to see is:
-character development
-a reasonably believable plot (I'm somewhat flexible on this - many others aren't)
-good English
-no typos (not really the author's department)

I'm trying to decide if I should add consistency to my list. B/c the truth is, uncovering the inconsistencies can be such fun!

leomom

Tue, Aug 05 2008, 10:11 am

sarahd wrote:

Okay, I just finished reading the stories in this week's Mishpacha (Family First, especially), and I want to know which of you ladies here wrote them. 'Fess up, was it you, yy? mummiedearest? I can tell a writing style a mile away and those stories fit your templates. LOL

Wasn't me!! But now I'm curious to read them...

leomom

Tue, Aug 05 2008, 10:20 am

mummiedearest wrote:

yy wrote:

mummiedearest wrote:

Sarale, hearing her friend's mournful plea, decided that after the next fifteen years of upsherins, she would devote her life to philanthropy. She decided to open an underwear gemach. "No one else has one," she noted, " and there is such an obvious need for one."

Fifteen years and two days later, there were eight pairs of underwear in Sarale's mailbox. She sighed with satisfaction, success was within her reach, her chessed would soon reach those in need. Soon it would all be worth it, all the planning, all the tears, all the joy. She only wished she could have done it sooner.

The next day her oldest son Kalman trembled over the phone wire, "Mamme, I-I-I-I-I-I'm engaged." Sarale knew for certain that the underwear had been the segula for the shidduch, it was bashert.

Sarale set out to make some chicken salad for the l'chaim. Of course, no one in the family made chicken salad like Sarale. She was always able to add that special homemade taam to her chicken salad. She infused it with good taste and a rich tropical bouquet. Tonight's chicken salad was important: she had to impress her future daughter-in-law, Shprintze Faiga Henya Mindel Kreindel Chaya Leah. Sarale wondered how this girl had gotten through life so far with such a long name. As far as Sarale knew, she went by all of them, all the time.

Shmuely came home five minutes later, bringing with him an assortment of breathtakingly beautiful cookies, cakes, and herring. "Chicken salad again?" he demanded, anxious about having to ingest the stuff again. He hadn't recovered from eighteen years of upsherin chicken salad. "How about a nice fruit salad instead? I never told you this because it was bad for shidduchim, but now that Kalman's engaged I don't have to worry anymore. I really don't like your chicken salad. In fact, I'm allergic to it. You never seemed to notice my face swell up after all those upsherins.... Well, I'm not going to take it anymore. I refuse to eat another bite of chicken salad ever again!!!"

"Kalman, dear, of course I have noticed your face swell up but I thought you were allergic to hair clippings," Sarale shrugged to Shmuely while pointing to her hair.

"Sarale, spare me the dramatics and just make a nice fruit salad," Shmuely wheedled pointing to the bowl of fruit sitting on the counter strewn with chicken pieces.

"The chicken salad is already finished," Sara said with finality. "And what would an uphernish be without my famous..."

"Chicken salad," Shmuely said completing her sentence. "I'm sure Shprintze Faiga Henya Mindel Kreindel Chaya Leah is at least probably not allergic to it like I am."

"Come on, bring the herring platter," Sarale beckoned as she closed the plastic lid of the tupperware container into which she put the chicken salad in.

Ima'la

Tue, Aug 05 2008, 10:34 am

Quote:

into which she put the chicken salad in.

Love it!

leomom

Tue, Aug 05 2008, 10:52 am

And I think this (from mummiedearest) is classic redundant verbiage:

Quote:

"Chicken salad again?" he demanded, anxious about having to ingest the stuff again.

chaylizi

Tue, Aug 05 2008, 11:29 am

I love redundant verbiage. and I was positive that the baby hurt his forehead & had a nosebleed (and, and, and...)

Ima'la

Tue, Aug 05 2008, 11:13 pm

When I read it on here, I thought maybe that was the case, but alas, the first time it mentions his injuries, it says that luckily he suffered only a nosebleed.

mummiedearest

Wed, Aug 06 2008, 11:27 am

sarahd wrote:

ah, sarahd, if you only knew how often my husband and I pored over the mishpacha magazine for a good laugh...

where do you think I learned to write like that?

yy, we should publish in mishpacha.

mummiedearest

Wed, Aug 06 2008, 11:33 am

yy wrote:

mummiedearest wrote:

yy wrote:

mummiedearest wrote:

"Besides," said an annoyed but somewhat stoic Sarale, "What's-Her-Name doesn't have any allergies. In fact, no one in her family going back 15 generations has had any. I checked, remember? By the way, the genealogist we paid to look into her family wants his Shadchan Gelt."

