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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 2:30 pm
Anyone here doing it without any "support"? If so, HOW?!
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eggplant









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 2:41 pm
DH went out to work when we couldn't afford to pay our bills. We didn't want to burden our parents in any way.
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In the kitchen









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 2:49 pm
I know a very chosheva family where the husband is full time in kollel and they have k"h 17 wonderful children...how they manage is the husband also teaches one class of boys (or tutors them), the wife in the beggining had a play group at her home, and now that her youngest is in school she teaches in the girls school 2 classes. All the clothes are handme down. All the food is homemade with the exception of the vachan bread. They do have cheap cleaning help on erev Shabbosim for a few hours.

They also made one of their rooms into a rental (blocked off interior door, made exterior entrance and blocked off connecting bathroom) renting one bedroom and bath. They get monthly rent from that as well.

Hatzlocho!
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cdawnr









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 2:59 pm
In the kitchen wrote:
I know a very chosheva family where the husband is full time in kollel and they have k"h 17 wonderful children...how they manage is the husband also teaches one class of boys (or tutors them), the wife in the beggining had a play group at her home, and now that her youngest is in school she teaches in the girls school 2 classes. All the clothes are handme down. All the food is homemade with the exception of the vachan bread. They do have cheap cleaning help on erev Shabbosim for a few hours.

They also made one of their rooms into a rental (blocked off interior door, made exterior entrance and blocked off connecting bathroom) renting one bedroom and bath. They get monthly rent from that as well.

Hatzlocho!


But did they have help in the beginning? I can't imagine they could make enough to feed a growing family and buy a house that they could alter by running a play group and teaching one class of boys!
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:02 pm
My husband is in kollel. He's supposed to be getting paid every month, but didn't for the last few months. The kollel is very low on money. I bring in all the money. I have no kids yet, so maybe that makes it much easier. I pay rent $950 a month for a one bedroom apt. & managing pretty well b"h. my grocery bill is around $50 - $70 a week & thats about all my expenses! when the season changes & I need new cloths, I dont spend as much as I did before I got married Wink & I'm carefull not to overdue it with other extra things that month.
I just know that Hashem gives everyone the amount of money they're supposed to make & no worrying or working harder is going to help!
Hatzlocha
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Hashem_Yaazor









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:07 pm
amother wrote:
Anyone here doing it without any "support"? If so, HOW?!

I'm married about 4 years and managing. How?
I work full time, do take the government assistance we qualify for healthcare wise and therefore can pay for a lower level health insurance plan, try to spend below our means by using coupons, buying in bulk when possible, making what I can from scratch, live in a 2 bedroom in a community that is cheaper by far rent wise than many other places, and my husband gets a stipend as well (stipend for kollel + night seder, and he is part of a shabbos kollel as well)...we only have one vehicle and my husband gets rides to yeshiva, so that saves us money on insurance and gas, I don't spend more than $4-5 on any article of clothing for the children, and even shop second hand.
I don't know how we do it. We just try not to worry about it, try to live as simply as possible, and leave the rest up to Hashem.

How much longer will we/can we live like this? I honestly have no idea. Rent is already $100 more a month than it was 3 years ago, and when we can't make ends meet, we'll re-evaluate. But for the beginning of marriage, in our location, it's very doable.
(And no, my job isn't such great pay, nor do I have benefits. But it's enough.)
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:08 pm
OP here.

imamother #2:
How are rent and food your only expenses? What about insurance, phones, medical, car (if u have one), sheitel, laundry, etc.....
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In the kitchen









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:08 pm
cdawnr, I know they did not have any help even in the beggining.

Before they separated the room into an entity of its own they rented out (boarded) a couple of high school girls. Having somone rent by you definitely helps a great deal with finances. You just have to find the right people/person. If you can depend on the rent coming in from them you can pay a mortgage.
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In the kitchen









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:13 pm
They didn't alter their house for the play group...Im not sure what you mean. But their house is very very worn out and could use a ton of TLC (ie, needs desparately to be repainted inside, floors are horrendous, some kitchen drawers and cabinets missing their fronts (doors) etc. However, they manage!
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Hashem_Yaazor









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:18 pm
amother wrote:
OP here.

