baby NEVER naps | Imamother

granolamom

Fri, May 21 2010, 3:07 pm

listen, you are a good mother. you are the best possible mother your baby could have, or Hashem would've sent her to someone else.
high maintenence babies are challenging. very very challenging. especially if she is your first. my first was like that and I am not kidding when I say I suffered ptsd from it.
please take care of yourself, get some down time any which way you can. regular down time that you know is coming will give you the patience and strength you need for a baby that gets cranky and just.will.not.nap. also, anyone irl you can call when she gets like that? for support, not someone who will tell you how great her kids slept at that age.
if you need someone, pm me and I'd be happy to give you my number and be 'on call' for you.
it does get easier as they get older because they need less sleep so they get less cranky without it. but these days are hard, don't go it alone.
((((hugs))))

amother

Babyblue

Thu, Jun 10 2010, 4:26 pm

Have you tried the baby whisperer method?

My baby never took naps unless she was in my arms. Even at 3 months she literally could go a whole day without sleeping!

If I'd take her for a walk in the stroller it could take like 40 minutes to get her to fall asleep -by then I'd be itching to get back into the house, but if I would -up she'd be!

The swing worked sometimes...

Nursing got her sleeping, but as soon as I stopped -up she'd be.

Just started the baby whisperer's shush/pat and PI/PD, (my baby's 4 months -it's a little different depending on the age).

Just been doing it for a couple of weeks. No it hasn't worked miracles YET, but my baby will fall asleep in her crib by naps (an amazing feat for her!) and on a GOOD day it takes 20 minutes to put her to sleep, she'll sleep for 40 minutes, wake up, then we'll spend another 20 minutes putting her to sleep and she'll sleep another 40 minutes. (Even when she used to sleep in her swing it was never this long!)

On a hard day she'll wake up 4, or more times, or take longer to get her to settle down, and on those days it takes more time putting her o sleep then she actuall sleeps, but at least she sleeps something...

I'm hoping it will get easier...

It's a VERY hard strstegy to use, but it WORKS (for me atleast), nothing else I tried or read got her to sleep.

(I did not try CIO because I'm very against it -my personal beliefs, not telling anyone what to do here.)

Anyways, if you didn't yet you might want to try the baby whisperer method. Her book's called "The baby whisperer answers all your problems", by Tracy Hogg. I got a used one on Amazon for $3.

(The book also got me to get my daughter to go for a longer stretch at night, and got her onto a routine during the day as well.)

Last edited by amother on Wed, Mar 13 2019, 1:41 pm; edited 1 time in total

MommyZ

Thu, Jun 10 2010, 4:33 pm

BKIND wrote:

This book is an updated rehash of pre-Spock baby care manuals. The information on breastfeeding is simply and totally medically inaccurate and Ms. Hogg's insistence that infants under one year need to be trained out of their bad habits is most disturbing.

The author believes that all baby parenting fits in cute acronyms (E.A.S.Y. and S.L.O.W.) and formulae. This is going to cause a lot of new parents guilt and grief.

My suspicion is that someone cooked up this extremely clever title (playing on the hot "Horse Whisperer" book, movie, and concept) and then built a book around it.

Great title. Terrible book. Remember, PARENTS are their babies' "whisperers." They know their babies best.

Katie Allison Granju

Author, "Attachment Parenting:Instinctive Care for Your Baby and Young Child" and mother of three young children

granolamom

Thu, Jun 10 2010, 7:08 pm

yeah, also, iirc, the author of the baby whisperer is divorced and the ex-husband has custody of their daughters.

in any case, any put-your-child-to-sleep method is worth trying. it has to feel right to you or you won't be able to commit to it (no judgement here at all!). I think babies know when we feel uncomfortable leaving them crying in the crib.
also, having had both types of babies (sleepers and non-sleepers), some babies really do not respond well at all to any cio method (even the 5 min thing, or the soothe-without-picking-up thing) and sometimes there is really nothing you can do but wait it out.
I personally, have gotten to the place where I believe sleep is a bracha like health or money, and not something within my control (hishtadlus, of course, but you've got to pray for it and hope for the best).
to the OP: wishing you lots of bracha in this (and every) aspect of your life. may Hashem help your baby learn to sleep well so that she and you may enjoy her waking hours more fully.

rachie

Thu, Jun 10 2010, 9:59 pm

My baby also never slept when she was teeny. I would also have to put her in the stroller or a bouncer and even then, she only slept when it was moving. She would sleep in my arms which started to wear me out because I couldn't get anything else done. Eventually, she just grew out of it (at around 6 1/2 months). I had to let her cry a bit and then soothe her ( in the crib) and she started to sleep beter..it took a while but I found that once she could move her body better ( like sleep on her side and her stomach ---she moved into the position by herself), she slept better.

gp2.0

Fri, Jun 11 2010, 10:58 am

My baby only took 20 minute catnaps (or shorter) from 2 weeks old till about 10 weeks old. One day at 10 weeks old she suddenly started napping 1-3 hours. So I guess it wasn't her personality. Sometimes she still wakes up after 20 mins so I pick her up for a minute (I find that sometimes a burp will wake her up/not let her sleep) and then rock/shush her back to sleep. Just wanted to assure you that it's not always the baby's personality written in stone and sometimes they can change.

amother

Babyblue

Fri, Jun 11 2010, 4:06 pm

MommyZ wrote:

Interesting that she is compared to Spock when she is dead against him, and all her techniques are completely of opposit nature too!

She doesn't beleive in changing the baby's bad habits -buy the PARENTS MISTAKEN HABITS, (such as getting into the habit of letting your baby sleep in your arms, or while nursing until it gets to the point that you can't stop holding the baby or nursing the entire time they're sleeping!)

Ms. Hogg is a big believer in 'parents being their own baby whisperers' infact that's the whole point of her book, to guide parents to recognize their baby's cues and follow their baby's lead. She says atleast a hundred times that her 'sample schedules' are just samples to give a rough idea, but every mother needs to observe her baby and not follow the clock. She just gives general guideline of how often the average baby needs to eat and sleep.

She also has great techniques for getting difficult babies to sleep, in a caring way that works for many people.

I'm sorry you feel so strongly about her book. Did u actually read it? Everyone needs to find the method that works for them.

(Btw, this has nothing to do with the breadtfeeding section, OP is having sleep problems with her baby, and the sleep section in her book might be very helpful.)