"Sarale, how much does he want? I have a great idea. Why not send him this fresh chicken salad? I'm sure he'd love it."

"Shmuely, my love, you know I only learned to make chicken salad to impress your mother, who has been the BANE OF MY EXISTENCE! So kindly stop talking and set the table. Your making me forget the kallah's name... hmm... it started with an 's,' right?"

Shmuely shook his head sadly. He knew he was being obnoxious, but he couldn't back down. And if that wasn't bad enough, his obstreperous mother was coming to the l'chaim. Sarale was going to have a hard week.

mummiedearest

Thu, Aug 07 2008, 12:40 pm

chapter 128.

last week, we saw shmuely and sarale have a sholom bayis issue over chicken salad. meanwhile, kalman got engaged to a girl whose given name is to long to retype.

Sarale had a hard week. Her obstreperous mother-in-law came for the l'chaim and refused to leave. And, of course, the chicken salad got finished quickly, but Sarale found out who was responsible. Apparently Shmuely gave it to the neighbor's dog. In her heart-wrenching anguish, Sarale called her future daughter-in-law Shirley by mistake. Oy, the nightmare this week was.

Shirley wasn't pleased. She liked having multiple names, but Shirley? And Kalman's mother made the strangest chicken salad. It had mangoes in it!!! Shirley was nervous. She had hoped to learn to cook from her mother-in-law, but anyone who combines mangoes and mayo cannot teach an inexperieced kallah to cook. Unbeknownst to Shirley, Kalman knew how to cook. He hadn't told her because he hated cooking. He figured anything was better than his mother's chicken salad, so even if Shirley burnt everything he would be happy....

Crayon210

Thu, Aug 07 2008, 2:16 pm

I am in the middle of An American Saga. I have a lot of issues with the book.

ONE IS THE TENSES.

Within the same paragraph, the author changes tense. Present to past to present to past. STOP. JUST STOP.

I don't usually bring up technical aspects like grammar and spelling, because those are givens and it's not really a problem, just a symptom of the problem.

But this is awful. Mad

amother

Thu, Aug 07 2008, 2:24 pm

Is all of this really that nice? I have a casual friend who's a pretty popular frum novelist, and who is on this board, whose feelings are probably pretty hurt by now. If you can't say something nice, ...

Crayon210

Thu, Aug 07 2008, 2:27 pm

I'm not posting just to vent. I HOPE SOMEONE READS THIS AND DOES SOMETHING. It's so difficult to read such terrible writing. We want to read Jewish novels, we want to relax with something frum and kosher and enjoyable. But it's insulting to present this so-called "literature" to the public and pass it off as the best we can do.

Raisin

Thu, Aug 07 2008, 4:17 pm

amother wrote:

there are good Jewish novelists, just not enough. There are also lots of bad ones. Not quite as bad as mummiedearest makes them out to be, but pretty bad. And the editing of these books is also at fault.

mummiedearest

Sun, Aug 10 2008, 9:30 pm

Raisin wrote:

amother wrote:

my dear raisin,
thank you for the compliment. I'd say my work here is done, but I have 200 more chapters to cover before my next yeshivish-speaking dickens imitation.

leomom

Sun, Aug 10 2008, 11:15 pm

Mummiedearest, I have completely lost the plot arc and bow to your superior linguistic confabulations, conflagrations, contradictions, or some other long word that starts with "con" and may have the exact meaning I intend.

If your work is through, mine is, too. I think our story is ready for publication without any further revision or editing.

Thanks for the collaboration! Very Happy

I do wonder what will become of Sarale and Shmuely at the end of this saga. I guess we will never know.

(To the amother who said this isn't very nice, I actually sort of agree with you. I think valid issues have been raised about the quality of contemporary Jewish literature, but of course mummiedearest and I have been having fun exaggerating those issues to pieces. Also, there are certainly good Jewish books, and your friend may well be one of the authors writing the better stuff.)

sarahd

Mon, Aug 11 2008, 2:07 am

And you know what? I think it's not the end of the world if frum writers find out that people have big problems with the quality of much of frum writing. Maybe some of them will feel called upon to improve their skills.