Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette
Late night calls
1  2  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

Seraph




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 5:04 pm
I really dont like when people call me late at night. After 9 isnt really ok, and after 10 definitely isn't. My husband and son go to sleep early, and I try to as well. My landlord calls at almost 11 pm whenever he calls. The phone rings in the same room where my son and husband sleep, and I cant turn off the ringer bec I forget to turn it back on.
Or if not the house phone, they call the cell phone, maybe assuming it'll be off if I'm sleeping. But my cell phone stays on, with the ringer on, all the time, because it is my alarm clock, and if the ringer is off, it won't wake me up in the morning when I need to wake up.

Until what time is it "proper" to call? Do I have a right to get peeved at 10 or 11 pm callers who wake my husband, my son, and often myself as well?
Back to top

Lani22




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 5:13 pm
I would never call anyone after 10pm unless I knew for sure they are always awake till later.
Back to top

DefyGravity




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 5:17 pm
I usually won't call people after 9:30pm.
Back to top

RightOnTarget




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 5:20 pm
unless its a close friend in regards to something important or a parent, after 10 is off limits.

Make it clear next time it happens that after 10:00, phone calls are not appreciated!
Back to top

fiddle




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 5:25 pm
10 is off limits unless emergency or someone returning a phone call that I had placed within the past 2 minutes.

and in the morning...heavens nothing before 9 or wow I will not be a happy camper Exploding anger
Back to top

pinkbubbles




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 5:33 pm
I despise late night calls!
Get an alarm clock, and turn off the phones with a reminder note next to them to turn them on first thing in the morning.
Back to top

ss321




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 6:27 pm
get a "real" alarm clock and put your phone on vibrate
your home phone-id recommend turning off hte home ringer, and hten setting your CELL PHONE with a reminder to "turn on phone ringer" every morning at whatever time.

after 9 - eh
after 10 - rude unless its urgent (like parents and a real emergeny)
after 11- disgusting unless its an emergency

I turn off all my ringers at night. Phone, pager, home phone. Anyone who really desperately needs me pages me (that goes for school, also gave the # to my parents just in case). no one calls after 10, we have made that pretty clear over the years.

As for your landlord I would nicely say- please try calling earlier in the day DH leaves for work at [early hour] and I start work at [early hour]. We are light sleepers, as is our son. When the phone rings at 11, we all wake up, and uriel doesnt get back to sleep all night. I would really appreciate it, thanks!
Back to top

Mama Bear




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 24 2009, 7:20 pm
non-family or best friend I try not to call after 10. my own family I can call til 11, and my mother til 12, sometimes later. hte other day I called her at 1 a.m. and didnt wake her up yet (it was an emergency).

the other question is how early do you call people???

my sister I can call before 9, my mother I never call before 9, non-family I try not to call before 9:30. Mothers of small kids that have buses to make, I try not to call before 10 unless it's urgent.
Back to top

Marion




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 2:38 am
After 10 is downright rude, but until then there's nothing wrong. And it's considered rude before 8 a.m. too (didn't you once start a thread on this?), but in this country I start calling after 7. Most people are gone by 7:30.
Back to top

RachelEve14




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 2:48 am
Unless I know someone sleeps in or is up late, I call between 7am & 10pm. In the states I didn't call before 8am. I usually don't call people between 7 & 8 though unless I need something urgent. If they are up they are probably getting ready to go for the day and don't exactly have time to smooze
Back to top

cubbie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 3:06 am
The only phonecalls that are acceptable after 10pm are emergency or where the caller has specifically been told that they can call that late. Often I'll take a call for dh when he's not home and ask until what time he can call back and they'll say 11pm or midnight. But to call that time without previous permission is rude.
As for the morning dh starts getting calls sometimes as early as 6.30, but it's work calls on his cell and he needs to take the calls early because they can affect his day - he's a contractor so it will be things like a supplier informing him that the driver has left and will be delivering at 7am, or a worker checking that the things he needs will be there on time, because if not he doesn't need to be there so early etc.

I would actually say to your landlord that everyone is asleep at that time and in future could he please call earlier - and specify a time.
When I lived in England I remember on a Sunday I wouldn't make or recieve phonecalls before at earliest 10am. Here there is no Sunday, so everyday is the same I don't make phonecalls before 9am (except this morning I called my parents at 8am because our car wouldn't start, so I needed to ask my father if he could take dd to gan!)
Back to top

shalhevet




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 3:22 am
I think 10pm is the acceptable limit in Israel. However, among chareidim there is a different time clock and I would call until 10.30 chareidim I don't know, and those I do know keep late hours 11 pm. Motzai Shabbos in the summer/ the last week before Pesach certainly till 11 as everyone is up.

