Would you restore her sanity?

hisorerus

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 5:46 pm

Her name was Daniella.

I don't remember where I read her story, it was years ago. But it's stayed with me, poignant and sad, and it makes me wonder.

Her whole life was a maelstrom of horrific crises and crushing loneliness. She so wanted to get married, to have children. In desperation, she wedded herself to an abusive alcoholic. He left her after several years for a new victim, battered and still childless.

Alone and depressed, she would do anything to become a mother. But nothing worked.

One day, she cracked. Hysterical and uncommunicative, Daniella was taken to the local mental institution, restrained and drugged. When she came back to herself, they saw she had left reality. She was happy now, chronically happy. Every day, she would tell the doctor, "I had a new baby last night."

The doctor admitted, "Even if I had a magic potion to make her well, to bring her back to reality, I don't know if I would use it. She's happy now, for the first time in her life."

• • •

I sided with the doctor. Healing Daniella would be crueler than leaving her in her own world, where the sun could finally shine on her. But I read another story... and I don't know what to think:

• • •

The Baal Shem Tov, in his spiritual travels, discovered a wagon driver rewarded with eternal bliss. A simple man, he had nevertheless done his best to serve Hashem all his life.

The angels wanted to escort him to the highest chambers, but were restrained. He would not appreciate the revelations there, this simple Jew.

So they crafted for him a special Gan Eden: A long, smooth road, a clean and comfortable wagon, and four powerful and sleek horses. There he could spend eternity. And the Jew was happy.

The Baal Shem Tov later interceded and helped this soul to attain and appreciate true heavenly reward.

• • •

What do you think? If someone is happy in their pitiful life, is it doing them a favor to bring them to reality? Perhaps she might be able to acheive true happiness with proper help. Would you cure Daniella?

shoy18

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 5:52 pm

Wow, what a story, I would try and heal her, because everyone should have the chance to do better. All man wants to strive for the greater good, why should we deny someone that right simply because she lived such a misrable life, lucky for her, her abusive husband left her, instead of tormenting her for her entire life. She can still adopt, or even have a baby, if thier's a will theirs a way!

hisorerus

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 6:04 pm

But can she ever have the same level of happiness as when she's "having a baby every night"? And this way, she can have no pain from raising her "children," and no disappointments from them.

shoy18

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 6:32 pm

No one has a baby everynight, and when she is cured she will not want too. Who gives anyone the right to even think her children will disappoint her, maybe her child might grow up to be a great rebbe and by keeping her insane you are denying her that right.

mompete

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 7:24 pm

I think that by keeping her in such a state the doctor was taking away her choice. He determined that that was where she would ever really be happy but how could he know what her future would hold? Hashem created us to deal with this world. I'm sure there is more to this story with avenues that held hope in dealing with her troubles. Maybe a freind or family member along the way to come back to?

southernbubby

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 7:34 pm

Every now and then you see people who have created their own reality. In their own world they or theirs is whatever they want it to be even if that is not the way the world sees it. Sometimes they need to be shocked into reality and sometimes it is cruel to destroy the illusion that they have created for themselves. A doctor is duty bound to try to cure his patient. If life was too difficult she would probably relapse. Eventually that would be her permanant state.

Crayon210

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 7:45 pm

Another spin on this:

Sometimes I have seen some children with disabilities (like Down's Syndrome) who are just so happy with their lives. They love their families, their friends, their Yiddishkeit...they learn skills that they consider exciting, and can go on to have productive lives.

Are our lives better than theirs because we have a higher level of "understanding", so to speak?

Tangential food for thought.

shoy18

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 8:15 pm

I would think a child/person with downsyndrome is on a higher level then healthy normal people, becuase I have yet to see a ds child NOT happy with what they have, All DS children/adults I have come in contact with have been so happy and proud of what they have.

Crayon210

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 8:17 pm

So would we restore their abilities if we could?

shoy18

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 8:22 pm

Of course I would, everyone should have the ability to be the best they can, so if thier was a way to reverse it, I would do it in a heartbeat.

Frumom

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 9:33 pm

I would say that the doctor was right- if the lady was happy then let her be.

happyone

Wed, Mar 29 2006, 11:32 pm

Interesting thread. Got something to think about.

amother

Thu, Mar 30 2006, 12:30 am

if the lady is happy let her be

ny21

Sun, Apr 09 2006, 11:29 am

thank you for starting this thread -it was very

interesting !

amother

Sun, May 28 2006, 1:21 am

shoy18 wrote:

Of course I would, everyone should have the ability to be the best they can, so if thier was a way to reverse it, I would do it in a heartbeat.

I really hope this question doesn't offend anyone but does that mean that when Moshiach comes, a person will stop having Down syndrome or any other issue like that?

nehama

Sun, May 28 2006, 2:19 am

Sure!

amother

Sun, May 28 2006, 2:22 am

To play devil's advocate, is it safe to even let the woman become a mother? If she is mentally unstable, can she handle the rigors of motherhood? Is it safe for her children? For people who fall into this state, they may never be 100% "cured"

willow

Sun, May 28 2006, 4:36 am

Did anyone read "Flowers for Algernon"? Another book on this subject and gives you a lot to think about.