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Looking to become more FRuM or ChaSSIDic???
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sarahd




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 27 2006, 5:26 am
chen wrote:
ask any yekke, litvak, oberlander (my new word for the week--did I get it right?)


Good girl! A for effort.

Quote:
what do you call a yekke by birth who becomes a chassidisher BT (besides "disinherited" Wink )?


Dunno what you call him, but what you get is someone who comes to everything exactly an hour late.
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BinahYeteirah




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 27 2006, 5:49 am
You're cracking me up, Amy. LOL
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daisy




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 27 2006, 9:50 am
Amy, I LOVE the way you write. I seriously wish you would write a book. I have been inspired many times by your attitudes and humor. Smile

As far as bowling...I dunno...I have several really ultra yeshivish relatives. They go bowling. I have some other really chasidish relatives who wear colored shirts.


Last edited by daisy on Tue, Aug 12 2008, 4:34 pm; edited 1 time in total
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red sea




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 27 2006, 9:53 am
merpk - Rolling Laughter Rolling Laughter Rolling Laughter love the way you put it!
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red sea




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 27 2006, 9:58 am
I think we all just proved a point that people were unsuccesful in proving in other threads, these labels are worthless, its all relative, the same person would be considered frum to the endth degree in one circle and the most modern by the next. IMHO its your direction on the ladder that matters, up or down in torah growing, and that is all that should matter.
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ButterflyGarden




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 27 2006, 1:52 pm
BS"D
Amy, you stole the show!! LOL
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English




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 12 2006, 3:50 pm
sorry, im not understanding what's the definition of frum anyway!? if it means wearing 4 inches below the knee, or 80 denier tights, then am not convinced y wd anyone wd go there....
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amother


 

Post Mon, Mar 13 2006, 3:14 am
Quote:
sorry, im not understanding what's the definition of frum anyway!? if it means wearing 4 inches below the knee, or 80 denier tights, then am not convinced y wd anyone wd go there....


Why would that be the definition of frum?
And if we're already taking about those that wear 4 inches below the knee and 80 denier tights (are there really people who do?) then I'd be looking up to them, not saying why would anyone want to go there. But I guess those people will get their deserved recognition from HKB"H if not from us or in addition to us.
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English




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Mar 13 2006, 11:29 am
I didnt mean it in a derogatory way-ppl think being frum as dressing in a "nerdy" way, or being narrow minded! that is not what being frum is all about, although that is how society views it! we have to realise that frum means being close to Hashem, and that is then reflected on the outside! I know plenty of ppl hu dress exceedingly frum, and then act and talk like someone off the street, and then others, that dont dress "frum" at all, and are the most G-d fearing ppl!
seeing as this is the case in most places, please define frum!!
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ButterflyGarden




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 14 2006, 7:46 am
Quote:
those that wear 4 inches below the knee and 80 denier tights (are there really people who do?)


Quote:
ppl think being frum as dressing in a "nerdy" way


I dress this way every day and I don't think it's nerdy. In fact, I think I'm pretty cool. 8)
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happymom




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 14 2006, 9:47 am
Quote:
But I don't know that I'd call that "wanting to be more frum." I think I'd call that "wanting to get closer to HaShem and to go higher in Torah and mitzvos."
_________________


I think that is called becoming more frum... to me becoming for frum and being stricter is called wanting to be closer to hashem,( cuz why else would someone want to be more frum? Unless its for other reasons which I dont think are the best....)

I also know many people who go bowling, wear colored shirts and take thier fam to ball games who arent modern at all!
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English




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 16 2006, 5:28 am
I'm sorry rivkabatya, I didnt mean that dressing this way was nerdy, that's why I put it in inverted commas! many people,especially in my community, think that as soon as a person dresses b'tznuah, then they are automatically classed as REALLY FRUM and therefore they assume these ppl are full shomrei torah umitzvos etc, but that actually is most definitely not the case, frumness cannot b defined by exterior because many times ppl have to for society reasons have to "dress up" and they dont mean it!
dont take me wrong most of them do, but just because a guy is walking with a streimel nd bekesha, does not mean he is an angel, and never done anything wrong! so many women who dress slightly more "modern" (note the inverted commas) and daven 3 times a day, are the first ppl to volunteer for chessed, attend every shiur etc, yet they r classed as 2nd rate citizens in frumness levels because they dont wear a double covering, or whatever it is
oh, and one last thing - wher in any sefer does it say that bowling is forbidden, didnt know it was not appropriate until I read this forum
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ButterflyGarden




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 17 2006, 8:56 am
English - No worries. I was not offended. That's why I put the cool, sunglasses, smiley face guy. 8) 8) Yes, there are people who dress appropriately but do not act so. However, I believe it's a step. There are many BT's (I always feel that this is an inappropriate term, but I'll use it for now) who's first step is tzanuah. This happens more so I think with women than men.
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English




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 18 2006, 4:02 pm
if it would b ba'alei teshuva, that would b understandable, but wat about all those ffbs who were brought up going to the frummest skools, etc, and still just dont act like the true representative of the Jewish nation. it really bothers me! you see them sitting in restaurants, making the biggest racket, ordering the waitresses as though they were inferior, and that is not what is called "frum" in my eyes!! (not that im mrs perfect...)
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happymom




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 18 2006, 9:10 pm
exactly like u said.. noone is perfect and it takes a life time of working on oneself to get even close.... we should try not to judge others (im talking about myself too Wink ) and just be the best WE can be.... by changing ourselves, we affect everyone around us!
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ektsm




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 18 2006, 9:13 pm
YOu have all sorts of people out there. If you are interested in becoming "more frum" I think that's great. I just suggest you take things slowly so not to rush into anything. It's always better to go up then down.
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Blossom




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 18 2006, 9:22 pm
The Truth is that in every circle, EVERY there are the "nice" ones and the hmm...the "not the nicest" ones.
Going to the frummest school does not guarantee a special person. One needs to work on themselves, the school doesn't do the job for anyone, they are only there to help you along.
I do think that those that dress very b'tznius and are wonderful and nice, deserve a lot of our respect.
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ny_ima




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 18 2006, 11:18 pm
I always say: when u go up to shamayim, u wont be asked if wore bent up or bent down (hat)-- same with denim skirts etc.... the question would be whether dressed tznius... and everyone knows when they dress to kill and poke eyes out, or just beautiful likovod shabbos...

a prominent rav great tamid chochom once said a speech before yom kippur crying ' the women, the women, they don't dress tzniusdik...and it brings misfortunes to the community etc.' my dh went up to him and asked why instead of criticizing the 'women' (how would rabbi know how they dress anyhow? can't look and can't accept loshon harah...) instead he should focus on enforcing that the MEN are not allowed to look!
and believe me, if men were not to ever look at women, let's be honest here; women would definately put less emphasis on how they look!! it is our very nature to attract the opposite gender!
(I know some women who will initially reject this notion;but it's not my version of life, it's stated in the gemorrah which is factual not opinionated!)
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chen




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 18 2006, 11:40 pm
ny_ima wrote:
if men were not to ever look at women, let's be honest here; women would definately put less emphasis on how they look!!


not sure that's really so. I think lots of women dress 'for" other women. look at any women's magazine and what is it full of? pix of gorgeous women. go to any women-only gathering and you will see women dressed to the nines.
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ny_ima




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Mar 18 2006, 11:56 pm
I didn't want to get into that but there is also attraction between same genders!! Elokei Yisroel Sonei Zima. Hashem hates it. It is not the way of the world in its purity. yes, women's magazine push any filth! women who dress sleazy want to gain tumaah. thus bnos yisrael are innately bashful.
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