My dh often gets calls around 11pm - he only comes home then. If people call earlier and want to speak to him I tell them they can call till 12.
Back to top

Aidelmom




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 3:38 am
My general rule is that israilis I'll call until 10:00 americans in israel until 10:30 and when in america I called until 11:00. I'm surprised so many people abide by this 10:00 cut off rule. Why not tell this person you would rather not be called after nine and when a good time to reach you is. nine oclock is really early and I don't see how someone could know on their own not to call. How early do I call? Well in Israel 8 am and in america 9 am because thats when everything calms down.
Back to top

Isramom8




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 4:58 am
I used to think 10 p.m. was the limit here in Israel, but people tell me till 10:30 nowadays is fine. If you have an unusual schedule, let people know. My freinds know not to call during my naptime. Smile
Back to top

ss321




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 6:24 am
Mama Bear wrote:


my sister I can call before 9, my mother I never call before 9, non-family I try not to call before 9:30. Mothers of small kids that have buses to make, I try not to call before 10 unless it's urgent.

WOW! I dont exactly consider myself such an early bird, but feel comfortable calling people at seven. Some even six thirty (if I know they are working or off to school) but seven is my usual cut off.

also you reminded me though...although (since we have little kids), generally 9 (or 10 at the latest) is our "cut off" - I still call certain people till later than that. Like my parents, or some of our siblings. Difference: we have young children who go to sleep, they dont. I feel OK calling my parents till 12 or 1 because I know how things work there- my mother goes to sleep first, and always mutes the phone in her bedroom. My father stays up later, but mutes the phone if he is working or learning. so one of my siblings (who would be up doing homework) would be the one to answer, and they are often up till midnight or much later! But to other people I would never call that late...I just know how things work with the phones (people mute them as they go off to sleep) so I can feel confident that I wouldnt be waking someone up...
Back to top

meirav




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 7:03 am
Many chareidi men have a night seder that ends at 11, so most women are up until then. I have no problem calling my friends until 11.
Back to top

Isramom8




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 7:45 am
Teens seem to START calling one another after-hours.
Back to top

ss321




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 7:53 am
meirav wrote:
Many chareidi men have a night seder that ends at 11, so most women are up until then. I have no problem calling my friends until 11.

yea, but even so, many chareidi children are sleeping by then! my cornern isnt over me getting woken up-I am never asleep by 11, and true, my DH usually is up learning at nite. But if our bedroom phone isnt muted, it can easily be heard in bedrooms down the hall, waking the kids.
Back to top

Blair




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 7:59 am
10:00 is the latest after that it's rude. We also get calls after that and I have a hard time falling back to sleep. It's a very Israeli thing to do they figure that you are home remember they take afternoon naps and us American's never do so to them it's very normal to call people.
Back to top

Mama Bear




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 25 2009, 8:56 am
ss321 wrote:
Mama Bear wrote:


my sister I can call before 9, my mother I never call before 9, non-family I try not to call before 9:30. Mothers of small kids that have buses to make, I try not to call before 10 unless it's urgent.

WOW! I dont exactly consider myself such an early bird, but feel comfortable calling people at seven. Some even six thirty (if I know they are working or off to school) but seven is my usual cut off.

also you reminded me though...although (since we have little kids), generally 9 (or 10 at the latest) is our "cut off" - I still call certain people till later than that. Like my parents, or some of our siblings. Difference: we have young children who go to sleep, they dont. I feel OK calling my parents till 12 or 1 because I know how things work there- my mother goes to sleep first, and always mutes the phone in her bedroom. My father stays up later, but mutes the phone if he is working or learning. so one of my siblings (who would be up doing homework) would be the one to answer, and they are often up till midnight or much later! But to other people I would never call that late...I just know how things work with the phones (people mute them as they go off to sleep) so I can feel confident that I wouldnt be waking someone up...
WOW!!!

Even I dont get up at 7. My baby often sleeps til 7:30 or 8:00. And even if I were awake, I dont need phone calls when I'm still froggy-throated.

9 pm??? My night BEGINS then. My kids are finally asleep, dishes washed. My friends' kids are still up and about, they dont even have time to shmooze yet!!!
Back to top
Page 1 of 2 1  2  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Toddler night wean
by amother
7 Wed, Mar 27 2024, 1:16 pm View last post
Any takeout places near LGA open late?
by amother
2 Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:03 pm View last post
Why do day camps start so late this year???
by amother
7 Mon, Mar 25 2024, 10:45 pm View last post
9m old screaming the whole night. Arching back
by amother
11 Sun, Mar 17 2024, 1:40 am View last post
Do you return calls from numbers you don't know?
by amother
24 Thu, Mar 14 2024, 3:27 am View last post