Imamother #2:
How are rent and food your only expenses? What about insurance, phones, medical, car (if u have one), sheitel, laundry, etc.....

I'm not that amother, but let me fill you in on my details:
Rent -- I can't recall, but around $780 I think now. We pay water starting next month, and we pay electricity which comes out to $20-$120/month depending on the season.
Phone -- we don't have cells, only landline. So no more than $50/month.
Medical -- as I said, state provides my kids with a good healthcare plan, so we supplement with a cheaper one for them and for us.
Car -- just one car, fill up on gas twice a month around, and insurance for that as well as renter's insurance costs us some money, but not a huge dent in monthly expenses.
Sheitel -- I only pay for it to be washed a few times a year. Otherwise, I do it myself.
Laundry -- I'm blessed with local in-laws where I do my laundry, otherwise, I would be spending about $7/week to do it.
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:19 pm
amother wrote:
OP here.

Imamother #2:
How are rent and food your only expenses? What about insurance, phones, medical, car (if u have one), sheitel, laundry, etc.....


For now my boss is paying insurance for me for a few months. After that, I dont know what I'll do, b/c I make too much money for programs & he pays only on the books but I leave it up to Hashem. My phone bill - sorry I left that out - is not more than $50 a month. I have a very good deal with Xchange. We dont have a car yet, I do my shaitel myself (I took a course by wigs for u) I know I cant live like this forever, but I take one year at a time!
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:23 pm
[quote="Hashem_Yaazor"]
amother wrote:
OP here.


Laundry -- I'm blessed with local in-laws where I do my laundry, otherwise, I would be spending about $7/week to do it.


Why would laundry cost money? for water? my utilities is included in my rent, so I'm really not familiar with that expense.
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:23 pm
OP again.

I live in New York. Rent is a lot more here.

Since it's only me and my husband, the amount of money I make is too much for any goverment aid. We're just over that amount, but it still leaves us out of any financial aid.

I thought that I could do it, but the more I realize how much things cost. (I paid for things myself before, but not rent or food, and that's most of our expenses). Food just keeps getting higher, and I'm beginning to freak out a little. I guess I'm looking for some chizuk...
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:24 pm
Laundry costs money for going to a laundromat
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:25 pm
amother wrote:
Laundry costs money for going to a laundromat


Oh. I do it at home!
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Hashem_Yaazor









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:32 pm
amother wrote:
Hashem_Yaazor wrote:



Laundry -- I'm blessed with local in-laws where I do my laundry, otherwise, I would be spending about $7/week to do it.


Why would laundry cost money? for water? my utilities is included in my rent, so I'm really not familiar with that expense.

Not all of us are blessed with private laundry machines Sad
I either can use the coin operated building ones, or use someone else's. It's a tircha, and a major one, but I spend my Sundays doing the week's laundry at my in-laws. I am very, very lucky I have such wonderful people near me Smile
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Aidelmom









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:52 pm
We take it one month at a time. I recently moved to a new city where the rent is really cheap.(400$ a month w/o utilities) I work as much as possible and am slowly using up my savings from working a couple years before I got married. Its not easy, but I beleive hashem sends the money. If things get too hard like someone said- of course we'll reevaluate.
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Strudel









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:53 pm
Unless you have help from parents, living the Kollel life long term is not possible.
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Aidelmom









  


Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:58 pm
Why do you say that, midwest? There are many people that do so. Especially in Israel it is very common and I know people personally who do. Are they doing something impossible? I think it depends very much on a person's lifestyle and what they are used to.
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amother






Post  Mon, Jul 07 2008, 3:59 pm
midwest wrote:
Unless you have help from parents, living the Kollel life long term is not possible.


Oh yes, you can speak for everyone. Rolling Eyes

Welcome to MY life where it IS possible.
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